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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
What happened at the last Ramadan feast you were at?
I felt like a voyeur of sorts. It was def. a weird event to be invited into, but I was. Everyone knew I was a non-Muslim, and everyone was inviting and sociable.
It all started about 45 minutes before sundown. Sundown is when the day's fast is over, and they go by the official time of sunset posted in the newspaper.
First, we took off our shoes and met in the cafeteria. There were women preparing food, but only bottled water was being served. Everyone said their hellos and social stuff, then the men and women split into separate groups. I went with the men, obv.
There was a religious ceremony, complete with the kneeling and bowing and reciting the ... I don't know what it's called... Allahu Ackbar prayer. It's basically the Muslim version of the procession of Faith in a Catholic mass. IDK if other Christians do this. This was in Arabic, but the rest was in English. There was a sermon portion of the ceremony that was FAR more laid back than any Catholic sermon, in which the ... imam?... encouraged everyone to be wholesome people, avoid aggressive thoughts and try to make the best of being a misunderstood minority. It was a small enough event, ~20 people or so, that there was a Q&A with the imam from the ... parishioners?... I don't remember the exact questions, but the theme was about how to explain being a Muslim to non-Muslim people.
I sat quietly and didn't participate at all. I felt like it would have been an interruption, but in retrospect, I doubt it would have.
After the ceremony was over - it took all of about 20 minutes - we went back to the cafeteria. The women arrived shortly after we did and began laying out buffet trays of food. People got their food and went to sit at the tables, but no one ate anything. It was amusing to see that everyone was not-so-casually eyeing the clock in the room. The women came out of the kitchen and got their own food and sat down with everyone else. There was a collective crunch of eating all at the exact moment. It was funny to me.
The food was OK. Vegetarian, and not too spicey. I suppose if I hadn't eaten all day, it would have tasted better.
Afterward everyone hung out for a couple of hours. Spirits were high. People were laughing now and then. The genders weren't separated beyond the work and religious ceremonies. I asked why they didn't share the same ceremonies and they told me that the ceremonies were the same, but the Q&A is standard and men and women face different challenges and don't need to complicate things with sexuality. They said that men and women alike felt more open to talk about their struggles when the groups were divided.
We talked for a while. I was an ersatz spokesman for American ignorance. I don't remember all the finer details of our conversation, but I remember that everything I thought I knew about Muslim culture was wrong. I had failed to ever visualize the daily lives of Muslim families. I failed to see that their culture, whatever the system of societal structure, is dramatically different, but not oppressive to anyone. All of the women emphatically told me that they were not oppressed, but that they felt very free to be women and proud to play the role. They said their religion is rich with symbolism and that is of great comfort to them. They said the greater sense of community was vital to their personal inner strength.
All the same kind of stuff that Christians say about their faith. None of it really makes sense to me, but at the end of the day, it's all honest, fallible people trying to make the world a livable place.
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