what do players find is the best way to get the most money out of a set?

whenever i flop a hidden set I like to slow play it if I can - the trouble is I am wary of letting another player draw cheaply to a flush or straight and very often when one of the flop cards matches my pair, there is a possible draw out there. All too often I have slow played (ie not checking but making minimal bets and raises) only to lose to a flush or straight - often with four flush or straight cards falling on the board. It is a tough beat to take but I guess I bring it on myself for trying to slow play.

On the other hand if I have, say, a set of Js, I don't want to make a pot sized bet as I want to make other players think that they are winning with one pair or maybe two pair, or I want to give them a chance to improve slightly. If I bet the pot I may scare them out. I sometimes fall foul of this when I hold two pair - I think I'm winning until someone turns a hidden set which they have slow played.

What I am saying is that every time I flop a set, especially top set (because it is so rare), I want to maximise my chances of getting paid. Of course I accept that every so often I will lose to someone outdrawing me and that the best way to avoid this is to bet large as soon as a draw is possible, but that often means on the flop and subsequently end of hand. Check raising is also a useful tactic, but it usually means winning only one bet.

Any tips?

Also, how do you advise playing trips, ie pair on board which matches one in my hand? If there is a bet and I raise, I'm giving away that I have trips. If there is a bet and a call, a good player will wonder what I am calling with and will put me on the trips. Either way, it is usually the last action I get. Attempting to slow play or check raise doesn't seem to work.