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How do you tell a woman ... ...... ......?

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  1. #76
    Oh man, you did not say that.
  2. #77
    I'm pretty sure he did.
  3. #78
    when she started rubbing her own booty, then I noticed her smelling her finger
    how the hell did i miss this before? excellent bump.
    TheXianti: (Triptanes) why are you not a thinking person?
  4. #79
    This skank sounds like the village bicycle
    Check out the new blog!!!
  5. #80
    quality bump
    Quote Originally Posted by bigred
    Would you bone your cousins? Salsa would.
    Quote Originally Posted by salsa4ever
    well courtie, since we're both clear, would you accept an invitation for some unprotected sex?
  6. #81
    BankItDrew's Avatar
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    I read the first three words to the original post, here is my response:

    Mention her vagina stinks the moment you notice.






    life is so simple man...
  7. #82
    grnydrowave2's Avatar
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    <SrslySirius> Hal Lubarsky, my nemesis.
    <SaltLick> are you seriously losing to a blind guy
  8. #83
    give her some dry heaves when your down there, then hand her a bar of soap
  9. #84
    Sounds like multicockitus
    It's not what's inside that counts. Have you seen what's inside?
    Internal organs. And they're getting uglier by the minute.
  10. #85
  11. #86
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    who bumped this?
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  12. #87
    wow, how did I miss the update...
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  13. #88
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    lol this shit is funny. my ex girlfriend from a long time ago didnt have the most pleasant smelling pussy as well. i would finger her and i would have to keep my hand under a pillow so i wouldnt have to smell it. eventually i told her about this and she would shower bfore i would come over so it wasnt nearly as bad.. just my two cents worth. now if yer single and are looking for a random hook up i would just say leave it the fuck alone theres plenty other bitches out there
  14. #89
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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  15. #90
    Chopper's Avatar
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    LHE is a game where your skill keeps you breakeven until you hit your rush of random BS.

    Nothing beats flopping quads while dropping a duece!
  16. #91
    Quote Originally Posted by Warpe
    "Can I smell your feet?"
    "No!"
    "Hmmm. Must be your pussy then."
    I lol'ed
  17. #92
    Deuce Blue's Avatar
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    I missed this one or wasn't around yet but I know that stink. My first wife had a friend that came over to the house and just took a piss. I thought something fucking died in the bathroom. The wife tells me later that her friend can't figure out why it smells so bad (smell was coming from the snatch and not the piss ) and her boyfriend won't have sex with her. I'm like ya? no shit? well tell her she isn't even allowed back in this house till she chases whatever the hell crawled up in her out of there. Like a week later she somehow figures out she left a tampon in there for like a month or something. She yanked that thing out and problem ended. I can't even imagine what the smell would have been like when that thing hit daylight considering it was stinking that bad all up inside her. Had to be like the bowels of hell. How in the hell do you forget you have a cotton sponge rammed up your snatch? Stupid stank bitch. I didn't let her back in the house even after it cleared up. Still surprised she didn't get that toxic shock thing. Would have served her right for stinking up my bathroom.
    You are an FTR station-pwn'ing badass motherf**ker. You have no pansyass, girly-girl, crybaby fears. Pwn the f**king stations like you know you ought to. And win some damn money, dammit.
  18. #93
    triumphant cracker's Avatar
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    well...i have ran into that problem too...heres what you do...
    go get a bottle of that fds stuff,(feminine deoerant spray) rember that stuff? anyhow leave it in yer shower,and have her take a shower w/you & yer wife and use that stuff on her. it might work,might not .depends how much garlick that hog had.....
  19. #94
    bigred's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deuce Blue
    I missed this one or wasn't around yet but I know that stink. My first wife had a friend that came over to the house and just took a piss. I thought something fucking died in the bathroom. The wife tells me later that her friend can't figure out why it smells so bad (smell was coming from the snatch and not the piss ) and her boyfriend won't have sex with her. I'm like ya? no shit? well tell her she isn't even allowed back in this house till she chases whatever the hell crawled up in her out of there. Like a week later she somehow figures out she left a tampon in there for like a month or something. She yanked that thing out and problem ended. I can't even imagine what the smell would have been like when that thing hit daylight considering it was stinking that bad all up inside her. Had to be like the bowels of hell. How in the hell do you forget you have a cotton sponge rammed up your snatch? Stupid stank bitch. I didn't let her back in the house even after it cleared up. Still surprised she didn't get that toxic shock thing. Would have served her right for stinking up my bathroom.
    what

    the

    fuck
    LOL OPERATIONS
  20. #95
    Quote Originally Posted by mrhappy333
    Just an update, we were all together again late last night, when she started rubbing her own booty, then I noticed her smelling her finger, ( when a light bulb went off in my head that said heres your opportunity)
    so I said, "yeah it doesnt smell to good, but it's still fuckable"
    she said" what? it doesnt smell to good? but it's fuckable?" in a pissed off tone.
    I just looked at her shrugged my shoulders and went to the bathroom to take a shower, when I got out she was gone. Havent talked to her today.
    I think I'm all set with that shit anyway, time to find a new chick.


    oh my fucking god dude!!!!

    did you really think she would stick around?? you gotta be a little more smoother man.







    did she ask about me?
  21. #96
    Quote Originally Posted by grnydrowave2
    Hey knucklehead! Bonk!
  22. #97
    Quote Originally Posted by Deuce Blue
    I missed this one or wasn't around yet but I know that stink. My first wife had a friend that came over to the house and just took a piss. I thought something fucking died in the bathroom. The wife tells me later that her friend can't figure out why it smells so bad (smell was coming from the snatch and not the piss ) and her boyfriend won't have sex with her. I'm like ya? no shit? well tell her she isn't even allowed back in this house till she chases whatever the hell crawled up in her out of there. Like a week later she somehow figures out she left a tampon in there for like a month or something. She yanked that thing out and problem ended. I can't even imagine what the smell would have been like when that thing hit daylight considering it was stinking that bad all up inside her. Had to be like the bowels of hell. How in the hell do you forget you have a cotton sponge rammed up your snatch? Stupid stank bitch. I didn't let her back in the house even after it cleared up. Still surprised she didn't get that toxic shock thing. Would have served her right for stinking up my bathroom.
    my word

    BUMP b/c the other thread in the commune made me think of this one.
  23. #98
    dont believe that story and dont believe the story that she had a tampon up there and didnt know it
  24. #99
    Quote Originally Posted by EasyT
    Big Red is tooo funny. This entire thread is hilarious.

    But, as you folks have just introduced me to askmen.com, I had to peruse there a while. Funniest posts there I found:

    Me and my lover want to try new things, and I brought up the idea of using chloroform. Are there any dangers I need to worry about if I were to chloroform her?
    Harold

    Dear Harold............
    You want to try "new things" and THIS is what you came up with????? Don't get me wrong....I'm sure she'll loooooove it. Just don't tell her before hand to bump up the "surprise" factor.

    backdoor barbeque

    I always wanted to experiment with putting liquids in my rear; is this unsafe or risky? The kinds of liquids I had in mind would be like lotion, baby oil or condiments like vinegar, barbeque sauce, ketchup, olive oil, or a tiny bit of Tabasco sauce (just to feel what its like). Do you have any comments on this?

    Damien

    Dear Damien,

    Your anus is not a hamburger. Please do not slather the inside of it with condiments of any sort...........
    Dear BigRed.....er....Damien.......

    PS. Stupid people shouldn't be allowed to have sex....for a whole slew of reasons. :P

    EasyT
    Im in pain and tears.
  25. #100
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    terrible bump, this brings up painful memories.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  26. #101
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by triumphant cracker
    well...i have ran into that problem too....


    I just read through this whole thread again. and I lolled.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  27. #102
    first time i read thread, and solution is very simple

    either

    be a man and tell her straight up, preferably like drew said

    or

    if youre a wuss and u dont wanna stop bangin the whore, go to microsoft word, type 'your vagina stinks', hit 'print', fold paper, anonymously put in her mailbox or in front door crack
  28. #103
    Gimme three douches... Squash-squashey, squash-squashey, stop lettin' da vinegar seep out! Squash-squashey.
  29. #104
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    first time i read thread, and solution is very simple

    either

    be a man and tell her straight up, preferably like drew said

    or

    if youre a wuss and u dont wanna stop bangin the whore, go to microsoft word, type 'your vagina stinks', hit 'print', fold paper, anonymously put in her mailbox or in front door crack
    haha, thats awesome.
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  30. #105
  31. #106
    lockpull's Avatar
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    I think I like this guy's approach the best:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqXi8...rom=PL&index=1


    wow... thought this was the post about what to tell a woman about your occupation when I posted this. But damn glad I went ahead and went through this whole thing.... good stuff.


    Decision making - When decisions are not based on information, it's called gambling
  32. #107
    OMFG I had forgotten how funny this thread was. Quality bump grandpa
    Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
  33. #108
    OP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lockpull
    I think I like this guy's approach the best:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqXi8...rom=PL&index=1
    "I can't shove my fist in your childhood dreams"

    HAHAHAHAHAHA
  34. #109
    nobody on this forum is allowed to like jon lajoie
  35. #110
    lockpull's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    nobody on this forum is allowed to like jon lajoie
    You, sir, are a Lajoieist!!!!


    Decision making - When decisions are not based on information, it's called gambling
  36. #111
    bigred's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    nobody on this forum is allowed to like jon lajoie
    Replacing wufwugy with john lajoie at FTR would be +EV
    LOL OPERATIONS
  37. #112
    replacing anybody with lajoie would be plus ev

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