I don't hate soccer. The World Cup games can be pretty exciting and I generally watch them.

I'm impressed by soccer fans singing songs all game long. In the U.S. we don't do that, except in college games. The Eagles actually have a fight song that plays after touchdowns, but the fans don't compose songs about opposing players. The closest thing I guess is hockey fans chanting, "Crosby sucks" or something, which is pretty lame in comparison.

The problem with soccer is there's no fucking stats! Americans like to argue over stats. Ted Williams or Joe DiMaggio, Mickey Mantle or Willie Mays. Chamberlain (ZOMG LOOK AT THE STATS) vs. Russell (ZOMG COUNT THE RINGZZZZ). And we're always looking for ways to find more advanced stats.