NEW 19+1 Hand Guarantee

Having read and examined Performance Poker (PeePee) extensively, I have decided to put MY money where my mouth is. You only have to follow a five simple steps. If you do what AOK says and LOSE, I'll give the first five qualifiers a FREE copy of the Theory of Poker by David Sklansky. If you try the Performance Poker/19 hand system and lose then you'll at least be guaranteed something worth reading, hence the name: 19+1 Hand Guarantee. This way you can quit screwing around and actually learn how to play poker!

No experience is necessary. In fact, you hardly even need a brain. Just follow the Performance Poker System and you'll be on your way to losing money in no time!

I repeat -- if you follow the PeePee Plan & Challenge instructions, AND LOSE, I will send you a BRAND NEW COPY of The Theory of Poker by David Sklansky ABSOUTELY FREE*.

Why would I do such a thing? First, I think Performance Poker sucks. If you read it and follow the advice then you're going to have a hard time making decent money. It repeatedly contradicts the proven advice of respected poker authors and long term winning players.

Sounds Great! How do I start?

First, you need to cross your fingers. You're going to need a shitload of luck over the next 30 days if you expect to win. Sure, I'm sending the books, but you're putting up the money. Bwahahahahaha!!!! But don't be thinking that you can be ditch the system and start playing winning poker either. You have to read and follow Performance Poker to the best of your abilities. (“I knew it!" you say, “So, if I lose you have an excuse not to send me the book.”) Wrong! AOK takes 100% responsibility for the way you play. I, on the other hand, am trying to help you become a long term winning player. You are only required to play the way PeePee dictates. If you knowingly stop following the PeePee rules and methods then you're already on your way to becoming a winner and are ineligible for the book.

Second, you need to read and think. Actually if you were thinking then you wouldn't even attempt to play according to what PeePee outlines. But for the sake of The 19+1 Hand Guarantee, read the portion of Performance Poker – No Limit! that AOK has put on his website and do the exercises.

Third, you need to register for the challenge. PM me with your results using the PeePee system and give me a detailed description of why you think you lost (please keep your reponses to under 300 pages).

Fourth, play anywhere you want. I'm not putting limiting restrictions on The 19+1 Hand Gaurantee because real poker isn't played in a bubble. Just follow the PeePee model to the best of your ability for 30 days. Again, play anywhere you want and at any stakes you want.

Fifth, you must keep detailed records. After 30 days whatever amount of your initial buy-in is gone, I will laugh hysterically over your loses and also send an outline of why poker can't be played with a cookbook as my free gift to you. This guarantee covers the cost of a copy of The Theory of Poker and shipping charges*– at my discretion. Any additional money you deposit isn't not covered under this guarantee (ie. if you're stupid enough to try this twice then poker, perhaps even life, is not the thing for you). Deposit bonuses do not count toward challenge winnings. Why should they? You didn't earn the money beating your opponents. The casino gave it to you.

The 19+1 Hand Guarantee: Where even inevitable losers are winners!

* Free shipping within the continental United States only.

And not only that, we will give you: not 1...not 2, not 3, not even 4 or 5...no, we will give you TEN steak knifes for free! On top of all the other high quality knifes in the package! Thats really unbelievable!

Edit: Did my IQ just drop a few points?

I played this system for LIKE forever, and oh my god, I lost LIKE all my money. Send me my free copy of seventeen, I mean TOP.

BTW, do you like my huge cock? He likes beer.

...

CAT FIGHT

<latino chick voice with finger snap> OH KNOW YOU DIDN'T </latino chick voice with finger snap>

awesome.

Originally Posted by bigred

CAT FIGHT

<latino chick voice with finger snap> OH KNOW YOU DIDN'T </latino chick voice with finger snap>

hahahaha

How come these days all the Strat posts by regular posters need to include a couple of paragraphs of thinly (and sometimes not so thinly) veiled attack on AOK?

People are fundamentally assholes?

Oh. I thought we were here to help beginners.

ill do this and win.

AOK has proven one thing. that no matter what how much his followers believe him to be a profit for profits, or how dumbed down his system may seem to all of us, he is ever the gentlemen in these threads.

Actually that's not entirely true either, but I think he is aware that the Aok brand is too precious to soil with explicitly ad hominem attacks - so in cases like this, turning the other cheek is the obvious solution. Of course, there's no such thing as bad publicity either...

I've never seen a post (even before he started with the book/system) where he just ripped somebody. I agree with 'Rilla, he is a gentleman until proven otherwise.

The fact that the man and his sytem can cause such debate (and mostly thinking debate if you weed through the attacks) says something....

As a matter of interest, are there any (ex-) beginners who feel they were damaged by AOK's 19-hand strategy? If so it's important to hear their side of things.

Originally Posted by biondino

Actually that's not entirely true either, but I think he is aware that the Aok brand is too precious to soil ...

cynical much?

I've met aok, and his "lighten up, this is fun" thing is prefectly sincere. reading this parody, i knew he would love it, and chime in here with a friendly word.

nice touch: "Pee pee"

Originally Posted by aokrongly

But don't cut and paste content from performpoker and remove the parts of this post that are cut and pasted from the performance poker challenge.

IANAL, but you're allowed to copy/paste a substantial amount of stuff for the purpose of satire/parody without violating copyright.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fair_us...use_and_parody

Originally Posted by LeFou

Originally Posted by biondino

Actually that's not entirely true either, but I think he is aware that the Aok brand is too precious to soil ...

cynical much?

I've met aok, and his "lighten up, this is fun" thing is prefectly sincere. reading this parody, i knew he would love it, and chime in here with a friendly word.

Fair enough - I still think that Aok considers himself a business (maybe that's a getter word than brand though I'm happy with brand too - no negative connotations implied btw) and as such he doesn't want a bad rep among his potential customers. But I didn't mean to imply there was anything insincere or, I dunno, bad about this. I mean most people don't want to be seen as dicks, do they?

(and I am speaking as someone who has ended up with a negative rep in a few internet forums because I get too aggressive and argumentative - though as far as I can tell there are FTRers who think I'm a dick because of a joke I made a year ago about voting republican wtf)

...

Originally Posted by aokrongly

(pick him up and suck his dick) (not an aok original)

nh anyway. Are you coming out to hang sometime?

way to roll with the punches AOK. you seem to take alot of shit on here, and all you do is smile and look the other way.

congrats on being the most level headed person here.

^^^^^ cause i would have blown up by now.

An online gaming outfit called Helix Gaming International beat AOK to the PERFORMANCE POKER brand in 2004.

<whois>
Organization: Helix International Stuart Gordon P.O.Box W608 St.Johns, AN W.I. AG Phone: (268) 481-4400 Fax..: (268) 481-4405 Email: ******@bingomania.com Registrar Name....: Register.com Registrar Whois...: whois.register.com Registrar Homepage: http://www.register.com Domain Name: PERFORMANCEPOKER.COM Created on..............: Fri, Mar 12, 2004 Expires on..............: Mon, Mar 12, 2007 Record last updated on..: Thu, Feb 23, 2006 Administrative Contact: Helix International Stuart Gordon P.O.Box W608 St.Johns, AN W.I. AG Phone: (268) 481-4400 Fax..: (268) 481-4405 Email: ******@bingomania.com Technical Contact, Zone Contact:
</whois>


It isn't his brand to protect.

The name means fuck all, Yakuman (a rose by any other name etc.). Are you really so malicious that you'll spout complete garbage just to get in a dig at Aok (after bafflingly spending your own no doubt precious time researching it)?

I'm surprised you're not on a strike by now.

Originally Posted by biondino

The name means fuck all, Yakuman (a rose by any other name etc.). Are you really so malicious that you'll spout complete garbage just to get in a dig at Aok (after bafflingly spending your own no doubt precious time researching it)?

I'm surprised you're not on a strike by now.

wow calm down there boy. I think you need to take a breath and reread. Didnt seem amazingly malicious to me.

lol ..you rip the one post where yakuman posted only factual information..

hey d-nuts, where do I go to sign up for the challenge?

I have not used AOK's system, but I don't understand why there is a need to ridicule it. As far as I can tell, he has put together a solid system to help out begginers. What the hell is wrong with that? One thing I can say for sure is that a beginner would be 1000x better off using his system than playing typical donk poker. The typical donk newb pays my bills...19 hand poker disciples feed me blinds and an occasional small pot.

You obvisously have not examined Performance Poker in any detail or have a very rudimentary understanding of the game.

Dude... We are still talking about the 10$ NL Tables, not 25$ NL or Tourney or whereever you play. Its for noobs against noobs. Its SAFE, and thats whats important for a fish who's just starting poker.

@djzcko: I dont get it either, why does everyone have to be so horribly offensive about all this. Why cant people just cut Aok some slack...

well my e-penis is bigger than yours..

Originally Posted by djzcko

I have not used AOK's system, but I don't understand why there is a need to ridicule it. As far as I can tell, he has put together a solid system to help out begginers. What the hell is wrong with that? One thing I can say for sure is that a beginner would be 1000x better off using his system than playing typical donk poker. The typical donk newb pays my bills...19 hand poker disciples feed me blinds and an occasional small pot.

I've read of a system, and it's supposedly a winning one on horrible microstakes tables (I certainly believe it), where you push AA/KK preflop as soon as action is on you. You limp 22-QQ and call small raises with those hands, if you hit a set with them, you push on the flop when action is on you, and if you don't hit a set, you check/fold. So using this strategy you would be open-limping your button with QQ and check/folding on a 952r flop. All other hands are auto-folds preflop. This is a strategy where others will steal your blinds and win occasional small pots. As you can see, this isn't really a good argument to use to defend the strategy as a whole.

Originally Posted by hoLy32

Dude... We are still talking about the 10$ NL Tables, not 25$ NL or Tourney or whereever you play. Its for noobs against noobs. Its SAFE, and thats whats important for a fish who's just starting poker.

@djzcko: I dont get it either, why does everyone have to be so horribly offensive about all this. Why cant people just cut Aok some slack...

The problem, in my very humble opinion, is that many members who have played a significant amount of poker (myself included), feel that some of aok's strategy posts are actually extremely detrimental to the overall learning process of how to beat NL ring. I say this for many reasons, perhaps the biggest because of how much he de-emphasizes position, agression, and adaptation. Instead he preaches how position is overrated, playing passive is the way to go, and playing by a system. Which is the exact opposite of what any decent NL ring player will tell you (and for good reason).

Of course, I'm sure others will disagree.

...

He wasn't talking about your system.

...

lol

Originally Posted by mcatdog

He wasn't talking about your system.

this is correct.

Aok,

I was comparing your system to the one I described on the merits that both will have the users of these systems avoiding losses in big pots. In other words, opponents will only win your blinds and small pots against you, in general. The point that I was trying to make was that this doesn't necessarily mean they are good for beginners.

There is one thing that I wanted to point out in your very misguided post, however.

So now you lie about the system and imply that playing it will somehow cripple your future ability to make money. You have no proof.

Likewise, you have no proof that it will make you money either. Feel free to post your 1600 hand sample size at NL25 if you'd like.

Despite my lack of proof, after over a quarter-million hands of playing NL ring, I can say with a very high level of certainty that what I've said thus far in this thread is correct.

...

Agree to disagree?

repost of one of my posts in the other 19 hand thread

Do I believe AOK's system could make money?

Yes

http://www.flopturnriver.com/phpBB2/...oker-39818.htm

These were played using the 19 hand strategy. Its not the biggest sample size in the world, but I would imagine that before they reach 200 table hours people would start developing the experience to grow beyond the 19 hand strategy.

...

I don't understand the point of people continually posting results such as this in response to my statements. Did I ever say that Performance Poker and the 19-hand system could not beat micro stakes? I concede that it can. My criticisms aren't that it can't make money at $25NL, but rather that it has serious shortcomings in helping players move beyond those stakes. If someone would like to address that issue by posting results then please do so at relevant stakes.

so why cant i get free P+P to the uk dnuts?