And real racism has everything to do with hate.
Not really. Sure, there are people who really hate, but for the most part they get stuck on the wrong side of the broad curve of history.

Racism is simply about considering yourself/your group to be superior, thus free to engage in various antisocial behavior, such as referring to the local brown person as a "Paki" whether or not he's from Pakistan, India, Bangladesh or Mexico.

Slave owners frequently bred with slaves; plantation owners in the South often had slave nannies raise their children. This doesn't imply hatred, but rather, a classist/racist mindset that made them think of black people as inferior beings who could be viewed as commodities.