Select Page
Poker Forum
Over 1,292,000 Posts!
Poker ForumFTR Community

Man, I got Leveled

Results 1 to 38 of 38
  1. #1

    Default Man, I got Leveled

    I've been stopping at the titty bar 3 nights a week on my way home from work, and BSing with the smokin' hot barmaid. After about a month, she asks me if I'm married. Being totally honest up front, I tell her yes I am married. She says "That's too bad, you seem like such a nice guy, I wanted to fix you up with my mother."
  2. #2
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    28,082
    Location
    himself fucker.
    she's lying to avoid being too vulnerable around you.
    <a href=http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png target=_blank>http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png</a>
  3. #3
    BankItDrew's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    8,291
    Location
    Losing Prop Bets
    backhanded compliment imo
  4. #4

    Default Re: Man, I got Leveled

    Quote Originally Posted by Tiresman
    I've been stopping at the titty bar 3 nights a week on my way home from work, and BSing with the smokin' hot barmaid. After about a month, she asks me if I'm married. Being totally honest up front, I tell her yes I am married. She says "That's too bad, you seem like such a nice guy, I wanted to fix you up with my mother."
    Maybe Mom is 36 and MILFy.
  5. #5
    bikes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    7,423
    Location
    house
    Quote Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
    she's lying to avoid being too vulnerable around you.
    +1 obv

    ?wut
  6. #6
    Ragnar4's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    3,184
    Location
    Billings, Montana
    So; is our lesson here: Next time, lie through your teeth.

    edited to fix spelling.
    The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which unskilled individuals suffer from illusory superiority, mistakenly rating their ability much higher than average. This bias is attributed to a metacognitive inability of the unskilled to recognize their mistakes
  7. #7
    mrhappy333's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    3,722
    Location
    Mohegan Sun or MGM Springfield
    Just tell her its OK, your in an OPEN relationship.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  8. #8
    what's the level, her mom is prolly hot
  9. #9
    OP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    477
    Location
    Iso'ing Iso's
    It is our duty as men to fuc k every single, single mom and/or cougar possible.

    The same way we HAVE to blankly stare at a lit grill. It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity. I can't do it all on my own!

    You sir have broken certain codes of being a man and may God have mercy on your soul.

  10. #10
    bikes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    7,423
    Location
    house
    fucking epic post.

    ?wut
  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by BankItDrew
    backhanded compliment imo
    This post made me feel better.

    And to OP. Good thing you're a SEMINOLE fan or I mighta got pissed at your post.
  12. #12
    OP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    477
    Location
    Iso'ing Iso's
    Did you just call me gay?
  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by OP
    It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity.
    ?
  14. #14
    Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
  15. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by OP
    It is our duty as men to fuc k every single, single mom and/or cougar possible.

    The same way we HAVE to blankly stare at a lit grill. It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity. I can't do it all on my own!

    You sir have broken certain codes of being a man and may God have mercy on your soul.

    I'd like to hear more about what guys have to do
  16. #16
    OP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    477
    Location
    Iso'ing Iso's
    Not in the milf pic thread. Maybe some other time in another thread grasshopper
  17. #17
    Grasshopper? Im like a million years old. I just wanna know more about how we have to stare at grill flame and such.

    Like we have to de-clothe Barbies or have to ooh and aww whenever being shown a gun or large knife. Start a new thread and enlighten us
  18. #18
    OP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    477
    Location
    Iso'ing Iso's
    If you don't like cougar pussy and are offended by my statement due to some kind of conflicting homosexuality issues, its cool man. I'm an open minded person, I'm not gonna judge you. No need to just randomly be a dick though guy.
  19. #19
    I'm not being sarcastic. Your post was a pretty awesome one, and I wanted more. Like aboogorilla said, I lack social graces. Well, I don't IRL, just on the internet. So if I made you feel like I was being a dick, I'm sorry

    My internet 'growing up' involved a forum full of dickheads who did nothing but tell each other to go fuck themselves. I've actually toned it down a bit since then, but not enough obv. Is now the right time for emoticons?
  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
    Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.


    is it possible to put a paper bag over someone's policies, so that they're more bangable?
  21. #21
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TLA_f7S0cw

    I approve of this thread.
    Hey knucklehead! Bonk!
  22. #22
    bigred's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    15,437
    Location
    Nest of Douchebags
    LOL OPERATIONS
  23. #23
    flomo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    5,603
    Location
    mashing potatoes
  24. #24
    Those last two are kinda GILFy. I was thinking more:



    and
  25. #25
    damn OP, he called you a seminole fan. That's WORSE than being called gay.
    Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
  26. #26
    swiggidy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    7,876
    Location
    Waiting in the shadows ...

    Default Re: Man, I got Leveled

    Quote Originally Posted by Tiresman
    I've been stopping at the titty bar 3 nights a week on my way home from work, and BSing with the smokin' hot barmaid. After about a month, she asks me if I'm married. Being totally honest up front, I tell her yes I am married. She says "That's too bad, you seem like such a nice guy, I wanted to fix you up with my mother."
    Lukie?
    (\__/)
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")
  27. #27
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
    ?
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
    Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
    GMILF thread?
  28. #28
    This thread delivers.
    Congratulations, you've won your dick's weight in sweets! Decode the message in the above post to find out how to claim your tic-tac
  29. #29
    Quote Originally Posted by Warpe
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
    ?
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
    Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
    GMILF thread?
    With Sophia Loren, I was testing the limits of OP's theory: "It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity."

    She's over 35, under 160 lbs (probably) with huge tits and other mildly attractive features. But, personally, she's a GMIWNLF for me. Does that make me less a man?
  30. #30
    yes it does. I would hit that in a hearbeat.
    Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
  31. #31
    Quote Originally Posted by GatorJH
    yes it does. I would hit that in a hearbeat.
    Yeah, but aren't you almost her age? I need OP's opinion.
  32. #32
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
    Quote Originally Posted by GatorJH
    yes it does. I would hit that in a hearbeat.
    Yeah, but aren't you almost her age? I need OP's opinion.
    Dude stop being such a prick
  33. #33
    OP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Posts
    477
    Location
    Iso'ing Iso's
    Meh, I've done worse
  34. #34
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    Dude stop being such a prick
    Stop randomly being a dick.

    OP was right!
  35. #35
    Quote Originally Posted by OP
    Meh, I've done worse
    I'm sure you have.

  36. #36
    bikes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    7,423
    Location
    house
    this thread does not deliver

    ?wut
  37. #37
    Jack Sawyer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    7,668
    Location
    Jack-high straight flush motherfucker
    Milf?

    My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...


    Cogito ergo sum

    VHS is like a book? and a book is like a stack of kindles.
    Hey, I'm in a movie!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYdwe3ArFWA
  38. #38
    Muzzard's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    2,315
    Location
    Cheshire, UK

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •