Quote Originally Posted by jackvance
Oh yeah, there was something I forgot to mention.

Yesterday, after mulling over how to play this and interpret that for the umpteenth time, I just got sick of it all. Went on tilt or something. Fuck poker! So I went to 50NL and played total maniac style. Blew my whole BR in about 40 minutes.

So, I guess despite my best efforts, I was just too feeble-minded and simply not cut out to play poker afterall.

The end, I guess.
Awwww CHRIST!!!

Well I am now mulling over how to best respond to this post. I have to admit, there is a small part of me saying "nah nah told you so" - but the bigger part of me is just feeling bad for you.

Jack - you have finally gone down the road that all of us were trying to get you off of. The reason we were trying was because many of us have already gone down it. I am clearly a horrible learner because I have gone down that road at least 3 times. Yes, the great charizard has busted (or come as close to busting as you can get) numerous times. And each time it was because I got sick of the bad beats - sick of the grinding - and just said fuck it. I'll put my entire bankroll up at a NL table and double it up. I am due, right?? Busting that roll is a sickening feeling. You KNOW you shouldn't have done it, but you still did.

I do think you are smart enough that you can make money at this. But the whole thing of online poker is staying in control of your emotions, not worrying about other's play or other's bankrolls, and just slowly grinding your way up the ladder. The bankroll guidelines that you see here are set up specifically so that people won't bust. I understand that following them can be boring, time consuming, and just difficult because you want to test your true merit against "real" players and not these fish. But IF you follow them, you WON'T go bust.

It's a huge ego downer to take some its and realize that you need to move DOWN and not UP in stakes. And that itch to actually move up, "but just this one time to double up", is HUGE. I have succumber to that itch too many times. Unfortunately I always end up scratching that itch so much that I just end up one big scabby mess.

I hope you scrounge up another small roll Jack. But this time, take it slow. I don't care about any other advice you receive here - but if you follwo the bankroll advice - you will never go bust.