Epic FAIL In Progress, WHATS MY PLAY? [PICS!]

[aka_red]

okay so basically it was late at night and i was watching a movie and
browsing the interwebs for some funnys. and this is what i come across.



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my email to her mom.
is this for serious?

im 188888888888

"Couple things you gotta know - 1- we are best friends, so be able to deal with that, and know that everything you do, she will talk to me about. 2 - She (nor I) do not like smokers, drug users, or drinkers. ie: we are NOT 420 friendly, and if all you can talk about is how drunk you got at your last party, STOP and move on. 3 - She still has another year of High School cuz I didn't have her start when she was supposed to. If that bugs you, sorry. 4 - You will have to come to the door to pick her up, and our Black Lab will tell us if you are a good person - seriously, he knows!"

is OK with meeeeeeee

brewhahah i spend way to much time on my computing machine

right now i am a professional pokaR player. LOL AMIRITE?

so i spend alot of time on the interwebs playing and browsering.

i go to bcc. to stady biznuss. my engrish bad cuz too much internetsssssssss

but i graduated hiskool at sixteen so lol ahaha.

hi2u.

(i attach 1 picture of my oh so sexayyyy self)

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mams reply

AM serious - but you don't sound it!



Mom


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zilla repsonse

i am SOOOOOOOOOO for serious.
this just my personality i goof around.
and am siLLAyyyyyyyyy.

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mam replys [1/4]

Silly is good, as long as you know when to be serious - she can be that way too!



here are her pics. her name is Andrea, but goes by Andi



Mom

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[2/4]

woops....

here they are





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[3/4]

So, can you show me you can actually spell and type something correctly? Please? She's a smartie but she can't spell well at all, and somebody needs to be able to!!!

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[4/4]

so what is your name ? you haven't said

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zilla reply

My name is John. I won a spelling bee in the fifth grade. In my yearbook I was also voted most likely to succeed.

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mams reply

well you can spell John! (good name, my son's name is John)

cool - tell me more about yourself


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ALRIGHT FTR WHAT IS MY NEXT PLAY?

my ideas were to ditch said daughter somewhere far from home where there is a casino nearby i can run to or take pictures of her crying and post them on the internet all over. and try to get blown before ditching her. i am open to other ideas. and how i should reply to this open ended "tell me more about yourself". keep in mind i still need to get her approval before i can ruin this girls sense of self. oh and for all you trolls there is a poll. lol troll poll. ALSO ON AN EPIC SCALE HOW EPIC WILL THIS BE 1-10?

[Ragnar4]

Red, you are beyond evil.

You're like the diet coke of evil.

I'm at a loss for words because I'm basking in your glorious awesomeness.

I suggest you play it cool and roll up to the house in a rental car that is hot hot hot. (Bonus if the car was made in italy)

2 rentals, play the silly, funny, balla angle. 1st time rental is to go hang out with her and chill with her and her mom, play the family angle, 2nd time rental (same damn car) is to take her out on a nice date.

Then wtf ditch her.

Or you can just go straight to hell without passing go and collecting 200 bucks.. your call.

Most important. I say you stick with it until you get pics that would go on amature pRon sites.

[speedcake]

sticky?

[XTR1000]

hopefully this ends in a threesome with fat mommy and her fat daughter sandwiching you while having a contest who can eat the most burgers before you nut

[spoonitnow]

1. Get and post pics of the mom. If you need a reason say you'd like to know what she'll look like when she's older.

2. Blowjob pics.

Just brainstormed this one to you after a couple of other ideas which I'll note 1 of

1) Just get her to blow you and ditch her and when the cops ask wtfhappened you just say that you guys got in a fight AND she wanted to get out. BUT after she blows you and gets out you have some buddies show up and kidknap her LFDO. But don't like kill her or some shit.

2)THIS ONE IS GREAT. OK OK You drive off to some place then you have your buddies show up and ask you like where the fuck is our money and shit. Ok ok so the girl pisses them off or some shit and they either a)stuff her in the trunk(this one is a bit brutal) or b) tie her up and blindfold her and toss her in the back of their or your car. Then you be all like guys come on man I'll have the money soon or whatever.

After that be like GUYS COME ON PUT THAT SHIT AWAY and BANG BANG BANG fake gunshots! SHE thinks you died. Then they bring the girl to some place and drop her off. Make sure the guys you get take pics or w/e.

Edit: Number 2 may leave girl traumitized for life or get you in lots of trouble. If your going to follow through on this one you need to have a false last name OR actually take a bullet.

[pankfish]

Just brainstormed this one to you after a couple of other ideas which I'll note 1 of

1) Just get her to blow you and ditch her and when the cops ask wtfhappened you just say that you guys got in a fight AND she wanted to get out. BUT after she blows you and gets out you have some buddies show up and kidknap her LFDO. But don't like kill her or some shit.

2)THIS ONE IS GREAT. OK OK You drive off to some place then you have your buddies show up and ask you like where the fuck is our money and shit. Ok ok so the girl pisses them off or some shit and they either a)stuff her in the trunk(this one is a bit brutal) or b) tie her up and blindfold her and toss her in the back of their or your car. Then you be all like guys come on man I'll have the money soon or whatever.

After that be like GUYS COME ON PUT THAT SHIT AWAY and BANG BANG BANG fake gunshots! SHE thinks you died. Then they bring the girl to some place and drop her off. Make sure the guys you get take pics or w/e.

Edit: Number 2 may leave girl traumitized for life or get you in lots of trouble. If your going to follow through on this one you need to have a false last name OR actually take a bullet.

I've read this post

[bigspenda73]

the yearbook line made me laugh

[Ragnar4]

you do realize that if she, or her mother, or they both commit suicide after this level, you may go to prison for e-bullying. right?

Don't be a pussy, take one for the team.

[pocketfours]

thread delivers

[thizzSantaCruz]

easy answer to this question. meet her get some dome. end story.

Maybe this is your other half? omg omg

3)Fall in love, get married, have kids

[badgers]

lol epic potential! wp so far zilla

[BennyLaRue]

Get her to get a haircut, plz, ty.

[a500lbgorilla]

hahah

nekkid pics or you're banned from ftr

[BennyLaRue]

Also, you're getting levelled on 38C. Maaaaaaybe Bs.

[euphoricism]

Take her on a date to Jenny Craig. Post pics.

[ATOTHEC101]

sheeee fatttttt plus averae lookin, tho id pobs srill do her as im rathwr drunnnkkk!

[animal_chin]

If she was skinnier she would be banging imo.

[GatorJH]

xtr was the closest here. You need to casually ask, while banging her, if she thinks her mom would do a threesome with you two. I am sure you can take it from there.

[zook]

I'm not sure who's leveling who here. But either way...

[bigspenda73]

edit: fail, spoon already suggested it

damn, that's really a fail then.

[a500lbgorilla]

i think you should date her for about 3 months and separate on friendly terms.

[bode]

try hitting her

[bigred]

i think you should date her for about 3 months and separate on friendly terms.

lame humor that make fish laugh

[sandstorm]

great opp to lose that virginity, don't miss it

[Fnord]

I can't believe you got a reply to your first email.

Oh and....

[aka_red]

FUCK YOU SPOILSPORT. THANKS FOR RUINING THIS FOR EVERYONE.

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mams reply

The jig is up asshole. http://www.flopturnriver.com/phpBB2/...63.html#724757. You make me sick I hope for your sake you are able to mature. Then maybe you will be able to amount to something. It is pathetic that a loser like you will do this to someone for entertainment. You are scum and will never meet anyone as wonderful as my daughter. We are also reporting you to Craigslist.

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zilla reply

lol.

come awwwwwwwwn mAAM!

ITS NOT AS BAD AS IT SEEMS
I STILL WANT TO GET TO KNOW
YOUR DAUGHTER. PLEASE GIVE
ME ANOTHER CHANCE.

[aka_red]

i think we need to proceed to werewolves IRL to lynch the betrayer of the FTR brotherhood.

EDIT: THIS HAST O BE THE WORK OF PANKFISH. HE IS SUCH A GAY. AND A PARTY POOPER. AND HE HATES ME.

[bigspenda73]

fdjklfdjklafjkldfj

who's the mole????

[a500lbgorilla]

jesus! how did this happen? daughter deserves much better!

Lynch dwarfman

[Pythonic]

WTF, ban whoever busted this up!

[Galapogos]

Weak.

[Pythonic]

Lynch Pelion

[sil693]

this truly fucking sucks

[Hawk]

wow. what a fail.

I want to know who the 2 people who voted for "this is disgusting and wrong i hope you burn in hell." One of them has to be responsible.

[aka_red]

wow. what a fail.

I want to know who the 2 people who voted for "this is disgusting and wrong i hope you burn in hell." One of them has to be responsible.

QUOTED FOR SERIALNESS CAN WE GET A MOD TO EXPOSE THESE TREACHEROUS INDIVIDUALS?

[badgers]

mother is a psychopath imo

[spoonitnow]

What the fuck pankfish

[pankfish]

baseless accusations imo.

[Hawk]

baseless accusations imo.

thats exactly what a wolf would say.

[zook]

baseless accusations imo.

sure, but did you do it?

[Ragnar4]

Wait, so what you're telling me is: It's not possible, in the world of worlds, that someone stumbled onto this website, saw this post, searched all of craigslist for this listing, and the told craigslist?

Wait, that doesn't make sense!

FU PANKFISH!

[zook]

Ragnar's the snitch

[aka_red]

Ragnar's the snitch

cant has to be the pank

[kmind]

this is fucking bullshit. I'm seriously never speaking to whoever narked you out. That should teach them...

It was a damn good attempt though, gg.

[spoonitnow]

baseless accusations imo.

Bullshit we have motive, see above posts and previous history.

Why would you ruin one of the funniest threads of late over some bullshit like this?

[pankfish]

I blame google

[Ragnar4]

you wanna know how I'm not the snitch:

My knee jerk reaction is that Zill4 put her e-mail online and we all attempt to be suitors, and blow our cover right away, referencing one of those crazy things we said.

I'll e-mail her first!

[bigred]

bummer dudes

[Stacks]

At least now she knows you weren't lying about playing poker. Good step imo.

[Warpe]

[x] thread delivers

out of curiosity, what e-mail address did you use? anything with reDZill4 in it?

[aka_red]

I blame google

and we blame you.

PANKFAG.

[euphoricism]

I blame google

and we blame you.

PANKFAG.

over the line.

[BankItDrew]

send her my way, i need to screw 3 fatties by years end or i owe sweetlemon $50

[ATOTHEC101]

______redzill4...

[kmind]

I missed the whole hatred for pankfish thread/IM/chatroom/etc but pweeease say you truthfully did not do this

[ProZachNation]

It was me, thats my sister

[pankfish]

This is all pretty random. I don't hate red. I reverse railed him in a gauntlet one time as a joke after he knocked me out. Thought we were both joking. He may really hate me, I dunno. But I didn't omg tell on him or anything.

[aka_red]

This is all pretty random. I don't hate red. I reverse railed him in a gauntlet one time as a joke after he knocked me out. Thought we were both joking. He may really hate me, I dunno. But I didn't omg tell on him or anything.

wolf talk imo.

[nutsinho]

fuck her i did

[Kits]

hehehehe.....quality thread.....except for the snitch......grrr.

[AHiltz]

This thread was sooooooo going to deliver. I hope the snitch dies in a fire

[2_Thumbs_Up]

I just voted "this is disgusting and wrong i hope you burn in hell." I meant the mole though.

[ChrisBCritter]

wow. what a fail.

I want to know who the 2 people who voted for "this is disgusting and wrong i hope you burn in hell." One of them has to be responsible.

I am one of the two, though I only agree with the "this is disgusting and wrong" part. I did not snitch however, that would be crossing the line from passive observer to active participant.

I do not approve of fucking with total strangers in this way, there are enough fucked up things going on in the world without this shit. If this was among friends, I can see this being humorous, but why would you try to fuck up the life of a complete stranger? Obviously from the other responses in this thread, I am sadly in the minority here.

[XTR1000]

at least her self confidence is ruined anyway after reading thru this

[BennyLaRue]

at least her self confidence is ruined anyway after reading thru this

Nah. After the haircut, everything will be otay.

[GatorJH]

At least now she knows you weren't lying about playing poker. Good step imo.

funniest post of the thread.


Ph, and the snitch should go die in hell.

[GatorJH]

send her my way, i need to screw 3 fatties by years end or i owe sweetlemon $50

ping Swiggidy - he may have some numbers for you (if he kept or even got them)

[Galapogos]

I do not approve of fucking with total strangers in this way, there are enough fucked up things going on in the world without this shit. If this was among friends, I can see this being humorous, but why would you try to fuck up the life of a complete stranger? Obviously from the other responses in this thread, I am sadly in the minority here.

If you pimp out your daughter on craigslist expect to get fucked with.

[BennyLaRue]

Keep it in perspective. Had he actually gone out with her or pursued some kind of sham relationship just to mess her up, sure, that's totally immoral and he'd burn in hell for that. It didn't get there.

Of course, we could be the ones getting levelled here.

[phantom_lord]

ghey

[Stacks]

at least her self confidence has skyrockted after reading thru this

If anything, I would say Red did her a favor. I mean below I have a few quotes made by a few of the more desperate FTRers saying, in a round about way, they WOULD touch her with a 30 foot pole. Therefore, the mom, and child, should be happy.

fuck her i did

send her my way, i need to screw 3 fatties by years end or i owe sweetlemon $50

jesus! how did this happen? daughter deserves much better!

If she was skinnier she would be banging imo.

sheeee fatttttt plus averae lookin, tho id pobs srill do her as im rathwr drunnnkkk!

[animal_chin]

Yay! Somebody had quoted me.