How do you go about some balance?

[mrhappy333]

Maybe it doesn't matter to you young guys, but I have a Wife and 3kids, a job and side jobs. I also like to play poker and surf the internet, which I can't do at my job-I'm in construction.
Do you guys playin poker limit it to certain nights? certain times of the day? A certain amount of hours? If your up keep playing, If your down take a break? Whats the deal?

[IowaSkinsFan]

If you're feeling time consumed, why not quit poker to free up your schedule?

[mrhappy333]

Yeah, thats not an option. Poker is the air I breath, It's my passion, It's what helps me wake up in the morning,It's what I look forward too.Its what I think about,Its what I like to talk about.
I think my life would be alot worse If I couldn't play poker.

[thenonsequitur]

I can't personally identify with your situation at all, because I'm only 23 and I'm single and I have very few responsibilities, and thus a lot of free time, and my job is on a computer so I can surf FTR while working.

But, all that said, I hear that meditation can really help you get your shit together when you feel overwhelmed with the myriad responsibilities and depressing episodes of life. (But again, no real personal experience with that, so take this statement with a grain of salt).

[Bmxicle]

I play poker 10 hours a week and seem to have plenty of time for other shennigans.

[WildBobAA]

you only play 10 hours bmx?

[XTR1000]

do something where you dont need your brain. do some sports instead of poker twice a week, mtb dh, squash, skiing or boarding, something that helps to get a clear mind. it really helps to get a clear view on other things, mostly u dont need more time but to use the time given to you better.
if you play focused 10hrs/week you´ll move up way faster than playing burned out 20hrs/week.

[XTR1000]

edit:

look for sports, u can do with your kids! u spend time with them, u do sports for u and after 2 hours or so they wont need a story to fall asleep.

[givememyleg]

Get rid of some of the side jobs.

[salsa4ever]

can you quit your job?

[Galapogos]

But besides that how do you find time to do everything you need to do, and still have some free time?

Whoa whoa WHOA! There's stuff we should be doing?? Hey you-- you guys never told me that! I wonder if there's some correlation between this new revelation and my girlfriend taking that week long milk run?

[jyms]

Happy, I'm in your boat to the exact same degree. Since finding This site and poker in general. Poker is it for me. I have a wife and 1 kid, a mortgage, a FT 50hrs a week job with commutes in the 2hr/day range. What you and I are struggling with isn't more free time. If you had more free time what would you do? Yep, poker. It's everything else interfering with poker . Causing grief in the relationship. I have no big revelation for ya, just to say we are the same in that regard. Here is what we want, what you may be looking for. We need to excel at poker. Get to a higher stake. So that playing less feels like success. If we could grind for 2 hrs a night and have $200 to show for it, as opposed to 4 tabling $10NL or $25NL and finishing up or down $10 (or in my case down$116) and never withdrwing, it would be easier to get off the computer, feel accomplished, and spend time doing less fun but necassary and required chores. Spending time with the wife and kids is great, don't get me wrong, but it's more fun with the extra $200 from last nights grind. What you are looking for, is what lots of us working stiffs in our 35/40/45's are looking for. LESS WORK. MORE POKER. It ain't happening till we get to the $100NL or up and beat it for all it's worth. AMIRITE

[mrhappy333]

AMIRITE??

hell yeah urite

[jyms]

AMIRITE??

hell yeah urite

Dude, hit me up on aim, MSN or email sometime. I'm always up for poker convo at night while playing.

[flomo]

i quit poker and now only spend 10 minutes a week on FTR
(commune only now)

i did buy some nice things with the money though
and covered the kids with lots a presesnts for xmas

[BlueBull]

I solved this problem by making poker the last task of the evening but the highest priority... lol. This means I come home, spend time with the daughter, cook supper and kill off any other chores as a priority. I eat with my wife and once the little ones asleep i pull out the laptop. This means theres nothing nagging on the wifes mind when I get started....

I also moved my playing spot to the living area. I play with my back to the TV but close to the wife so we can chat. This works great for us although she needed to get used to me going silent in the middle of our conversation when I got involved in big hands. I also found 6 tables was a no can do with this arrangement so I play 3 or 4 now.

Finally - I take 2 nights off a week. This I find is actually good for my game as well....

It can work with a little compromise from both sides. Never let poker get in the way of the real important stuff and the family will come to understand that on a normal evening its what helps u relax.... letting them share in the rewards can do no harm either. I give my wife an honest daily update of my bankroll and we discuss withdrawls and what to do with them together.

No brain surgery here but it works for me....

[salsa4ever]

maybe I'm young, single and naive...

But what you need to do is follow your heart. In life, as in poker, sometimes you just have to GAMBOOL. Work part time. Eat sleep and drink poker. Deposit another $3000 and move up to $100 or $200 NL right now. Practice, practice, practice. Borrow money if you must to sustain yourself while you give it a go. If it all busts, well, it did - most successful people in life took some risks that didn't pay off at some stage in their lives. But at least you didn't die wondering

I could easily get a job as a lawyer, marry, have a couple of kids, grow old, retire, and die. But I'm not going to. I'd rather make a fraction less money then a lawyer does travelling the world teaching music and dance, and playing poker.

just my 0.02

[jyms]

maybe I'm young, single and naive...

But what you need to do is follow your heart. In life, as in poker, sometimes you just have to GAMBOOL. Work part time. Eat sleep and drink poker. Deposit another $3000 and move up to $100 or $200 NL right now. Practice, practice, practice. Borrow money if you must to sustain yourself while you give it a go. If it all busts, well, it did - most successful people in life took some risks that didn't pay off at some stage in their lives. But at least you didn't die wondering

just my 0.02

Are you being serious, I really don't need any pushing. this is getting me right where it hurts salsa. If i wasn't having the biggest downswing ever (but finding some big leaks) I'd bee all over this. keep shoving I may jump.

[Scrimmage]

Yeah I'm in this exact same boat. Wake up at 6am, get ready go to work, work, get home at 5:30pm, eat/chores/family till atleast 8:30pm or 9pm, play poker. So basically I'm lucky if I get more than one hour to play, and often I don't even get to play for an hour. I also find playing right until I go to bed ends up making it hard for me to fall asleep as I analyze my play in my head while I lay there, costing me more sleep time.

I just wish there was more time to practice. Three or four hours a day would be ideal I think.

[biondino]

Bluebull is on the money, above. I did a similar thing, albeit with less of an addiction and more free time (problem: one live-in gf who doesn't like poker) and the balance is decent now. Have a look at the article I wrote on it: http://blog.flopturnriver.com/post/b...rpoker-balance

I have to say, though, if a GAME* becomes more important to you than your friends, family and partner then you don't have a hobby, you have a serious and dangerous obsession and you need to urgently do something about it.

(and don't argue that it's not just a game because it brings in income - if it's income you want then make it a job, full-time or part-time, with all the disciplines - and time off - that such professional ventures require)

My personal 2 cents - devote time to poker within the same framework as you do other interests and obligations. If it's a hobby, don't play every night - actively do other things, even if they are little more than quality time with the missus or a trip to the pub with mates. When you do play, have an idea when and for how long you want to play, and don't do it if you're avoiding other obligations to do so or when you're in a hurry. The ideal is to look forward to playing, enjoy playing, but when you're not playing, don't obsess over it or wish you WERE playing - this way leads to resentment and unhappiness and is a sign of addiction and all that entails.

[jyms]

When you do play, have an idea when and for how long you want to play, and don't do it if you're avoiding other obligations to do so or when you're in a hurry. The ideal is to look forward to playing, enjoy playing, but when you're not playing, don't obsess over it or wish you WERE playing - this way leads to resentment and unhappiness and is a sign of addiction and all that entails.

uh-oh :