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Originally Posted by jackvance
I am like that too (@lukie), but I've always had very competitive friends to play games with so it's never been an issue. Never been interested in playing competitively with a gf or someone who doesn't play to win/improve. It's mostly just teaching them how to play chess or poker or whatever if I would play. With my ex for example she'd always watch how I played poker with her cousins, who I taught the game and were crazy about it. Sort of a 'let the men play honey'. But it got very boring for me, but I still did it for the social aspect of being with her and making a good impression on her family and friends. Like someone said, I'd find something cooperative to do, that's something you can bond over but still you can play to the full extent.
I mean, I dont NEED to play games with him. I have a regular poker group that gets me my competition fix and I know where to go if i want to play against people better than me at games.
It seems like the common theme with this is just to NOT play games with your other half.
Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
Do you touch his body with your body? And if so, do you also feel the judgement of the God of Abraham? Also, do you only feel satisfaction from winning, or do you feel satisfaction from more micro-successes? Is it important that you're more mobile within the confines of the game or that the result of the game is in your favor?
Some of these questions extend to everyone who agrees with Lukie's deep-seeded/seated need to win the game.
I prefer being the little spoon, but am happy clinging to his muscles too. Lol God of Abraham.
Hrmmmm satisfaction eh? I dont NEED to win. I am perfectly happy losing to someone better than me, so long as I played to the best of my ability. The fun with games, and this is coming from a poker and now a legal background, is finding cool strategies that exploit the rules themselves. I rarely cheat or do something I consider to be underhanded, but I will also try my best to "break" the game and find unbeatable strategies and test the boundaries of the game. The fun for me, is in coming up with a bunch of different strategies and then seeing if they work! The trollier the better!
But this is only because its unclear that these strategies are less effective or completely ineffective when i start them. A game is quickly boring and unfun for me as soon as I think I know the optimal strategy. Monopoly is boring outside of the social aspect, for instance. If I play a new strategy game, and find that everything but one way of playing was very ineffective, then the game becomes monotonous and unstimulating.
In much the same way, If i'm not playing to win. . .the game is also unstimulating.
Originally Posted by rong
I told her why, without holding back. I'm not really a holding back kinda person in relationships. Not in a dickish way, (well maybe a little, but not on purpose) but in a being honest way. As I said earlier, she is very much a better person than me in many ways and certainly at understanding other people and being sympathetic to their needs, so it wasn't that big a deal.
If we have friends over and say end up playing team games like say pictionary or charades and she isn't really trying, then I get very frustrated. It's not because I have to win, but because the point of the game is to win, so if I'm not trying to win, there is no point in playing. If it's just a social thing, then lets just have a drink and a chat, that way we can chat about shit we're interested in rather than whether what you just drew looks like a cat or a planet with orbiting moons.
As for playing games against her, I just win, always, every time at everything and that gets very boring. So I'm not interested in playing against her for the sake of competition. So I end up telling her how she is fucking up and how I can exploit that, and this will annoy her, so we just don't do it any more.
But who needs games with their partners anyway? I don't think it is necessary for a happy relationship.
Hrm, yeah I feel like whenever I've tried to explain how Im exploiting him he gets annoyed as well. Perhaps it is better to just not do it.
Is it silly to try and 'tone it down?' Like, have you tried solutions other than just not playing? Perhaps I'm in denial when im thinking theres a solution that lets me still play games with him without him feeling like shit or me not having fun.
Originally Posted by rong
Re the homo coming out AMA shit:
Is this whole thread really about coming out?
Are you under pressure to come out from your partner?
Is this a trial run outing before the big one in your real life?
Will mama and papa understand?
When you look back, do you now realise that yes, you have always had a better dress sense than your friends?
Do guys give better head?
Did you ever taste your own seaman back when you were single?
Have you told your most recent girlfriend? Was she surprised?
No, I've actually been hinting at it for no real reason since January. A lot of the blue text from that one ww game was 100% truthful
Im not under any pressure, no. But...I want him to meet my friends/family/etc, and theres not really a way to hide it. "Hi, this is my uh...friend...," yeah no.
To be completely fair, the only people i've told are those that reacted exactly as I thought they would. I was always very pro-gay rights, and very liberal in most aspects. . .and people that have strong christian anti-gay views or other senseless bigotry just never had a place in my life. I dont want to be an asshole to any religious followers here, so I'll just say that those that have a ton of 'blind faith' have always annoyed the shit out of me and a friendship with such people was always really out of the question.
No, this isnt a trial run either. By now, i've told pretty much everyone.
Heh, I was worried a bit about my dad. I've always been pretty close with my mom, and told her the second I was sure myself. It wasnt like a "eureka" moment, just over the course of a few months I gradually started thinking more and more about it and realized I liked guys too. Her response was essentially "ok, and?". I figured my dad would respond positively as well (he has a few good gay friends), but I was a bit nervous there. He still pays my food, so it almost seemed like the most EV move was to stay silent (considering the worst case scenario has me cut off). But still, our relationship is pretty good so I didnt see a bad kind of reaction as being too likely.
Regarding dress sense...no lol. I care about my appearance a bit more than most guys i'd say...but I cant bring myself to learn anything about fashion etc. Its just so boring! (I dont have that gay lisp thing either btw, bigot! )
I think guys give better head, yes. I mean, we can practice on ourselves...
I have tasted my own semen before, yes.
Im not in touch with my exgf. Its been a loooooong time and we fell out.
Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
The point inside of the game might be to win, but the point of getting into the game is to have fun and fun by-products.
Maybe I took too easily to that schoolyard bs about good clean fun over victory but games always strike me as opportunities to show off within the games themselves, and that doesn't always mean you need to win. Sometimes it does though. Like when you're a poor irishman in the 1930s and first prize pays 48 months salary.
Yeah, I dont get any of this. He has this "play to have fun" mentality, but I just dont get it. I just dont see how playing to lose is fun, and I equate intentionally making a worse decision with playing to lose. I mean, if someone wins...and its been after I've won the last billion games...I dont want to be able to say "I let you win".
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