Randomness thread, part two.

[wufwugy]

lol chippy got banned? because of general suckage or what?

[d0zer]

sent too many dick pics out i reckun'

[aubreymcfate]

[oskar]

aw mang
poor chipperson

[rong]

http://waitbutwhy.com/2014/06/taming...-run-life.html

[oskar]

Dis gunna be good!

[BennyLaRue]

I thought you were talking about this Birdman.

[Chelle]

http://www.bustle.com/articles/27700...ign=CMfacebook

Okay, oh dear god, go watch this.

Also - when you get told by a gay hairdresser your hair color is perfect for your skin tone, you know you're doing something right.

[bikes]

http://cdn.top4top.net/d_bf669793e80.mp4

LIVE FROM DA HOOD

[bikes]

for renton boost and deanglow

[d0zer]

that's a gift for erryone.

fucking shit rotten deck railings.

getting those screws out was a bitch. is wat she said etc.

[Chelle]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HkMNOlYcpHg

[Chelle]

this is tits.

This and a few other songs are played at my Zumba class, and it's awesome.

[bikes]

[Chelle]

i want to be its frand

[bikes]

[a500lbgorilla]

A little bit early to be declaring victory

[a500lbgorilla]

jk



American way

[Chelle]

What do I want to do after an hour of Zumba? More Zumba.


MOOOAAAAAAR.

In other news, I'm 96lbs, and that honestly freaks me out. Being tiny again is weird.

[bikes]

xpost /r/TIFU

I had a meeting at work today. There were about 30 people in the meeting, and it was very important. It was only supposed to last 1-2 hours, but it went way over time. 3 hours after the meeting started, I really had to pee. But seeing as it was already an hour over time, I was confident I could hold it till the meeting was over. No one else had gotten up since the meeting started, and seeing as I've only been employed there for less than a month, I wasn't going to be the first one to do so.

After 4 hours, my bladder was about to explode. I battled myself mentally, trying to convince myself to just go pee, while the other half of me didn't want to make a bad impression this early in my career. Right as I was about to jump up and just go for it, they wrapped up the meeting. As soon as they dismissed, I jumped from my seat and ran straight to the bathroom.
I started unzipping before i had barely made it into the bathroom, and I was already peeing 2 steps from the urinal. I settled in at the urinal and unleashed a fire-hydrant load of urine. Apparently I wasn't the only one who had to use the restroom, because there were more and more people coming in and using the toilets or standing along the wall behind me, waiting for the urinal to open up.

Not wanting to stand there and pee forever, I tensed up by bladder, peeing as hard and as fast as I could. I guess when you do this you also hold your breath. Either way, I pushed way too hard, for way too long. I started getting really light headed and lost my balance. I took 2 steps back and passed out, falling straight on my back. I was probably only passed out in the floor for less than 5 seconds, but that was plenty enough time for about 10 of my coworkers to see me stumble back, fall in the floor with my dick hanging out of my pants, and then piss into the air like an angel statue in a park all over myself and the floor. I'm not sure I can show my face there tomorrow.

Tl;dr Tried to pee too hard, showed my dick to my coworkers, and pissed all over myself.

Edit- I was feeling better about the situation after reading some of your comments until I realized that someone had to clean up my urine after I left. Omgomgomg

[spoonitnow]

That's fucking funny.

[bikes]

[jackvance]

Started off pretty weak and insecure in the first half but the second half our guys pulled through. When I went to the night shop after the match for some booze, I was stopped 3 times by celebrating people "gotta honk if you want to pass!" - awesome atmosphere.

[rong]

Where was that fellaini last season?

[OngBonga]

Hazard is a damn good player. I thought Belgium looked good. Algeria were stubborn and organised, it's hard to break down teams that defend with everyone behind the ball. When Belgium play against a team that attacks, it should be interesting. I think Belgium are better than we are. England will be strong at next Euros though, once the likes of Sterling, Barkley, Henderson, Sturridge, Oxlade and Wilshere are in their peak. That's a scary good list of young players, better than we've been for a long, long time. It actually feels like we have a team of potential stars, instead of the occasional star like Gazza, Shearer, Beckham, Owen, Rooney when he was young etc. The "golden generation" was very much overrated, there was only Beckham and Terry really that were consistently world class. I have more hope for this team.

[Chelle]

Sometimes when I feel bad the song from Finding Nemo pops in my head. The "Just keep swimming" song that the blue fish [Dori] sings. Yeah.

[spoonitnow]

I got that Finding Nemo game, be like just keep swimming bitch

[jackvance]

I thought Belgium looked good.

Only in the second half though. The first half was depressing. The whole team played scared and slow. They couldn't even scrape together any real chances, only long distance shots. There was literally only one chance inside the 16m but Chadli was so surprised he messed it up.

While the opinions vary wildly, my take is that Fellaini's personality made the tipping point difference. He isn't the best team player, he's arrogant but this arrogant confidence was exactly what Belgium needed. Suddenly you could see our captain Company take charge (finally) and press forward, after that it all started falling into place.

Crazy match by the Dutch again, 2-2 lol wonder how this will end.

[rong]

16m?

[Savy]

Think he means the 18 yard line.

Fucking foreigners ruining the beautiful game!

[bikes]

this is nice and relaxing.

[jackvance]

Yeah I just translated from Dutch, we call it the sixteen meter area or "in the sixteen". That's the penalty box or 18-yard box.

[rong]

I find that quite upsetting.

[eugmac]

The Germans call a penalty kick an "Elfmeter" (11-meter).

[jackvance]

I find that quite upsetting.

How so?

[eugmac]

English wanna keep their yards yards and their pints pints.

[jackvance]

It's eventually going to become the metric system for everyone anyway.

[spoonitnow]

fuck the metric system, fuck soccer and fuck the queen

[Savy]

The Germans call a penalty kick an "Elfmeter" (11-meter).

That's cool, call it whatever you want in a different language. But in English that shit's wrong. Nothing worse than hearing Yanks talk about football, Fox spots and ESPN are cringe worthy.

[jackvance]

It should be football not soccer. You hit a ball with your foot, that's the game. I know a (Russian) friend of mine would get furious when she heard the term soccer.

[spoonitnow]

I guess an elfmeter is like a baker's dozen.

[jackvance]

Never seen anything like this in such high def. Brutal.

http://static.dropcam.com/1e467fbd69...680f71f7f4.mp4

[eugmac]

aSOCiation football
SOC...cer.

just fyi.

[rong]

Fuck jv. There was no need to even hit her, the threat would prob have been enough.

Why did he go back to close the till?

[Savy]

Why did he go back to close the till?

manners don't cost nothing.

[jackvance]

The woman was pregnant but apart from the bruises she's fine and the perp (41 y'old) has been caught. I wonder where the hell Krista was though! Damn Krista.

Why did he go back to close the till?

It was just unsightly and would lack class to leave it open amirite.

[Luco]

Never seen anything like this in such high def. Brutal.

http://static.dropcam.com/1e467fbd69...680f71f7f4.mp4

Damn, what a buttlicker

[Chelle]

What a mother fucking piece of shit human.

[oskar]

Encyclopedia: A summary of human knowledge.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...rogs_and_toads

[Chelle]

So, my 2nd LOR (letter of recommendation) person fell through because they don't feel comfortable doing a "questionnaire" (it's more like writing a sentence in an answer form to simple questions) about me. I was informed previously that it'd be easy and no big deal for them to do it. Let's talk about how much I'm feeling hopeless right now. I know a couple of other people I could ask, but, since they're friends, I feel weird about asking, because I feel in a way I'm using them. Meh.

Randomness thread, give me ideas how to deal with this, ways that will actually work, and won't make me feel bad. Let's avoid Chelle feeling bad.

[Chelle]

Okay, disregard previous post. Problem solved. Lol.

[jackvance]

Do tell.

[Chelle]

I was talking to a friend about it, and he was like, "I'll do it!". He's awesome, has some cred, and a writer person. Yay for good friends!

[Chelle]

p.s. it's hot as fuck outside.

sun y u so hawt. y sun, y.

[jyms]

So much Lulz going on on the forum right now. I just want to say thanks guys

[bikes]

all i does is provide teh lels

[spoonitnow]

Oh boo hoo she got punched in the face, it could have been a lot worse.

[wufwugy]

Never seen anything like this in such high def. Brutal.

http://static.dropcam.com/1e467fbd69...680f71f7f4.mp4

The government forced him to do this. In a free market, he would already be a wealthy businessman and would have no need for criminal behavior

[Jack Sawyer]

fuck the metric system, fuck soccer and fuck the queen

Duck money

The root al oall evil

[Jack Sawyer]

Fuck daatt sgbit

[a500lbgorilla]

The government forced him to do this. In a free market, he would already be a wealthy businessman and would have no need for criminal behavior

[wufwugy]

I was joking btw

[a500lbgorilla]

I was joking btw

Yeah, everyone knows.

[wufwugy]

you never know. it's me. people think im a retard

[d0zer]

is that a rob ford / fabio face swap? oh hi I'm has no taste in gifs

[BennyLaRue]

you never know. it's me. people think im a retard

Incorrect verb used.

[wufwugy]

Incorrect verb used.

[Chippy]

[bikes]

who let you back in

[wufwugy]

protip: don't use shitty gifs

[oskar]

I am going to have nightmares about this.

[Luco]

.

[bikes]

http://www.reddit.com/r/KelloggsGoneWild


this exists

[bikes]

i feel like this is chipeaterman's reaction to everyone one of his posts




here is what wufwugy's reaction should be after he makes any post

[wufwugy]

hey looks it's bikes tryna get in with the cool kids