new personal mission established. will report back with results. thanks!
edit: oh, my dad also likes coffee and cheese. thoughts?
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new personal mission established. will report back with results. thanks!
edit: oh, my dad also likes coffee and cheese. thoughts?
I could see that with certain cheese. Like the spreadable types of cheeses that you find in the middle of danishes. Take a bite of the danish, than wash it down with coffee-- great combo. But cheddar and coffee? Barf.
Cheese is awesome. I don't eat it nearly eat it enough.
kevin and his fucking gouda
Pft, cooking on the beach could happen if I had a grill or a fire. However, I will be in a kitchen that is very close to the ocean, so, yeah.
Yeeeah - I'm not buying a whole oinker. I do have a cousin that has one of those very large smoker grills, and he's smoked/grilled a whole pig - it was weird. Tasty, but weird looking.
Seriously, y'all - I don't wanna be scrolling pinterest anymore than I already do, that shit is evil.
if a lot of people in this world could magically fall into a black hole that would be great
this is so great to stare at with the lights off when everything gets overwhelming
boost's name isn't tyrone? TIL
Information we know:
There were five people
Bikes and I were two of them
One of the five is named Kevin
Wuf's conclusion:
My name is Kevin, derp.
Boost has been talking about cheese nonstop so when Bikes says "k-dog and his cheese" it's only a logical conclusion
"you want it to be one way, but its the other way"
haha, bikes striking on multiple levels.
Depends on the person I think. I use one periodically through the day and have set times when I have a real cig. I'd like to phase out the real cig but for some reason it's just more enjoyable, comfortable. Mebbe cuz I've been smoking the real deal for a really long time.
what do you guys think about rolled cigarettes. it's like a hipster thing here in NY but in greece that's pretty much all they smoke. personally i much prefer them. harsher/deeper hit, just way more enjoyable overall.
Lots of people in UK roll cigarettes, especially students/hipsters etc. I don't like the taste
I rolled my own for a couple of years. The problem I had with it is I work with my hands and can't just stop working to roll a smoke whenever I want. Pre rolling them helped but turned into a chore. Now I smoke American Spirits (the organic ones). They have a great flavor but are probably the priciest smokes on the market. But everything else pretty much tastes like I'm sucking on an exhaust pipe now.
I prefer to roll my own, much nicer and you can role it to your preference.
rollies > tailor-made cigarettes any day of the week. tailors taste grosssssss
I mix the two. Mainly because I'm too lazy to roll half the time.
BOARDWALK EMPIRE TONIGHT
thread's bringing the filthy smokers out of the woodwork
It's filthy and terribly unhealthy, but it is rather nice.
Savy, tilt.
i quit smoking when i was 19. i smoke very sparingly here in the US, but greece kind of got me back into it. it's seductive there, especially when you know you already like it. :[ but i haven't owned a pack and i don't plan on it ever again. it is really gross, in the long run.
also, on an unrelated note:
http://www.askmen.com/top_10/dating/...-sexually.html
really horrible flirting advice. yes, maybe one or two of these could be effective if you already built up a rapport with a girl and the context is right (and if you execute it more cleverly than his lame ass examples), but as general advice this is all awful and horrible, but most importantly, hilarious. #2 is a gem.
smokin ciggs is gross. is terrible for you and makes everything smell like ass.
Lets be a bit more real here. There are millions of "dangerous" or "potentially life threatening" things humans do every day. The idea that a certain group of people can be openly vilified for doing something relatively safe (compared to say, standing near a busy street) is absurd.
Smoking is awesome. It's empowering. The smell is excellent (unless the tobacco is low-quality). Any long-term health issues are massively overshadowed by short-term benefits.
PLUS, you get to carry a little firey wand, so you can burn people who are judgmental assholes if you are close enough. (c'mon, that's a joke)
Haters gonna hate, sure. So whatev's to that. Seriously, though, what a snobby, boorish hobby to hate on smokers/smoking.
LOL they must have taken it down because it was so awful. goddammit. well, wufwugy can vouch for me that it was ridiculous. in his words: "this is the opposite of right."
number 2 suggested that if a woman is vacuuming, you ask her if she's ovulating, because apparently women vacuum when they're ovulating? and this is supposedly supposed to make her really excited because you, like, know stuff about the female reproductive system. i mean if you know that, what else do you know? nudgenudgewinkwink
the whole thing was soooo wonderful though, it was like an onion article. i'm a little annoyed they caught wind of the fact that it was straight up retarded.
I wanted to see for myself what they were saying but from that example, yeah it really that special kind of bad. No wonder they removed it.
oh i found the cached version. just gonna post it here so it's saved forever and ever.
Number 10
Speak in a sexy way
Think you can turn a woman on with a high-pitched, squeaky voice? Think again. Women pay more attention to your voice tone than to the words you speak. When you flirt with a woman in a sexual way, work on improving your delivery. Speak slowly, hold eye contact, deepen your voice and pause. But be careful not to be overdramatic and cheesy. Think James Bond, not Austin Powers. These style points will help you convey powerful sexual undertones in your communications with women, and will help you quickly build sexual tension.
Number 9
Accuse her of being the aggressor
One the best ways to get the fun started is to accuse a woman of trying to seduce you. For example, if she mentions something about her house, such as, "I just moved into a new place," or, "Do you know how to install a wireless router?," say, "Wow, are you trying to get me to come over to your house already? I'm not surprised though." Women love it when men do this. Don't be surprised if she really tries to get you to come over soon after!
Number 8
Imply that you're a stud
Women want men who know how to please them, but you can't come right out and say, "I'm a great lover." Instead, use sexual innuendo to indirectly convey this message. For example, suppose you're at your place making a drink for a woman and she says, "Wow, you're good at that." Look at her square in the eye and say, "I'm good at a lot of things." She'll get the hint that you're a stud, and she'll be dying to find out more.
Number 7
Have her use you
Women accuse men of using them for sex all the time, so why not turn the tables? The next time you do something considerate for a woman, tell her, "So you're using me already -- next thing I know you'll be trying to use me for other things as well." She'll find this role-reversal hilarious, and it's a great way to bring up the topic of sex in a safe, fun and non-threatening way.
Number 6
Sex up boring conversation
When most men first meet a woman, they ask her typical, boring questions like, "Where are you from?" and "What do you do?" Women usually hate it when guys do this, but you can set yourself apart by using these drab questions to turn things in a sexual direction. For example, if you find out a woman is from Spain, you can say to her, "Hmm... you know what they say about women from Spain, don't you?" Then, let your sly smile and solid eye contact suggest that you know Spanish women are... well, let's just say a lot of fun.
How to sneak sex into everyday chat...
Number 5
Bring sex into everyday chat
A great way to flirt sexually with a woman is to compare some "outside the bedroom" activities to "inside the bedroom" activities. For example, let's suppose you bring a female guest a cup of tea. You can follow by saying, "Looks like you're on the receiving end today. Do you always receive, or do you like to give at times, too?" Crack a slight smile, and she will know exactly what you're talking about.
Number 4
Offer to pay her back
Oftentimes, a woman will do something nice, then tease by saying, "That's okay, you can pay me back later." Why not make the currency sexual? Say something like, "Pay you back... ummm... I'm short on cash right now. Do you have any creative payment options in mind?"
Number 3
Tell her she's naughty
Another fun way to tease a woman in a sexual way is to accuse her of being "naughty" in her everyday activities. For example, if a woman tells you she was just in the shower, ask her how it was. If she gives any positive response, reply with something like, "Nice shower? Interesting. What exactly were you doing in there that made it so nice? I'm curious."
Number 2
Show that you're sex-savvy
Want to know a secret about female sexuality that 99% of men don't know? Here it is: Many women feel compelled to vacuum their house each month when they're ovulating. Some experts believe it has something to do with wanting to "clean the nest" before laying her "egg." So when a woman tells you she is vacuuming, say "Vacuuming? What, are you ovulating or something?" She'll be stunned that you know this, and she'll wonder what else you know about female sexuality. Of course, if she doesn't know what you mean, fill her in. Women love it when you teach them something new, especially about themselves.
Number 1
Find double meanings
The English language is literally packed with words you can twist around to create sexual meanings. Wet, juicy, hard, fast, hot... the possibilities are endless. For example, if she says her drink is big, you can reply with something like "Big can be a good thing, don't you think?" Once you start looking for opportunities, you'll be surprised how easy it is to add a bit of sexuality to everyday conversations.
and just to be clear it's not like i think any iteration of that advice is an automatic fail. obviously everything is relative and contextual and all that good stuff. i just think the article is so misguided and just comes off so cheesy and completely lacking in nuance.
my job is horrible for my 4 cigs a year habit -.- i'm already up to like fucking 22 this year @_@
loooooooolQuote:
Want to know a secret about female sexuality that 99% of men don't know? Here it is: Many women feel compelled to vacuum their house each month when they're ovulating. Some experts believe it has something to do with wanting to "clean the nest" before laying her "egg." So when a woman tells you she is vacuuming, say "Vacuuming? What, are you ovulating or something?" She'll be stunned that you know this, and she'll wonder what else you know about female sexuality. Of course, if she doesn't know what you mean, fill her in. Women love it when you teach them something new, especially about themselves.
Yeah most of these are pretty bad without some good context to make it work. Number 9 is fine (accuse her of being the aggressor), I do this from time to time but depends on what kind of girl you have in front of you. Although I am noticing with my playful style I can get away with more than I would think. Number 3 (tell her she's naughty) is a good idea but the example given is beyond dumb. Christ. Number 2 is the most retarded thing ever.
Number 7 (have her use you) is the interesting one. I could have used this one with this one girl I had a ONS with haha. She still calls me every day so I might still use it :P
ask men about as useful as cosmo
One night stand.
cosmo sex tip #666 “ when he's least expecting it, carve a pentagram in his chest and begin summoning satan
I WAS JUST WATCHING THAT
and loling everywhere
bwa ha ha ha ha
that kid's lightsaber is all floppy
WOBBLY SAUSAGE!
LOL
Fact: I have had 5 jobs since I joined FTR, none of which was being a male prostitute.
Fellow countryman hits 55hr in japan, they gve him a fucking bouquet
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SKHhV5YMrI
mother fuckers that don't do what they said they'd do piss me of.
had brake pads changed late july/early august - we paid for the "best" ones - because we were told they would not squeak, and that's why they had to use those. 3 days later they start squeaking. called place - said we needed this fixed cause we were informed they wouldn't squeak, dude said it'd be fine to go ahead to b-day trip and bring in the car when we had time, they'd fix it free of charge. afterwards it was making a light groaning noise when braking. but, it was very faint and we were told it'd be fine. a week and a half ago the fucking thing starts squeaking again. called the mother fuckers and told them, "this will be the third time we will be there to have the same thing fixed."
so, friday after going to see my therapist we're taking the car up to these mother fuckers, and then going to go see my niece for her b-day.
I'm beyond pissed. I'm so angry I'm at the point of smiling. We're leaving Monday 5am-ish to head to the beach. I'm going to try real hard to not be overly cuntish. To me, if you have someone pay for something because it won't do a thing, and it starts doing the thing, you should fucking pay them for putting up with your bullshit.
In other news - I'm fixing my hair today so it'll be faded back to blonde vs faded lavender/pink/teal. At the beginning of October I'm doing a photoshoot, and I'mma be a broken porcelain doll.
Also - kidney stones are fucking evil. pms is fucking stupid and has no purpose. marghphhahahamp. oh, and i keep getting fucking crazy hungry - the kind of hungry that it hurts, there's no warning, and even after what is a lot of food for me i'm still hungry. wtf.
Breaking Fucking Bad!
i really need to watch this show i got netflix and everything for it but i still havent watched it
If I get laid in the morning I've realised it makes a huge difference to my day. I can deal with anything. I'm not moody going to work, I don't feel grumpy, my whole outlook is positive, my aggression level drops and I'm a generally happy person.
Nice brag post rong.
Lol
You should still be in the honeymoon period and getting some far more frequently than anyone else.
for the past 40 minutes i've been trying to work up the courage to say a simple hello to someone and i just can't fucking do it
one time i had sex right after waking up in the morning and i lost my vision/hearing temporarily because i got so lightheaded. he was pretty proud of himself, but i think i'm just lame.
calling it now.
inb4 chipeaterman
i get a giddy smile on my face when i think about chippy...
http://stream2.gifyo.com/pictures/22...-430168901.gif
terror. they say that terror lies in the deep.
Prince never said "Hello"
http://ottermatic.files.wordpress.co...incehotwtf.gif
:lol:
:x
http://stream2.gifyo.com/pictures/22...-259018999.gif
I CAN'T STOP i might start a mini gif-series
what should i call it
(above gif is pretty accurate representation of what it's like to get to know me. "she seems normal... oh wait.")
oh yeah im about to drive to baltimore, woo
ur a girl?
I NEED TO PEE
AIM FOR OZ
I grew up told Stephen King was a no-talent shocky horror writer. In my teens I read Green Mile. It was kind of amazing. I called King one of the best writers to ever live. His prose flows and his characters are as real as real is. Fast forward over a decade: I haven't read much anything since. I try out several different novels: Vonnegut, Salvatore, GRRM, Jacques, Dumas. Still don't hold a candle to Motherfucking Stephen King. "Shocky horror" genre fiction is a facade. Dude is legit. I read one page and I feel what's going on
Writing, some people seem to think it should be art where as other people just want to convey something.
http://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthough..._overdose_the/
this subreddit is literally the best subreddit.
I know you will finally get the courage to say hello to chippy ;)
http://i.imgur.com/zjfCQV7.gif
I've experienced something similar. No! I didn't get fucked by a dude! One time I was having sex with a beautiful hot woman with perfect ass and tits who looked like Alyssa Milano's twin sister, she shouted: Fuck me hard chippy! You're the best chippy! Suddenly, I lost my vision/hearing temporarily because of the morning sunlight over my head that came through the bedroom's window. I woke up. I was dreaming! :-D
Ty savvy. I may do a naked one just for you.
nooooo savy, y u reveal my esoteric gif making secrets ;_;
Considering all I had to do was to look at the url of the picture and google gifyo to see what it was. Think of this as hacking to help you protect yourself in the future.
Pink suits you aubrey!
http://i.imgur.com/6g9a0ad.gif
LOL awesome
welcome to the cringe thread
Aubrey in yellow is 10x cuter/hotter than Aubrey with hair down gif. I want to know a logical explanation for why this is the case!
There's a metaphysical explanation for that, it's called the chippy giddy smile effect on women. When women maintain a conscious giddy mental connection with chippy, their presence will naturally radiate a certain beauty and undisturbed, inner tranquility. Such females glow, look gorgeous and seem irresistible to those who value goodness. They have an attractor field of loveliness which, likewise, tends to bring out the beauty in other people.
http://i.imgur.com/zjfCQV7.gif
http://i.imgur.com/6g9a0ad.gif
http://i.imgur.com/S5PuVIv.gif
This thread is now the H.M.S Randomness. I am her captain. Put some asymmetric thrust behind this beauty and turn her from "let's fuck" to "get fucked" to "fuck yeah!"
Look at this shit right here
so fucking cringe.