"So if i gave you like, i dont know--$100, could you...

[gabe]

i forget who ive talked with this about. i'm not sure if it was here or not but ill post it anyway.

"so if i give you $100, you could turn it in to $200?? could you do that for me???""

ive gotten these question too many times. people find out i play poker and make money, then they ask this. they think i want to work off their money and give them all profit. i need a good answer. ive just been saying "wow i get asked that alot," but thats not a very clever response.

mods dont move to poker etc plz

[elipsesjeff]

Haha, "how about you give me 10k and properly stake me, then i'll give you a percentage"

Not very clever, but its better than, "How about you give me $100, then I'll give you back $100.10 because thats the % of bankroll you're giving me compared to my earnings."

...dumbasses lol

[gabe]

yea my roommate even gets asked this and he plays $10NL with a $15 bankroll

[zook]

Ask them for a $100 bill, take a sharpie and write 2's over the the 1's.

[Warpe]

Tell them you can double anybody's money...ask for a bill, then fold it in half.

[Trikflow77]

god i hate it when people do this to me.......i always asks them where they work.....oh you wait tables at chilis? How bout i take your shift tonight and keep all your tips?....and oh wait, why dont you work for me then give me your tips......deal?

[swiggidy]

why dont you work then give me your tips......deal?

I like this

"so if i give you $100, you could turn it in to $200?? could you do that for me???""

Yes, I could, but I'm not going to.

[boost]

whats wrong with "EAT BUGS"?

[ilikeaces86]

Just say you already have plenty of money of your own to use from all your winnings. They will understand this.

[chardrian]

haha - the secretaries in my office are pooling their money for some lottery and just asked me how much I could make with their combined pool (like $20).

[theDEEPdish]

tell them you'll try but your just as likely to loose it for them, if they still want you to then tell them that you don't really want that responsibility

[thenonsequitur]

tell them you'll try but your just as likely to loose it for them, if they still want you to then tell them that you don't really want that responsibility

A long time ago a friend offered me a deal with the terms:

* He gives me $1000.
* I play for 100 hours.
* At then end of this period, if I have turned this money into >$1200, I give him $1200 and keep the rest.
* At the end of this period, if I have lost money or have otherwise not turned this into >$1200, I give him everything I have left.
* So if I lose it all I owe him nothing.

This was a good deal. Basically a freeroll. I accepted but then he backed out before giving me the $1000 when he found out I sucked at poker.

[theDEEPdish]

so he only wanted you to make 200 dollars for him?

[chardrian]

a 20% return is usually thought of as a good investment.

[Xianti]

Just tell them to learn to be a baller like you and stop asking for handouts.

[Miffed22001]

tell em to bet it all on red and pray

[DaNutsInYoEye]

How about you just not tell people how much money you make playing poker. That way they won't even think to ask you stupid shit like that. You reap what you sow. I make it a point not to tell people I know how much money I make and, interestingly enough, they don't approach me with questions like that.

[Lukie]

:2 quick laughs:, :evil grin:, :eye roll:, :head tilt:, "riight".

Seems like pretty standard shit. When they start being persistent little parasites, thats when you have to put the hammer down.

[euphoricism]

How about you just not tell people how much money you make playing poker. That way they won't even think to ask you stupid shit like that. You reap what you sow. I make it a point not to tell people I know how much money I make and, interestingly enough, they don't approach me with questions like that.

QFT. Its an all-around bad idea to openly reveal how much money you make playing poker.

[Xianti]

But then, how is gabe supposed to show his peeps what a baller he is?

[wufwugy]

i prefer to tell them im down $1600.

then ask them for a loan.

[TerryToma]

i love this thread.

i think the best response is still out there..

[gabe]

How about you just not tell people how much money you make playing poker. That way they won't even think to ask you stupid shit like that. You reap what you sow. I make it a point not to tell people I know how much money I make and, interestingly enough, they don't approach me with questions like that.

i might act cocky on boards (thats what people tell me), but the situations it has come up in real life its never me bringing it up. like my closer friends know because they see me buy nice stuff, so sometimes when i meet new people they will mention that i play poker. also my relatives found out when i bought a new car and my mom told them. thats when i think every uncle i have asked me this question.

[gabe]

i prefer to tell them im down $1600.

then ask them for a loan.

i might use this.....'actually i lost it all, how your dad doing?' or something

[TerryToma]

i dont make all that much $ compared to you balla's but im always completely honest with people. i have a burning desire to teach my friends.. it also keeps people off my back about going broke.


speaking of which---gabe have you ever taught any of your friends to be balla's?

[bigred]

hE'S GOING TO TEACH ME

[gabe]

yea im working on it, they want all the glory without the hard work though. cant have it like that.

[TerryToma]

yea im working on it, they want all the glory without the hard work though. cant have it like that.

waste of time then? i ran in to the same thing, guy got a bunch of bad beats playing real tight and now went back to spending all day playing WoW.. i told him he could be making $$ playing a game..

[flomo]

gabe
start with the fine print of investing in a stock
you know the crap where they start of fsayying how much you wiil make by buy ther shit and then throw in the finne print at the end


what the miovie
the sting

have a few people give you money cheap and pay them
and then take abig investement from a choad say $50, ooo
and give thim the fine print

i don't know what happened ji lost it all
bad beats

wakyy to much booze
good nigt

[gabe]

ha nice

[arkana]

Just say: "Probably, but why would I want to?"

If they say something along the lines of you doing them a favour then just say: "Oh yeah that reminds me, i need someone to do my homework for me - you up for that?"

quid pro quo

[boost]

I go to thsi home game on sundays sometimes now. Its my brothers freinds that host it. I forgot to take money out of party becaues Ive just been sitting at home grinding. I only had enough for the first game. Everyone wants to play a second game and I tell him to spot me the 40 or 50$. Hes like "ok yah but if you win you gotta give me half" LOL!? Im asking you to give me 40 or 50$ to borrow, not as a stake. I have the money, I just forgot to make it accessable.


As far as telling people how much you make, I dont really do this either. I told one freind when I was really drunk and he was questioning me about my 'gambling problem.' He always acted different towards me since that night. I made him promise to not tell anyone, yet from the way other freinds treat me sometimes Im pretty sure he did tell others.

[kevster]

"so if i give you $100, you could turn it in to $200?? could you do that for me???"

Response 1. Sure, but it will take me x hours and you'll need to pay me $x per hour as it's time that I can't win money for myself.

Response 2. Yep, I'm one of those morons that works for free.

Response 3. No

[thenonsequitur]

"so if i give you $100, you could turn it in to $200?? could you do that for me???"

Response 1. Sure, but it will take me x hours and you'll need to pay me $x per hour as it's time that I can't win money for myself.

Response 2. Yep, I'm one of those morons that works for free.

Response 3. No

Hmm....I like response 1 already.

Q: If I give you $100 can you turn it into $200 for me?

A: Sure, but it will take me 5 hours and you'll need to be pay me $25 per hour since it's time that I can't win money for myself. So let's see...you give me $100. Then pay me $125 for my making-money efforts. Then I'll just hang out for 5 hours and then give your original $100 back plus $100 of the $125 that I just "made". Sounds like a deal.

[shysti]

yea im working on it, they want all the glory without the hard work though. cant have it like that.

teach me please, I want all the hard work fuck the glory

[Galapogos]

gabe
start with the fine print of investing in a stock
you know the crap where they start of fsayying how much you wiil make by buy ther shit and then throw in the finne print at the end


what the miovie
the sting

have a few people give you money cheap and pay them
and then take abig investement from a choad say $50, ooo
and give thim the fine print

i don't know what happened ji lost it all
bad beats

wakyy to much booze
good nigt

The only part I understood was way too much booze. Easily one of my favorite rambling drunk posts though. haha

[Bmxicle]

I have never been asked that, but i get asked how to count cards all the time.

[bigred]

I have never been asked that, but i get asked how to count cards all the time.

You have to be a winning player first, bmx. Maybe one day.

[Bmxicle]

oh i forgot

Though seriously i avoid telling people about poker like the plague so that MAY have something to do with it.

[bigred]

wufwugy has been here since 2006?

[Ragnar4]

I would ask them "Well what would my cut be" and then I would argue with them for some ridiculously high percentage cut. Until they gave up

[mbiz]

yes i can do that for you

wheres my 200?

i lost it

[KoRnholio]

yes i can do that for you

wheres my 200?

I ran it up to 500

and then i lost it

FYP. Show them what tilt is all about

[swiggidy]

But how much did you lose?

[aka_red]

id just tell them to get a job. or ask them 'why?' then proceed to ream them

[oskar]

"I'm bust, could you ship me another $10" - that's the only poker related question I get irl.

But then I don't tell random people that I play poker... mainly because I don't want to answer retarded questions.

[bikes]

I don't know how random people find out I play poker for a living. It's really weird when I go to parties that I only know like 3 people and somehow the entire f party knows.

[Stacks]

"So... Is it like, ya know... Real money?"

[dranger7070]

lol ^^^this