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  1. #76
    I'm closer to 50 than I am to 40. Ya - you guys ARE young.
    Once all-in and called, you are simply at the mercy of the cards.
  2. #77
    Quote Originally Posted by courtiebee
    I'm band camp queen...
    TheXianti: (Triptanes) why are you not a thinking person?
  3. #78
    I'm scared of getting on down traveling esculators since my grandmother pushed me down one when I was about 8 cause I was too slow getting on it
  4. #79
    When I was younger I was a pretty good bowler. I carried a 207 average at age 14. I was state champion of Kansas a few times and was ranked nationally in my age division (12-15).

    I was a self-taught guy. I only had one ball (I had buddies I bowled with that had a ball for every single lane condition imagineable), and I didn't even own my own pair of shoes (I used house shoes). I only bowled on Saturdays and didn't practice. I loved it, but I loved baseball more and when Saturday practices came around for high school baseball I quit bowling...

    I went on to have a pretty successful high school and college baseball career. I bowl maybe twice a year now, and it usually involves drunken schinanigans, but I'm still pretty good. Last game I bowled was a 243 or something...


    P.S. The school I teach at will have a boys and girls bowling team next year for the first time, and I'm going to be the head coach, LOL.


  5. #80
    Quote Originally Posted by Knytestorme
    I'm scared of getting on down traveling esculators since my grandmother pushed me down one when I was about 8 cause I was too slow getting on it
    Quote Originally Posted by Fnord View Post
    Why poker fucks with our heads: it's the master that beats you for bringing in the paper, then gives you a milkbone for peeing on the carpet.

    blog: http://donkeybrainspoker.com/


    Watch me stream $200 hyper HU and $100 Spins on Twitch!
  6. #81
    Yeah, I know...and I mean esculators (think they might be called travelators in the US, don't mean an elevator)

    They are freaky things, need to wait for the right time to step on but usually means letting about 10 steps actually go before I am feeling the timing....yeah, I'm scarred
  7. #82
    Damn George! And I thought my high score of 225 was hot shit. So you use spin, a glove and all that? I was a wannabe bowler for awhile in college. Mainly b/c it was the only official intermural sport I could play and drink beer at the same time. I even used to go the lane by myself to practice. But I never go beyond using a lane ball and never used spin
  8. #83
    bigred's Avatar
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    I admit to being in a musical and no one makes fun of me. WTF is going on here.
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  9. #84
    lolzzz_321's Avatar
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    I'm adopted, eagle scout, and I was in a commercial when I was little.
  10. #85
    Quote Originally Posted by Triptan3s
    I'm adopted, and I was in a commercial when I was little.
    so they saw you as an investment... now I understand why they are so upset with you dropping out...


    btw is the sister adopted to? blood? if not, have you hit that? kinda kinky, but god coudlnt really hate, yanoe?
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  11. #86
    lol omg boost
    Quote Originally Posted by Fnord View Post
    Why poker fucks with our heads: it's the master that beats you for bringing in the paper, then gives you a milkbone for peeing on the carpet.

    blog: http://donkeybrainspoker.com/


    Watch me stream $200 hyper HU and $100 Spins on Twitch!
  12. #87
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    Haha I had a friend who boned his stepsister. I tried to too, once, but it didn't work out (his stepsister, not mine, I don't have one).
  13. #88
    Quote Originally Posted by biondino
    Haha I had a friend who boned his stepsister. I tried to too, once, but it didn't work out (his stepsister, not mine, I don't have one).
    lol if you didn't include the paren's that is def what i would have thought
  14. #89
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    Alright alright. I was a baby-model.
    <Staxalax> Honestly, #flopturnriver is the one thing that has improved my game the most.
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  15. #90
    chardrian's Avatar
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    Hmmmmmmmm...

    I am 6'4 or 6'5 depending on when you ask.

    I can play Mary Had a Little Lamb on my teeth.

    I was born in Nigeria.

    I castrated pigs in Guatemala as a Peace Corps volunteer.

    I got stuck in a revolving door when I was a kid.

    I don't have a spleen (Peace Corps related, but nothing to do with castrating pigs).

    A juror called me a smartass yesterday but I still won the trial.
    http://chardrian.blogspot.com
    come check out my training videos at pokerpwnage.com
  16. #91
    Quote Originally Posted by zook
    Damn George! And I thought my high score of 225 was hot shit. So you use spin, a glove and all that? I was a wannabe bowler for awhile in college. Mainly b/c it was the only official intermural sport I could play and drink beer at the same time. I even used to go the lane by myself to practice. But I never go beyond using a lane ball and never used spin
    Yeah I use "spin," lol. It's actually called a hook, but whatevs.

    My ball is drilled so I have a finger-tip grip, which allows the ball to roll off of your middle and ring fingers last, causing the ball to rotate more which causes it to hook as it "grips" the lane. House balls, on the other hand, are generally drilled for a "standard" grip, where the thumb and middle/ring fingers all come out at the same time. This doesn't allow for you to put much of a rotation on the ball, causing it not to hook as much.

    To get the same result with a house ball you can just remove your thumb (and use a lighter ball), but you lose lots of control without the use of your thumb...


  17. #92
    I played tournament volleyball (beach and indoor) for about 6 years

    My oldest son (19 years old) is adopted
    Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
  18. #93
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    hey i was captain of our HS volleyball team. Good times. Never did play beach though.
    <Staxalax> Honestly, #flopturnriver is the one thing that has improved my game the most.
    Directions to join the #flopturnriver Internet Relay Chat - Come chat with us!
  19. #94
    Quote Originally Posted by courtiebee
    lol omg boost
    hah, drunken posting ftw!
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  20. #95
    Quote Originally Posted by drmcboy
    the only cheese I will eat is on pizza (which is my favorite food). I also avoid most white food - no mayo, tartar sauce, sour cream, etc. However, I drink lots of milk and vanilla is my favorite ice cream flavor.
    Man, this pretty much describes me perfectly, minus the tartar sauce. I also don't like dressing on salads.

    Also, I'm asian (Japanese), and afraid of heights. For example, I'm fine on airplanes or in tall buildings, but in open air places like a balcony I will get queasy and tend to stay away from the rail.
  21. #96
    I am the terror that flaps in the night.

    I am the fingernails that scratch the chalkboard of your soul.

    I am the batteries not included.

    Honestly though... I can drink 2 8oz beers in under 2 seconds, and I've done the rubiks cube in under 35 seconds (with my hands though).

    Oh... and 'Rilla is my father.

    Darkwing Duck
  22. #97
    Miffed22001's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kevster
    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    i played football against Wayne rooney while playing for sheffield united youth academy.
    This rocks pretty hard Miffed. How old were you? I presume it was blindingly obvious how good he was / might be?

    I've met Alex James (Blur), Mani (Stone Roses/Primal Scream) and Andy Rourke (Smiths). Some sort of weird bass player thing even though I play guitar.
    i was 17, we were told when we lined up that some 15 year old kid was playing for everton and that he was supposed to be hot.

    i wouldnt lie if i said he was awesome even being 2 years younger than me, although i had obvious physical edges being a couple years older. I just remember that i was a big kid, stocky etc but rooney was bigger.

    I thought id add, i am not scared of anything in the world other than heights. I am so scared of flying that if i qualified for the WSOP id probably send my g/f to play for me and hope she luckboxxed the FT.
  23. #98
    koolmoe's Avatar
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    When I was a kid, there was a large drainage ditch in our neighborhood. It was probably 8-10 feet deep and almost always had a small amount of water (6-12 inches in depth) flowing in it.

    My best friend had to scoop the dog poop out of his backyard before his dad mowed the lawn. He always scooped it into a large kraft paper grocery bag, and his mom would make him dispose of the poop near the drainage ditch. One time, he threw the bag into the water, and we discovered that it would float for quite a long time before the integrity of the bag was compromised and the bag sank. From that day forward we often made a game of setting the bags of poop on fire and floating them down the drainage ditch river.
    Poker is freedom
  24. #99
    Quote Originally Posted by koolmoe
    When I was a kid, there was a large drainage ditch in our neighborhood. It was probably 8-10 feet deep and almost always had a small amount of water (6-12 inches in depth) flowing in it.

    My best friend had to scoop the dog poop out of his backyard before his dad mowed the lawn. He always scooped it into a large kraft paper grocery bag, and his mom would make him dispose of the poop near the drainage ditch. One time, he threw the bag into the water, and we discovered that it would float for quite a long time before the integrity of the bag was compromised and the bag sank. From that day forward we often made a game of setting the bags of poop on fire and floating them down the drainage ditch river.
    Dang, I was hoping this was going to be one of those "I fell and was stuck in the sewer for 20 hours before I was discovered" stories. But still sounds like fun.
  25. #100
    Once as a kid me and friends had a game of hide and chase down ina wooded place at the end of my road. One friend spotted me and gave chase. As i turned around with super quick kid like ability, a branch off a tree pierced the skin of my face and went into a spot between my eyeball and eyesocket. I turned my head downward breaking the branch and ran home with a stick in my face. blood pouring down my face. Mam took me to the bathroom and got my bro to get a neighbour (who wasnt a medic or anythin) and they took it out with a tweezers. I was never taken to the hospital tho it needed looking at. Scar has heeled over time coz i grew a bit more since.
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  26. #101
    XTR1000's Avatar
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    i´ve finished top ten in our national 4X/DS cup 2004
    Quote Originally Posted by bigred View Post
    xtr stand for exotic tranny retards
    yo
  27. #102
    drmcboy wrote:
    the only cheese I will eat is on pizza (which is my favorite food). I also avoid most white food - no mayo, tartar sauce, sour cream, etc. However, I drink lots of milk and vanilla is my favorite ice cream flavor.


    Man, this pretty much describes me perfectly, minus the tartar sauce. I also don't like dressing on salads.
    It's funny, because everytime I tell people this someone else is like "me too!". Someday I will unite us all! I never used to eat dressing and I still don't except for my wife's Italian dressing, it's nice and clear and not creamy. I order plain salad when we go out and the servers always look at me like I'm crazy. "No DRESSING?? OK...."
  28. #103
    When I was in high school, I was working out at my gym in St. Louis. I was doing standing calf raises and some old dude comes over to "instruct" me on how to do them correctly. I think grandpa looks pretty heathy, but am I really going to take advice from a 60+ year old. I politely listen and then disregard a lot of what he said.
    Later on I see Grandpa over there with all these muscle heads gathered around him like Jesus giving a sermon. Turns out Joe Weider was trying to help me out, and I blew him off. Damn, I thought he looked familiar.
    Playing live . . . thanks alot Bin Laden.
  29. #104
    -adopted/ korean/ Veteran/ and i can EAT noodles through my nose!!
  30. #105
    Lukie's Avatar
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    I talk to gabe at least 3 times a day. Sometimes on the phone sometimes online. This doesn't count all the times that we play poker together.

    It's really quite scary.
  31. #106
    ChrisTheFish's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lukie
    I talk to gabe at least 3 times a day. Sometimes on the phone sometimes online. This doesn't count all the times that we play poker together.

    It's really quite scary.
    It must be love?
  32. #107
    -im lactose intollerant, yet i love dairy products and get bad stomach aches and sometimes worse...

    -im a pizza delivery boy
  33. #108
    Pythonic's Avatar
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    My dad used to play hide and go seek with Johnnie Cougar Melloncamp. Melloncamp was cousins with my dad's old neighbors in Iowa.
    Never bet on a white man in the heavyweight division!
  34. #109
    Im 21 and Ive owned 4 cars, yet I havent had a running vehicle in over 2 years. 2 of the cars I owned before I got my license at 17 y/0.

    edit: I paid for all the cars by myself, my brother and sister both either had cars given to them or had help buying them. Also not having a car right now is probably a brag, I live in the city a block from the train; train takes 15 minutes to downtown, 20 minutes to the airport. Also its nice to walk/jog/skateboard to wherever I have to go.
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  35. #110
    Lukie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisTheFish
    Quote Originally Posted by Lukie
    I talk to gabe at least 3 times a day. Sometimes on the phone sometimes online. This doesn't count all the times that we play poker together.

    It's really quite scary.
    It must be love?
    no i think it's just b/c we are both so ballin', and we both built our way up in the poker world from the bottom to..... somewhere near the top imo.

    we also have plans of owning half the world (apiece) within the next 20 years or so.
  36. #111
    Quote Originally Posted by Lukie
    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisTheFish
    Quote Originally Posted by Lukie
    I talk to gabe at least 3 times a day. Sometimes on the phone sometimes online. This doesn't count all the times that we play poker together.

    It's really quite scary.
    It must be love?
    no i think it's just b/c we are both so ballin', and we both built our way up in the poker world from the bottom to..... somewhere near the top imo.

    we also have plans of owning half the world (apiece) within the next 20 years or so.
    will you guys settle for 48% each so I can have a lil sliver?
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  37. #112
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by koolmoe
    When I was a kid, there was a large drainage ditch in our neighborhood. It was probably 8-10 feet deep and almost always had a small amount of water (6-12 inches in depth) flowing in it.

    My best friend had to scoop the dog poop out of his backyard before his dad mowed the lawn. He always scooped it into a large kraft paper grocery bag, and his mom would make him dispose of the poop near the drainage ditch. One time, he threw the bag into the water, and we discovered that it would float for quite a long time before the integrity of the bag was compromised and the bag sank. From that day forward we often made a game of setting the bags of poop on fire and floating them down the drainage ditch river.
    Dang, I was hoping this was going to be one of those "I fell and was stuck in the sewer for 20 hours before I was discovered" stories. But still sounds like fun.
    when i was 8 or 9 my dad built a "treehouse" in our backyard. The thing is, we had no trees in our backyard so the tree house was held up in the air with 20 foot 2 by 4s. On halloween that year i went out to swing in the swing hanging under it (was attached to treehouse from above). It had been raining all day and i went to swing and CRASH, the mofo came crashing down on me and i was trapped sinking in the mud betwwen the treehouse and the ground. Long story short an ambulance ran over our fence and like 7 people lifted the thing up as i was about to drown in the mud.
  38. #113
    Quote Originally Posted by DaNutsInYoEye
    Quote Originally Posted by courtiebee
    I'm band camp queen...
    ....And this one time......at band camp..........
    Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
  39. #114
    trik you have had a great life

    little league baseball world series on sportscenter, almost dying b/c of your treehouse, just being awesome and stuff.


    cool shit man.


  40. #115
    Quote Originally Posted by Trikflow77
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by koolmoe
    When I was a kid, there was a large drainage ditch in our neighborhood. It was probably 8-10 feet deep and almost always had a small amount of water (6-12 inches in depth) flowing in it.

    My best friend had to scoop the dog poop out of his backyard before his dad mowed the lawn. He always scooped it into a large kraft paper grocery bag, and his mom would make him dispose of the poop near the drainage ditch. One time, he threw the bag into the water, and we discovered that it would float for quite a long time before the integrity of the bag was compromised and the bag sank. From that day forward we often made a game of setting the bags of poop on fire and floating them down the drainage ditch river.
    Dang, I was hoping this was going to be one of those "I fell and was stuck in the sewer for 20 hours before I was discovered" stories. But still sounds like fun.
    when i was 8 or 9 my dad built a "treehouse" in our backyard. The thing is, we had no trees in our backyard so the tree house was held up in the air with 20 foot 2 by 4s. On halloween that year i went out to swing in the swing hanging under it (was attached to treehouse from above). It had been raining all day and i went to swing and CRASH, the mofo came crashing down on me and i was trapped sinking in the mud betwwen the treehouse and the ground. Long story short an ambulance ran over our fence and like 7 people lifted the thing up as i was about to drown in the mud.
    Now that's what I'm talkin' about. Nh.
  41. #116
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    i hate my dad but i'm afraid i'm turning into him
    TrapperAB: you know, I really should have named myself after the mandibles of a homeless person
  42. #117
    I receive about $900 a month from social security until I graduate High School.
    PSU Class of 2011 weeeeeeee!
  43. #118
    Quote Originally Posted by Harry
    I receive about $900 a month from social security until I graduate High School.
    wait... what?... why?... youre still in highschool?...
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  44. #119
    Quote Originally Posted by Trikflow77
    when i was 10, i played in the little league world series. We were in the semi finals playing florida and i came into pitch in the 4th inning. I threw 2 pitches, both first pitch home runs back to back. It was then broadcast on sports center later that night.
    That is friggin Awesome!!!!!!!!! Had to be exciting as heck
  45. #120
    about a year or two ago; i had temporary schizophrenic pyschcosis. just came outta nowhere, and i was fucking crazy for about a week. luckily just got sent home t parents from uni, and didnt get locked up or anything. was actually a lotta fun; like being on adrenachrome and MDMA at the same time.

    Ironically, i had this schizo sn years before i went crazy; even more ironically i started to believe in god when i did go crazy. (eastern type oreintal god not, certainly not christian)
  46. #121
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    i'm allergic to milk, eggs, nuts, dust, pollen, cat dander, ragweed, and a host of other shit. because of my milk allergy i don't get enough calcium -- i've broken my left arm once and my right arm 3 times. the time i broke my left arm, i also broke my right at the same time. for 4 weeks i had two casts on but i still managed to beat Baldur's Gate in my basement. that game is hard too. also i have a slight crater in my chest and a huge ass adam's apple (my friends call it an adam's cantaloupe.) in addition i get freak nosebleeds often in the spring and fall. also for 6 years in a row i got pneumonia every fall. i'm sure there's other shit wrong with me too but i forget now
    TrapperAB: you know, I really should have named myself after the mandibles of a homeless person
  47. #122
    Holy shit Alibi.
    PSU Class of 2011 weeeeeeee!
  48. #123
    Quote Originally Posted by Alibi
    i'm allergic to milk, eggs, nuts, dust, pollen, cat dander, ragweed, and a host of other shit. because of my milk allergy i don't get enough calcium -- i've broken my left arm once and my right arm 3 times. the time i broke my left arm, i also broke my right at the same time. for 4 weeks i had two casts on but i still managed to beat Baldur's Gate in my basement. that game is hard too. also i have a slight crater in my chest and a huge ass adam's apple (my friends call it an adam's cantaloupe.) in addition i get freak nosebleeds often in the spring and fall. also for 6 years in a row i got pneumonia every fall. i'm sure there's other shit wrong with me too but i forget now
    wow, you cant take calcium pills or something. Man, you are close to being the bubble boy.
  49. #124
    bigred's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alibi
    i'm allergic to milk, eggs, nuts, dust, pollen, cat dander, ragweed, and a host of other shit. because of my milk allergy i don't get enough calcium -- i've broken my left arm once and my right arm 3 times. the time i broke my left arm, i also broke my right at the same time. for 4 weeks i had two casts on but i still managed to beat Baldur's Gate in my basement. that game is hard too. also i have a slight crater in my chest and a huge ass adam's apple (my friends call it an adam's cantaloupe.) in addition i get freak nosebleeds often in the spring and fall. also for 6 years in a row i got pneumonia every fall. i'm sure there's other shit wrong with me too but i forget now
    It's sick boy from Van Wilder!
    LOL OPERATIONS
  50. #125
    chardrian's Avatar
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    When I was in the Peace Corps I lived in a town called Tejutla, San Marcos which is in the Western Highlands of Guatemala. http://www.fallingrain.com/world/GT/17/Tejutla.html

    Anyhoo, it's up in the mountains around 8000 feet (Denver is at about 5000 feet). One of our modes of transport was mountain bikes. The bikes were so/so and were passed down from volunteer to volunteer. My bike had been used by a volunteer in my same town and he used it all the time, so the brake pads were worn down pretty much the whole way.

    So my wife and I go off to a town that is about an hour away by bike. I had to use the Flintstone style of braking (feet on road) since the wheels still rotated even if I had the brakes on the whole way when I was going down the bigass hills but we got there relatively easily.

    On the way back home, we got to the top of a big hill which had a switch back at the bottom of the incline. I asked my wife to go first so I could judge how fast she was going and then I'd figure out whether or not I could make it. She didn't seem to grasp that concept. So I decided to go for it.

    As soon as I started the descent I realized that the hill was a lot steeper than it looked. Even with my brakes on full I was picking up a lot of speed. So I started the Flintstone braking style - but I was going to fast and that wasn't really slowing me down enough. At this point I am almost at the base of the hill - and I am probably going about 20 mph. I start trying to make the turn for the switchback and the bike starts skidding (this was a dirt road with about 3 inches of dust and gravel everywhere). So I quickly determine that my options are to keep turning and wipeout on the road and get some knarly road rash or straighten out and go off the road into that bush straight ahead of me.

    I chose option # 2 and went for the bush. Unfortunately the bush was more of like just weeds, and behind the so called "bush" was a ravine about 20 feet deep with a little creek at the bottom which I failed to notice when I was making the split second decision as to whether to go straight and be stopped by the bush or turn and wipe out.

    I don't remember the fall, but I do remember landing. I landed perfectly at the bottom of the ravine in the creek. It hurt. I managed to somehow scoot my way out of the creek onto the side and just sat there stunned.

    My wife who watched this entire display from the top of the hill saw my feet fly over the edge of the ravine and assumed I was dead since the last ravine we had just passed was closer to a 200 foot drop. She came down shortly thereafter, saw I was alive, and went into a nutty sort of trance where she determined that getting my bike (which was about 5 feet down the ravine side) back to the road was more important than anything else. While she was doing that, I just continued to sit on the creekside in a stupor.

    Luckily, two guys on motorbikes came by within like 10 minutes of my failed attempt to fly (this road often got absolutely no traffic whatsoever) and my wife got them to go back to our town and try and get the town ambulance (like a vw bus with the seats taken out) to come scoop me up. Somehow they also helped me walk out of the creekside and onto the roadside (I still don't know how I did that, but I know they didn't carry me - I walked) and then off they went and we just waited for help to arrive.

    While waiting all of the neraby farmers decided to come out and see what all the excitement was about. They took off my wet clothes (good thing) and covered me with a horse blanket that smelled like horse shit (good and bad thing). They also offered me coffee (weird thing) and tried to put a 5'4" guy's pants on me (I'm 6'4" so that's just a dumb thing). All the while some wizened old lady was wailing "el gringo va a morir" ("the honky is gonna die") over and over again. My wife lost it when I told her I loved her (at that point I knew something was screwed up internally and I thought I had broken my hip and my shoulder and I had no idea if or how long it would take for help to arrive).

    There were still adventures with getting me to the hospital (the people from my town couldn't find the keys to the ambulance for a while and once they did it was still about a 6 hour journey to the hospital in Xela and then I had to get airlifted to Guatemala City which took another day) ... but I've rambled for long enough.

    The end result was a lacerated spleen, and a hairline fracture of my pelvis.
    http://chardrian.blogspot.com
    come check out my training videos at pokerpwnage.com
  51. #126
    Great story.

    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    My wife lost it when I told her I loved her (at that point I knew something was screwed up internally
    I lol'ed.
  52. #127
    gabe's Avatar
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    man this thread is so awesome even know it started with so much hating
  53. #128
    Xianti's Avatar
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    Back in 1971, when I was born in Seoul, men were not circumcised in Korea (might be different now, I don't know).

    After my family moved to the U.S. in 1977, my parents soon learned that circumcision was the norm and most believed it was more sanitary and healthier. I think I was 9 years old when I was circumcised. The doctor used local anesthesia. All I remember is the pain of the syringe and then hearing the snipping sounds.
  54. #129
    chardrian's Avatar
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    No wonder you wear a blue helmet.
    http://chardrian.blogspot.com
    come check out my training videos at pokerpwnage.com
  55. #130
    Miffed22001's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xianti
    Back in 1971, when I was born in Seoul, men were not circumcised in Korea (might be different now, I don't know).

    After my family moved to the U.S. in 1977, my parents soon learned that circumcision was the norm and most believed it was more sanitary and healthier. I think I was 9 years old when I was circumcised. The doctor used local anesthesia. All I remember is the pain of the syringe and then hearing the snipping sounds.
    i got mine done at 10 in the hospital while having a bladder operation.

    Worst bit, the first time i went for the opp it failed as the apparatus was faulty (the were sticking it up my knob into my bladder)
    BUT, while removing thsi faulty apparatus, the surgeon cut the very end of my pee hole on my helmt, so for the next 3 weeks whenever i went for a piss the urine would run over this cut and sting like HAYCHACHACHACHCHAHCAHCACH

    I cried everytime i pissed for 3 weeks. Man that was a badbeat.
  56. #131
    When I was 7 months pregnant with my first child (2002) I was driving from Virginia to Michigan with my husband when we got caught in a bad snowstorm. I was in the right lane behind a semi that was kicking up so much snow I couldn't see so I decided to pass him. While I was in the left lane I saw an accident ahead, with a cop car parked behind a car that had slid off into the cement traffic devider. I went to slow down for it, but we hit the same patch of ice that the first car had and went careening into the cop car. Just before we slammed into the back end of it, I saw the cop standing between his car and the divider. Then, BOOM! The front half of my car and the back end of the patrol car practically fused together.

    Once my husband calmed me down (I don't remember much about right afterwards, I think I was in a bit of shock) we got out to see if the cop was okay. He must have jumped in foot first through the drver door, because when we found him he was laying unconcious (but breathing) over the front seats of his (now completely wrecked) car. My husband grabbed the cop radio and started yelling "Officer Down!" into it.

    Some guy ran up to me and asked if he could do anything. He was the driver of the original wrecked car and he and his buddies had been standing across the road watching all of this. He had a cell so I asked him to call 911 (This actually really pissed me off, wouldn't you have already called if you saw all that?)

    The cop regained conciousness a couple minutes later, and the police and ambulances arrived really quickly. They took the cop away and I asked to go to the hospital as well so they could check on the baby.

    After X-rays and checkups and giving our statement to the police we emerged with severe whiplash and a ticket for 'failure to control vehicle.'

    The cop got a broken arm and a concussion.

    Both of our cars were completely totaled.
    I'm just a girl, you should push.
  57. #132
    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    Quote Originally Posted by Xianti
    Back in 1971, when I was born in Seoul, men were not circumcised in Korea (might be different now, I don't know).

    After my family moved to the U.S. in 1977, my parents soon learned that circumcision was the norm and most believed it was more sanitary and healthier. I think I was 9 years old when I was circumcised. The doctor used local anesthesia. All I remember is the pain of the syringe and then hearing the snipping sounds.
    i got mine done at 10 in the hospital while having a bladder operation.

    Worst bit, the first time i went for the opp it failed as the apparatus was faulty (the were sticking it up my knob into my bladder)
    BUT, while removing thsi faulty apparatus, the surgeon cut the very end of my pee hole on my helmt, so for the next 3 weeks whenever i went for a piss the urine would run over this cut and sting like HAYCHACHACHACHCHAHCAHCACH

    I cried everytime i pissed for 3 weeks. Man that was a badbeat.
    america is so strange isnt it? And yah.. theres no way in hell anyones cutting my cock, esp while Im fucking awake, jesus...

    oh and.. dwarfman, where are you? I think you have a story to tell.
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  58. #133
    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    Quote Originally Posted by Xianti
    Back in 1971, when I was born in Seoul, men were not circumcised in Korea (might be different now, I don't know).

    After my family moved to the U.S. in 1977, my parents soon learned that circumcision was the norm and most believed it was more sanitary and healthier. I think I was 9 years old when I was circumcised. The doctor used local anesthesia. All I remember is the pain of the syringe and then hearing the snipping sounds.
    i got mine done at 10 in the hospital while having a bladder operation.

    Worst bit, the first time i went for the opp it failed as the apparatus was faulty (the were sticking it up my knob into my bladder)
    BUT, while removing thsi faulty apparatus, the surgeon cut the very end of my pee hole on my helmt, so for the next 3 weeks whenever i went for a piss the urine would run over this cut and sting like HAYCHACHACHACHCHAHCAHCACH

    I cried everytime i pissed for 3 weeks. Man that was a badbeat.
    thanks for the picture guys, ive been advised to get it done at 23 years old!!!

    im so happy you all came through it with no problems!!! fuckers
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  59. #134
    chardrian's Avatar
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    haha this turned into a circumcision thread...

    goat - just say no!
    http://chardrian.blogspot.com
    come check out my training videos at pokerpwnage.com
  60. #135
    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    No wonder you wear a blue helmet.


    LMAO...
  61. #136
    Quote Originally Posted by Da GOAT
    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    Quote Originally Posted by Xianti
    Back in 1971, when I was born in Seoul, men were not circumcised in Korea (might be different now, I don't know).

    After my family moved to the U.S. in 1977, my parents soon learned that circumcision was the norm and most believed it was more sanitary and healthier. I think I was 9 years old when I was circumcised. The doctor used local anesthesia. All I remember is the pain of the syringe and then hearing the snipping sounds.
    i got mine done at 10 in the hospital while having a bladder operation.

    Worst bit, the first time i went for the opp it failed as the apparatus was faulty (the were sticking it up my knob into my bladder)
    BUT, while removing thsi faulty apparatus, the surgeon cut the very end of my pee hole on my helmt, so for the next 3 weeks whenever i went for a piss the urine would run over this cut and sting like HAYCHACHACHACHCHAHCAHCACH

    I cried everytime i pissed for 3 weeks. Man that was a badbeat.
    thanks for the picture guys, ive been advised to get it done at 23 years old!!!

    im so happy you all came through it with no problems!!! fuckers
    could you explain why what Im guessing is some sort of doctor would give you this advice?

    My advice: practice avoidance.
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  62. #137
    i dont think some ppl could take the details lol

    Anyway yeah had to see a doctor, who sent me to hospital, who recommended (more advised) the op. Im fine physically but it would make things more comfortable. Im not really explaining it well actually. I rarely get discomfort but sometimes (especially when a woman isnt very eh wet lol it can hurt a little)

    Im fine with the idea coz ive a close mate that had to get it done when he was around 20, i just havent booked an appointment dunno why.

    BTW there was one funny part to my day!!

    Doctor in hospital asked me ''How did this happen? Was it in your sleep or during sexual intercourse?''

    I just laughed at him, since when is masterbating considered sleeping.
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  63. #138
    lube > surgery
  64. #139
    yah.. lube ftw lol
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  65. #140
    Quote Originally Posted by zook
    lube > surgery
    LOL nh sir
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  66. #141
    chardrian's Avatar
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    I'm baffled why cutting off your own "hoodie" would make sex less painful with a dry woman. To me, it would seem it would add protection.

    Anyhoo - the real answer is that you need to be doing more foreplay so that she ain't like the sahara down there. Should make it more enjoyable for both of utes.

    I think maybe we need a new forum for sex advise. I would make a good Dr. Ruth.
    http://chardrian.blogspot.com
    come check out my training videos at pokerpwnage.com
  67. #142
    swiggidy's Avatar
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    Chard's guide to good sex
    1) lift up shirt, caress boobie
    2) pull down skirt, grab cock

    ....

    PROFIT!!!
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  68. #143
    chard I dont think the problem occurs so much during sex with another person... I kinda ran into this problem with a girl this past weekend.. Shes giving me a handjob, and we are both really drunk, and that shit fucking hurt! Stupid vaginal bleeding...
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  69. #144
    Quote Originally Posted by boostNslide
    yah.. getting it done as a baby ftw lol
    FYP
  70. #145
    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    I'm baffled why cutting off your own "hoodie" would make sex less painful with a dry woman. To me, it would seem it would add protection.

    Anyhoo - the real answer is that you need to be doing more foreplay so that she ain't like the sahara down there. Should make it more enjoyable for both of utes.
    I dunno if it would make it less painful without a hoddie coz i have a hoddie.

    Totally agree with second paragraph, its good fun.

    Boost i followed you last post there until u said vaginal bleeding part.......
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  71. #146
    CRUSHER's Avatar
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    I used to work in the movie biz in Hollywood.
    I was an Assistant Director in the Director's Guild of America for many years and I was fortunate to work on such films as, The Shawshank Redemption, Wild Things, The Peacemaker and Casino, to name just a few.
  72. #147
    Quote Originally Posted by CRUSHER
    I used to work in the movie biz in Hollywood.
    I was an Assistant Director in the Director's Guild of America for many years and I was fortunate to work on such films as, The Shawshank Redemption, Wild Things, The Peacemaker and Casino, to name just a few.
    cool, so what do you do now?
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  73. #148
    XTR1000's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    Anyhoo - the real answer is that you need to be doing more foreplay

    lube>>>foreplay
    Quote Originally Posted by bigred View Post
    xtr stand for exotic tranny retards
    yo
  74. #149
    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    I think maybe we need a new forum for sex advise. I would make a good Dr. Ruth.
    Id vote for you, someone who doesnt get any can offer neutral advise
    Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
  75. #150
    Quote Originally Posted by Da GOAT
    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    I'm baffled why cutting off your own "hoodie" would make sex less painful with a dry woman. To me, it would seem it would add protection.

    Anyhoo - the real answer is that you need to be doing more foreplay so that she ain't like the sahara down there. Should make it more enjoyable for both of utes.
    I dunno if it would make it less painful without a hoddie coz i have a hoddie.

    Totally agree with second paragraph, its good fun.

    Boost i followed you last post there until u said vaginal bleeding part.......
    well I was receiving a hand job, and a crappy one at that, cuz she was on the rag. A few days later though... :insert borats over the top hand gesture for sex: sexy time!
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.

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