Operation Get Better

Down 2 buyins on the day as well as the month. I'm really tired physically and mentally. As in I didn't sleep at all last night and haven't really slept in over a week and a half. I have had a twitch in my eye literally 24/7 since last Friday. My family and gf have noticed it. I'm also having personal problems with something that's been on my mind a lot. A combination of running worse than ever and my personal life has just equated to insomnia. During the day, I've become very lethargic and have become very short tempered when it comes to talking to anyone. Either irl or on AIM/MSN (sorry). Not quite sure how to stop it but it will be stopped. My gf is driving down today to visit me and we should be together for a little bit so I'll probably avoid poker at all costs for a couple of days.

What's bugging me the most by far is that I am learning so much and cannot wait to use the better player in me to only get shitted on and completely doubt everything. I forgot what it's like to win. I honestly have. I'm basically "owned" (in a good way though) by a couple of players coaching me for awhile and it's just so frustrating having them watch me and just say "std" or receiving HH and saying "std". They can't really see many big leaks. I know I don't play that great at all but like I see completely obvious, HUGE leaks at my stakes and it's just getting ridiculous. They'll win, I won't. Not even in hands against me. I'll watch them do the stupidest things against each other but no problem, they're a winner in the long run.

So, yeah, I guess to try to help myself I am going to complete some range exercises for myself and for one of my coaches in which he'll give me feedback on. I'm really hoping it helps and I can learn some things. I'm studying a lot with videos/articles/HEM review and stuff like that too. I have to start my 15k hands at 100NL run soon and I just have no confidence. It should be interesting. I guess now I don't really care about losing a lot because I'm still in the mind frame of wanting to flip $2k. I mean I probably won't flip but I've become numb to everything. Time to stop staying afloat and either sink or swim.

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08-06-2009 06:35 PM #1
kmind View Profile View Forum Posts Private Message View Blog Entries Join Date Oct 2006 Posts 5,612 Location Not Giving In	Down 2 buyins on the day as well as the month. I'm really tired physically and mentally. As in I didn't sleep at all last night and haven't really slept in over a week and a half. I have had a twitch in my eye literally 24/7 since last Friday. My family and gf have noticed it. I'm also having personal problems with something that's been on my mind a lot. A combination of running worse than ever and my personal life has just equated to insomnia. During the day, I've become very lethargic and have become very short tempered when it comes to talking to anyone. Either irl or on AIM/MSN (sorry). Not quite sure how to stop it but it will be stopped. My gf is driving down today to visit me and we should be together for a little bit so I'll probably avoid poker at all costs for a couple of days. What's bugging me the most by far is that I am learning so much and cannot wait to use the better player in me to only get shitted on and completely doubt everything. I forgot what it's like to win. I honestly have. I'm basically "owned" (in a good way though) by a couple of players coaching me for awhile and it's just so frustrating having them watch me and just say "std" or receiving HH and saying "std". They can't really see many big leaks. I know I don't play that great at all but like I see completely obvious, HUGE leaks at my stakes and it's just getting ridiculous. They'll win, I won't. Not even in hands against me. I'll watch them do the stupidest things against each other but no problem, they're a winner in the long run. So, yeah, I guess to try to help myself I am going to complete some range exercises for myself and for one of my coaches in which he'll give me feedback on. I'm really hoping it helps and I can learn some things. I'm studying a lot with videos/articles/HEM review and stuff like that too. I have to start my 15k hands at 100NL run soon and I just have no confidence. It should be interesting. I guess now I don't really care about losing a lot because I'm still in the mind frame of wanting to flip $2k. I mean I probably won't flip but I've become numb to everything. Time to stop staying afloat and either sink or swim.