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Shit before Shower

View Poll Results: Poo than shower

Voters
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  • I work too hard to waste valuable toilet paper

    4 23.53%
  • I prefer not to touch my own poo

    5 29.41%
  • wtf who r u

    8 47.06%
Results 1 to 33 of 33
  1. #1

    Default Shit before Shower

    You take a large juicy kerplunk into your toilet directly before you shower.
    What next?
    I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.
    -Thomas Jefferson

    Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
    -Thomas Edison
  2. #2
    BooG690's Avatar
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    I fucking wipe you fucking animal.
    That's how winners play; we convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.
  3. #3
    BankItDrew's Avatar
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    Wipe.

    I don't want to get poop on my loofah.
  4. #4
    may i just say that you are being completely illogical
    also i am so fucked up right now
    I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.
    -Thomas Jefferson

    Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
    -Thomas Edison
  5. #5
    Wiping seems so much easier than the paranoia of washing my legs fifteen times for fear of poowater leaving trails trickling down them
  6. #6
    shit -> wipe -> shower
  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by JoeHaw View Post
    may i just say that you are being completely illogical
    also i am so fucked up right now
    Not illogical. Sometimes unwiped poo can feel all squiggy, and since when I shower I clean my ass last it would mean a time of relaxation is hindered by discomfort and ew
  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Hawk View Post
    shower -> wipe -> shit
    IMO
  9. #9
    BooG690's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawk View Post
    shit -> wipe -> shower
    +1
    That's how winners play; we convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.
  10. #10
    okay what irf hero jacks off preflop as opposed to shitting?
    I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.
    -Thomas Jefferson

    Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
    -Thomas Edison
  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by JoeHaw View Post
    okay what irf hero jacks off preflop as opposed to shitting?
    Then I must wonder why hero wasted splooge on the toilet instead of on some big tit porn
  12. #12
    the only time shitting without wiping and going directly to the shower is acceptable is if you have no toilet paper
  13. #13
    bikes's Avatar
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    Shit -> Wipe -> Air Freshener -> Shower

    ?wut
  14. #14
    Have a dump. Long soak in the bath. Wipe your arse on the towel. Ido.
  15. #15
    shit, wipe, shower. seems fairly obvious really.
  16. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by BooG690 View Post
    I fucking wipe you fucking animal.
    this


  17. #17
    I wipe, but only half as well as I normally would.

    balance friends, balance.
  18. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer View Post
    I wipe, but only half as well as I normally would.

    balance friends, balance.
    Ok, I'll give you 80-90%, but not half...


  19. #19
    Jack Sawyer's Avatar
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    Cogito ergo sum

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    Hey, I'm in a movie!
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  20. #20
    bikes's Avatar
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    1:42pm] [lulbikes] thank fucking god for wesstern technology
    [11:43pm] [lulbikes] for brilliant inventions such as toliet paper
    [11:43pm] [lulbikes] and toliets where u dont have to fucking squat when like its 2000bc
    [11:45pm] [lulbikes] god no wonder indian food makes me sick
    [11:45pm] [lulbikes] HOW IS THIS A CLEAN METHOD????

    ?wut
  21. #21
    swiggidy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UG View Post
    Ok, I'll give you 80-90%, but not half...
    I'm going with 75%. The paper is def not white on the last wipe.
    (\__/)
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")
  22. #22
    surely finding the optimal number is a simple matter of optimization with input parameters of (bustoFactor, hippyFactor, prudeFactor).

    Someone bust out some fucking equations and graphs and get on this shit. (pun intended)
  23. #23
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
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    Shit after shower then out to nightclubs. Living life on hard mode.
    <a href=http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png target=_blank>http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png</a>
  24. #24
    i often realize i need to shit only after i've showered, and think briefly about what a shame that is.
  25. #25
    oskar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawk View Post
    shit -> wipe -> shower
    quite obvious choice.

    Quote Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla View Post
    Shit after shower then out to nightclubs. Living life on hard mode.
    lol

    I absolutely hate not being able to take a shower after I poop. Even if I just took a shower, I will at least wash my ass.
    I am not entirely convinced by the indian method. The absence of toilet paper means you have to leave the toilet with a wet asshole, unless you use the hand towel. Which I would suspect some will do.

    I am not comfortable with this.
    The strengh of a hero is defined by the weakness of his villains.
  26. #26
    I've heard of people carrying around baby-wipes to ensure maximum cleanliness.

    They're closer to the crazy end of the spectrum (that shits only at home and showers immediately after) than most, but I get it, I get it...
  27. #27
    Quote Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla View Post
    Shit after shower then out to nightclubs. Living life on hard mode.
    no wipe?
  28. #28
    Quote Originally Posted by Keith View Post
    no wipe?
    only if you're a pussy
    [00:29] <daven> dc, why not check turn behind
    [00:30] <DC> daven
    [00:30] <DC> on my hand?
    [00:30] <daven> yep
    [00:30] <DC> because I am drunk
    [00:30] <daven> nice reason
    [00:30] <daven> no further questions
    [00:30] <yaawn> ^^Lol

    Problem officer...?
  29. #29
    hmm lets see:

    shit -> pee -> masturbate -> lick it up till clean -> shower your tongue

    and for those who cannot reach testicles + anus with his/her tongue:

    shit -> pee -> masturbate -> lick your hands then use them to wipe ass (rinse and repeat) -> shower your tongue (hands are clean, you licked them)
  30. #30


    Quote Originally Posted by Nekrogovner View Post
    hmm lets see:

    shit -> pee -> masturbate -> lick it up till clean -> shower your tongue

    and for those who cannot reach testicles + anus with his/her tongue:

    shit -> pee -> masturbate -> lick your hands then use them to wipe ass (rinse and repeat) -> shower your tongue (hands are clean, you licked them)
  31. #31
    Galapogos's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donachello View Post
    only if you're a pussy
    If you meant this on the level I thought you did, then thumbs up to you.

    Edit: wait, if you meant it on that level the joke I thoguht you meant makes no sense. nm
    Last edited by Galapogos; 07-17-2011 at 05:26 PM.


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  32. #32
    Quote Originally Posted by Galapogos View Post
    If you meant this on the level I thought you did, then thumbs up to you.

    Edit: wait, if you meant it on that level the joke I thoguht you meant makes no sense. nm
    so would you say thumbs down to him?
  33. #33
    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer View Post
    I've heard of people carrying around baby-wipes to ensure maximum cleanliness.

    They're closer to the crazy end of the spectrum (that shits only at home and showers immediately after) than most, but I get it, I get it...
    dude.. baby wipes are amazing. I'm not a fanatic. I don't carry them around with me. But if they are there, oh my.. what a wonderful day it is. In a pinch, when the consistency is all off and it just wants to smear everywhere, I'll dampen the tissue to simulate baby wipes.


    As far as Eastern method vs Western... I think your asshole is def cleaner with the Eastern method, and where this is practiced it doesn't matter that your butt is wet, cuz it's so humid there, it would be wet from sweat in no time. The problem though is that your hand comes in direct contact with feces, and then there is not adequate facilities to make sure your hands are clean when you leave the facilities or that the facilities themselves are clean. Using bar soap with the Eastern method seems like an obvious downfall. That being said, the fact that your hand comes in direct contact with shit, may in fact make for a cleaner populace on average seeing as washing after shitting will be compulsive, whereas I know a ton of Westerners drop deuces and don't wash up afterwards.


    Btw, why is the issue that your hand will be dirty if you don't wipe between the shit and shower? The issue should be that you are introducing quantities of fecal matter into your bathtub/shower. At least if you piss in the shower it is sterile... Poo in the shower/tub is just downright gross.

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