OK, in all seriousness dude. If ya made it this far you are stronger than I thought and are lost more than we all thought. You have read the "WHOLE" site, right? You've read the beginner digest, all the strategy columns, all the beginner threads on the first page (no one expects ya to go back to 2004, it just repeats), maybe even bought a book or two and you do have a deposit ready to go to a site and play real money tables. Then come back to here and post an actual question in regards to a specific problem. Then and only then will you see why the sarcasm and humor for what it is, and why your question was such a problem to get an answer to.

AND when they have a thread in the community forum in 2010 and ask what was your first post on FTR you can look back and laugh.

What flomo said.....