Defence against the Poker Tutors

You're at a table and getting compfy, you have already spotted someone playing way to many hands and playing them badly. You are already planning what you will spend hisher money on when you win it.

Then all of a sudden he catches his inside straight and someone at the table starts talking smack "What the hell are you doing, that was an awful call BLAH BLAH BLAH!".

If this continues most of the time the bad player will leave and take his/her juicy cash with them. DANG you think. (or words to that effect )

Its important when this happens to immediatly hijack the conversation. Even if you have to start arguing with the player who spoke up. Here are a few I use.

"You are a really bad player"
Me : "xxx why don't go find a tougher table ?"
They always answer they prefer to play bad players to this.
Me : "Then don't complain when they draw out on you".

"You are a fXXXXg moron"
Me : Well his (whatever) beat you and he has your money.
This serves two purposes it puts the player closer to tilt (more money) and you automatically get his attention on yourself.

You called with 2 outs / Caught a 2 outer etc...
Me : "Are you giving poker lessons?, can you give me a poker lesson ?"
Keeps the attention off the bad player and onto yourself.

If there nice and you are getting on ok with them.
Me : "Dude chasers are good, you want chasers"
Not as good as the others because its letting the bad player(s) know he is a bad player.

"FS people staying in with junk and out drawing me"
Me : "Why not tell us what you have on the flop and we can fold if you have us beat".

hehe that one always starts a nice chat

The whole purpose is to keep the bad player at the table long enough to take his/her money. Most are recreational players and play for fun. They wont stay if they are getting abused. Take over the conversation as quickly as possible. If you must berate the better player to keep the attention off the bad player.

If the bad player leaves its usually time to look for another table.

If there are two maniac chasers let it slide as you would prefer one to two. If you are playing 2/4 with two maniacs you are no longer playing 2/4 you're playing 4/8.

If you are getting the bad beats on you, its tough ubt try not to give them any crap if you must, just hit them with the sarcasm. "nice call" / "I like the way you turn raised the rivered flush" etc, they will usually reply "thx" not realising you were taking the pi$$.

Hope this helps keeping the educaters away from the weak players at your table.

Great Post.

So true.

Some of the guys I play with are content to play any cards and believe the entire game is solely based on luck. They'll piss their whole stack away calling preflop bets out of position with garbage hands. They'll chase everything.

Then there is one guy I play with who is constantly reminding everyone what the "odds" or "chances" of this or that happening. I keep telling him discreetly that he should just keep his mouth shut and let them believe that luck is all that matters. He just won't sh*t up though.

Very annoying.

Fantastic observation toasty, the only problem is Im usually the one that gets his set trounced by a gutshot straight; and I just feel the need to ventilate, maybe i could buy a cute furry pet and yell at it.

love your avatar!

Originally Posted by scgolfer

love your avatar!

I got tons of em, many aren't quite appropriate for the forums though

Originally Posted by Aceofone

Fantastic observation toasty, the only problem is Im usually the one that gets his set trounced by a gutshot straight; and I just feel the need to ventilate, maybe i could buy a cute furry pet and yell at it.

That's the worst part, these educaters are usually better than average players who know themselves that its good to have these bad players in the game. I do bad beat weightlifting to release the anger and at most will type a little sarcasm.

Once I spot a bad player you can start making a few moves to get there money. Raise more pre flop, your avg hands will beat there trash hands most of the time (If you are in a full ring game then you will have to choose your moments).

Raise more on the flop/turn to try to get heads up with the bad players. You risk getting dealt some bad beats but after a while you will collect your reward.

My favorite wise-crack: "Shhh... I'm busy counting your chips."

Originally Posted by Fnord

My favorite wise-crack: "Shhh... I'm busy counting your chips."

ya know..i've noticed a habit i have. it's pretty rediculous. i used to ventilate through the chat, but figured it was just makin me look like a baby. i have chat disabled now so i don't let other comments bother me. not saying they will, just a preventative measure. anyway, i found that when i'm beatin by a chaser i take my right hand, ball it into a fist, put my left hand (fingers extended) and punch the left hand. kinda stupid...not somethin i intentionally do, just a habit.