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 Originally Posted by OngBonga
Slow and steady wins the race? No it didn't, the only reason tortoise won is because the hare was dicking about. If it's about the tortoise and not the hare, it's even more dumb than I remember.
Don't give up, because even though your rival is vastly superior, he might be a moron. /moral
Lol. Well, the tortoise could have just said 'Fuck it, i'll never win against the hare' and taken a nap himself. Then he would have lost. Point is, he couldn't anticipate what the hare's performance would be, but he was never going to win if he didn't try.
Also, the tortoise is an idiot for agreeing to that race in the first place, and sometimes idiots win. So another moral is to take heart if you're an idiot because being an idiot doesn't guarantee failure.
Finally, the hare's hubris cost him because he accepted a contest that had no upside for him. If he beats the tortoise, everyone just shrugs and goes 'Yeah no shit you won, you're a hare and he's a tortoise. So what?' But if he loses, he looks like a total dickass. All his hare buddies probably trolled him relentlessly after that, as did the rest of the animals in the forest. 'Hahahaha, you lost to a tortoise? Fail!"
A lot of lessons for a 30 second story. If it was in the Bible, the race would be preceded by three pages of "the hare begot another hare, who begot another, and so on...". And then after the race the hare's buddies would stone the tortoise or some shit.
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