Reasons for taking a break from poker... Lol, please add

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06-28-2005, 01:33 PM
tjp

Reasons for taking a break from poker... Lol, please add

I like to have a research day once a week where I get away from the tables completely, browse ftr more thoroughly and look at what's going on elsewhere. I thought it would be good to start a list of reasons to take a break.

How to tell if you need downtime from poker:

1. you go to bed and you hear the dealing of the party poker cards in your head, chhhhk, chhhhk, chhhhkk...

2. you dream about a hand where someone limped utg with AA and you checked in from the BB with 25o and hit the nut straight on the flop.

3. you are forced to replay your last 100 hands in your head while trying to sleep after smoking 12 fat ones to avoid such a situation.

4. your dreams are interspersed with a small man wearing a stasi uniform (party poker table top right player)

5. You wake up screaming thinking you are still playing and have tried a bluff against a rock with an all in on the flop holding ducks with a board full of overs and he has the goods.

lol, please add
06-28-2005, 01:43 PM
Muxy

You teach your kids how to count

One
Two
Three
Four of spades
Five.
06-28-2005, 01:50 PM
BoondockSaint

Quote:

1. you go to bed and you hear the dealing of the party poker cards in your head, chhhhk, chhhhk, chhhhkk...

i know all about this - thats why i hate playing long sessions and going straight to bed cause u dream about the shit all night long - not really good or bad just annoying as hell
06-28-2005, 02:36 PM
Estrop

When I close my eyes, all I see is cards.
06-28-2005, 02:44 PM

You feel that the number that comes after 10 is Jack.

(By the way, nice to have another Chelsea fan here :D).
06-28-2005, 03:02 PM
tjp

Number 6. Your family sees you for the first time in 6 weeks and the children say "mummy, it's the poker man!"
06-28-2005, 03:39 PM
Muxy

Number 7: When something goes the wrong way you yell. Bad Beat!
Number 8: When your done havign sex with your wife you say, +EV!

I will think of some ore i have to go get my hair cut,
06-28-2005, 04:20 PM
BoondockSaint

Well this isnt like a funny one - it actually fuckin sucked and was the worst week of probably my entire life. All last week I didnt play a single hand because the whole back of my left leg was covered in poison ivy and I had to get on 2 different steroids before finally getting rid of it. It felt like skinning my leg was next best alternative but luckily the steroids worked.
06-28-2005, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BoondockSaint

Well this isnt like a funny one - it actually fuckin sucked and was the worst week of probably my entire life. All last week I didnt play a single hand because the whole back of my left leg was covered in poison ivy and I had to get on 2 different steroids before finally getting rid of it. It felt like skinning my leg was next best alternative but luckily the steroids worked.

Ouch.

Diseased leg = -EV.
06-28-2005, 04:23 PM
a500lbgorilla

Quote:

Originally Posted by BoondockSaint

Well this isnt like a funny one - it actually fuckin sucked and was the worst week of probably my entire life. All last week I didnt play a single hand because the whole back of my left leg was covered in poison ivy and I had to get on 2 different steroids before finally getting rid of it. It felt like skinning my leg was next best alternative but luckily the steroids worked.

Steroids, what can't they do?

-'rilla
06-28-2005, 04:34 PM
tjp

rilla, they can't grow back the sole of my foot and the two toes lost in a motorbike accident lol!
06-28-2005, 05:09 PM
bencathers

I wonder if the steroids improved your game afterwards.... first the steroid controversy in baseball, now in poker. Mandatory drug tests anyone?
06-28-2005, 05:09 PM
ville18

When your belly button explodes in the middle of your session, sit out.
06-28-2005, 05:22 PM
storm75m

Reasons you know you need to take a break...

-Your grass is dead, (or way overgrown) your car has "wash me" written in five different places, and you're completely out of breath after running down the basketball court two times.

-You start looking like Tom Hanks in Cast Away cause you haven't shaved or cut your hair, or it's 6:00 (p.m.) on Sunday afternoon and you still haven't brushed your teeth.

-You actually turn down sex cause you're in the middle of a tournament. (I've actually had the laptop nearby with the post and fold option, but everytime it would ding I would glance over and make sure I didn't have aces or kings)

-You see some random numbers 86594 and think "gutshot"

-The dreaming stuff is annoying as hell too.
06-28-2005, 05:27 PM
BoondockSaint

damn tjp - your situation is definitely worse. Sorry to hear about all that. I kept thinking it can always be and get worse. Hope your toes grow back.
06-28-2005, 05:51 PM
Theeggman

License plates read like FTR posts:

1PFR550
5OES467
4ITM320
06-28-2005, 07:07 PM
tjp

storm, lmfao
06-28-2005, 07:26 PM
storm75m

Quote:

Originally Posted by tjp

storm, lmfao

yeah, don't get me started, i obviously need a break...

When it's a "tough decision" whether or not to play your pocket kings or...

-rush to the hospital cause you're wife's water just broke
-see what the loud crash was in the bedroom and why the baby is bawling
-clean up the disgusting warm baby vomit that is running down your chest and arm that is causing you to repeatedly gag, when you're on the bubble of a big SNG (ought to put something in Tales of Poker on that one)
-when you can successfully play poker on the laptop while doing dishes, eating, cooking, taking a shit, rolling a joint, or giving the baby a bath

I got more, I'm sure, let me ask the wifey.
06-28-2005, 07:45 PM
tjp

storm stop it i'm going to shit myself with laughter.

Grinning like a wanking monkey! :lol:
06-30-2005, 09:43 PM
UncleBuddy

Re: Reasons for taking a break from poker... Lol, please add

Quote:

Originally Posted by tjp

1. you go to bed and you hear the dealing of the party poker cards in your head, chhhhk, chhhhk, chhhhkk...

I changed the chhhk sound to one of a cat meowing

Now when I play poker, it sounds like my cat is in heat.
06-30-2005, 10:24 PM
TylerK

"my phone number? five-five-five four-trey-deuce-ace"
07-01-2005, 11:49 AM
stewartkev

It's time to take a break from FTR when two members appear in two separate dreams. As happened to me last night :shock: , one as a supermarket checkout person and the other I was playing HU in a tournament. I need a life.

The guilty shall remain nameless!
07-01-2005, 12:15 PM
a500lbgorilla

You sign your checks "-'rilla"

-'rilla
07-01-2005, 12:50 PM
Robert Tiltin'

You need to take a break when you stay in on 4th of July because you get your fill of fireworks from the awful Party Poker "CONGRATULATIONS" thing.
07-01-2005, 12:52 PM
Robert Tiltin'

You need to take a break when you wind up saying "but I had a TON of OUTS!!" as an excuse to get out of a speeding ticket.
07-01-2005, 12:53 PM
Robert Tiltin'

You need to take a break when you start sliding dollar bills under your monitor to tip the e-dealer.
07-01-2005, 12:56 PM
Robert Tiltin'

You need to take a break when you've been running a 48 hour non-stop session and you smell like you have a hoagie in a headlock.
07-01-2005, 05:03 PM
Greedo017

Quote:

Originally Posted by storm75m

When it's a "tough decision" whether or not to play your pocket kings or...

-rush to the hospital cause you're wife's water just broke
-see what the loud crash was in the bedroom and why the baby is bawling
-clean up the disgusting warm baby vomit that is running down your chest and arm that is causing you to repeatedly gag, when you're on the bubble of a big SNG (ought to put something in Tales of Poker on that one)
-when you can successfully play poker on the laptop while doing dishes, eating, cooking, taking a shit, rolling a joint, or giving the baby a bath

wow, i almost don't believe this one.... there are more important things in life than taking care of your wife and children. the baby is gonna come out sometime anyway, the kings are now!