Select Page
Poker Forum
Over 1,291,000 Posts!
Poker ForumFTR Community

Do you stand or sit when you wipe?

View Poll Results: Stand or Sit?

Voters
160. You may not vote on this poll
  • Sit

    96 60.00%
  • Stand

    64 40.00%
Page 5 of 6 FirstFirst ... 3456 LastLast
Results 301 to 375 of 402
  1. #301
    the internet is a fascinating limitless source of knowledge.
  2. #302
    If Scotch tape touches my anus while I'm sleeping, odds are that's going to wake me up and that's as annoying as having worms. We can't win.
  3. #303
    My girlfriend might get the wrong idea if I ask her to touch my anus while I'm sleeping.
  4. #304
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    28,082
    Location
    himself fucker.
    Quote Originally Posted by boost View Post
    oh...
    Hahaha oh wow
    <a href=http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png target=_blank>http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png</a>
  5. #305
    pantherhound's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Posts
    911
    Location
    Love me for a season
    I was a stander but I have reached a compromise, a half-crouch I call 'The ski-jumper'. I've found there is better wipe yield to be achieved by this.
  6. #306
    Why does this thread keep getting bumbed sigh.

    But seriously this \/V\/
    Quote Originally Posted by pantherhound View Post
    hold the phone, how do you wipe sitting down? your ass is by nature blocking the seat?
    There can't be that many Paris Hilton sized bums here that don't need to stand a little to gain access!
  7. #307
    bode's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    8,043
    Location
    slow motion
    Quote Originally Posted by pantherhound View Post
    I was a stander but I have reached a compromise, a half-crouch I call 'The ski-jumper'. I've found there is better wipe yield to be achieved by this.
    i thought this was implied by "standing". are there people here that actually stand straight up?

    i'm a stander (ski-jumper) btw
    eeevees are not monies yet...they are like baby monies.
  8. #308
    Had surgery on my right elbow a week or so ago where a splint and ace bandage was used to hold it in place.

    You ever been forced to use the other hand to wipe? Very difficult
    "Just cause I'm from the South don't mean I ain't got no book learnin'"

    Quote Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla View Post
    ...we've all learned long ago how to share the truth without actually having the truth.
  9. #309
    Quote Originally Posted by bode View Post
    i thought this was implied by "standing". are there people here that actually stand straight up?

    i'm a stander (ski-jumper) btw
    I stand all the way up. I've probably already commented in this thread because I find this unusually fascinating. I seriously had no idea whatsoever that people sat when they wiped until one time when I was 10-or-so my brother's friend walked in on me while I was wiping (I had the door resting on the latch, but not properly closed), and he was like "OMG why is the door open and why do you stand up when you wipe?!"

    It blew my mind on two levels because 1) I had no idea that you were supposed to push the door all the way closed and that having it rest on the latch didn't count as a closed door and 2) for a LONG time I was like, "wtf, people sit down while they wipe?"

    Since I take an insane amount of shits in public restrooms these days, I sit down when I wipe a lot now (damned auto-flush toilets!), but there are a lot of times where I do this awkward stand-up-but-duck-your-head-low-enough-so-that-you-can't-see-over-the-top-of-the-stall thing, and it's like woah on the socially awkward penguin richtor scale.
  10. #310
    Where's the option for have done both? U ever crap in open stalls with other men? Boot camp starts to get weird there.
  11. #311
    pantherhound's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Posts
    911
    Location
    Love me for a season
    Quote Originally Posted by surviva316 View Post
    I stand all the way up. I've probably already commented in this thread because I find this unusually fascinating. I seriously had no idea whatsoever that people sat when they wiped until one time when I was 10-or-so my brother's friend walked in on me while I was wiping (I had the door resting on the latch, but not properly closed), and he was like "OMG why is the door open and why do you stand up when you wipe?!"

    It blew my mind on two levels because 1) I had no idea that you were supposed to push the door all the way closed and that having it rest on the latch didn't count as a closed door and 2) for a LONG time I was like, "wtf, people sit down while they wipe?"

    Since I take an insane amount of shits in public restrooms these days, I sit down when I wipe a lot now (damned auto-flush toilets!), but there are a lot of times where I do this awkward stand-up-but-duck-your-head-low-enough-so-that-you-can't-see-over-the-top-of-the-stall thing, and it's like woah on the socially awkward penguin richtor scale.
    I stand all the way up, or at least I did until a few days ago. Now I crouch, after taking one step away from the toilet. Surely this is regarded as sitting? I'm in a sitting position still. Sitting then wiping is just more trouble than it's worth, your ass is blocking the seat and there really is no reason to do it. If you move to the side to wipe you might as well crouch.
  12. #312
    Jesus fucking Christ, standers, lose weight or buy a goddamn elongated toilet instead of some pussy round one. Have we made no progress on this in 3 years?
  13. #313
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    28,082
    Location
    himself fucker.
    You know how those guys that always rail against gays usually turn out to be the biggest closet cases?

    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue View Post
    Jesus fucking Christ, standers, lose weight or buy a goddamn elongated toilet instead of some pussy round one. Have we made no progress on this in 3 years?
    Sounds to me like BennyLaRue is a water-closet case.

    Don't hate the way you wipe, Benny. Abraham Lincoln was a stander.
    <a href=http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png target=_blank>http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png</a>
  14. #314
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue View Post
    Jesus fucking Christ, standers, lose weight or buy a goddamn elongated toilet instead of some pussy round one. Have we made no progress on this in 3 years?
    I stand, aren't fat and have a goddman elongated toilet. What is so wrong with standing I axe you? We good standers aren't launching vitriolic attacks against the sitting community, are good law abiding, tax paying citizens so I axe you again: what is so wrong with standing?
  15. #315
    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer View Post
    I stand, aren't fat and have a goddman elongated toilet. What is so wrong with standing I axe you? We good standers aren't launching vitriolic attacks against the sitting community, are good law abiding, tax paying citizens so I axe you again: what is so wrong with standing?
    You smell like poop. Right now.
  16. #316
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue View Post
    You smell like poop. Right now.
    I'm not the one putting my hand into a toilet bowl, putting it in danger of touching the disgusting lid.
  17. #317
    bode's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    8,043
    Location
    slow motion
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue View Post
    You smell like poop. Right now.
    lets elaborate on this a little. What makes the people that smell like poop, smell like poop? A couple of times a week, one guy i work with smells like he wiped his ass with his bare hand and just went on with his day. I always thought it may only be fat people that had this problem, but i encounter 3 people regularly that smell this way: one fat, one very thin, and one very athletic.
    eeevees are not monies yet...they are like baby monies.
  18. #318
    Sit and lean a bit forward to wipe. Standing is lol.
  19. #319
    Quote Originally Posted by BennyLaRue View Post
    Jesus fucking Christ, standers, lose weight or buy a goddamn elongated toilet instead of some pussy round one. Have we made no progress on this in 3 years?
    came here to rip on standers but you did it much more eloquently than i could have. QFFT.
  20. #320
    Sitting splits the cheeks a bit better, unless you're John Mccain I don't see how reaching when sitting could be an issue
    Congratulations, you've won your dick's weight in sweets! Decode the message in the above post to find out how to claim your tic-tac
  21. #321
    rpm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    3,084
    Location
    maaaaaaaaaaate
    used to be a stander, read this thread, sized up my options, now a sitter
  22. #322
    Has anyone converted to a full blown stander though? No. Case ca-losed.
  23. #323
    I converted from standing as a achild to a sitter when I was a teenager. I also converted from balling up tp to folding repeatedly (credit to BuFu). Get way more wipes per square of tp. Saving pennies ftw!

    I've tried standing again and it makes me feel like I'm six.
  24. #324
    This thread changed my life
  25. #325
    Quote Originally Posted by Pascal View Post
    This thread changed my life
    By saving you 15% on car insurance?
  26. #326
    rpm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    3,084
    Location
    maaaaaaaaaaate
    Quote Originally Posted by dranger7070 View Post
    I converted from standing as a achild to a sitter when I was a teenager. I also converted from balling up tp to folding repeatedly (credit to BuFu). Get way more wipes per square of tp. Saving pennies ftw!
    this here is a man of wisdom. take heed
  27. #327
    Possibly the first time I've ever been called that.
  28. #328
    pantherhound's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Posts
    911
    Location
    Love me for a season
    OK, so after being a stander my whole life and reading this thread and dismissing sitters, not understanding how the technique works, I tried again, and had the 'Eureka' moment that must have hit all stander/sitter converts worldwide.

    You tilt to the side and balance on your left asscheek, with a hand against the wall for support, making for a clean and thorough wipe without mess, and your hand is nowhere near the bowl. Sounds like it puts unbearable strain on the ass, but it's really easy! Standing up to the position in which I once wiped, I could hardly believe it was all so simple.

    I think this is it for me, I can't see me going back now. Sitters, I owe you all a humble apology.
  29. #329
    rpm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    3,084
    Location
    maaaaaaaaaaate
    WHO PUT YOU UP TO THIS
  30. #330
    Quote Originally Posted by dranger7070 View Post
    Possibly the first time I've ever been called that.
    Love the new avatar

    Aah, the rubber band is on the other claw...
    Congratulations, you've won your dick's weight in sweets! Decode the message in the above post to find out how to claim your tic-tac
  31. #331
    Quote Originally Posted by pantherhound View Post
    OK, so after being a stander my whole life and reading this thread and dismissing sitters, not understanding how the technique works, I tried again, and had the 'Eureka' moment that must have hit all stander/sitter converts worldwide.

    You tilt to the side and balance on your left asscheek, with a hand against the wall for support, making for a clean and thorough wipe without mess, and your hand is nowhere near the bowl. Sounds like it puts unbearable strain on the ass, but it's really easy! Standing up to the position in which I once wiped, I could hardly believe it was all so simple.

    I think this is it for me, I can't see me going back now. Sitters, I owe you all a humble apology.
    I do both and both are fine. Maybe the only reason I continue to stand when I wip 90%+ of the time is because the first thing I wanna do when I'm done is see how big it was. Do sitters never get to admire until after they've filled the bowl with TP?
  32. #332
    Quote Originally Posted by surviva316 View Post
    I do both and both are fine. Maybe the only reason I continue to stand when I wip 90%+ of the time is because the first thing I wanna do when I'm done is see how big it was. Do sitters never get to admire until after they've filled the bowl with TP?
    Does that mean you take pride in making a big turd?
  33. #333
    You don't?! If I felt it wss particularly large I 100% look first. Once in high school we had the auto flushers and a dropped a good 9 inche, wrapped tp around sensor and left it for nrxt person to admire. I take great pride in large poos.
  34. #334
    Stacks's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    4,015
    Location
    Im opedipus bitch, the original balla.
    I don't make shit. I make art.

    This was a while back, and I was drunk. So whatever.

    NSFW I suppose (it's a picture of shit)

    http://i.imgur.com/sOG1s.jpg
    http://i.imgur.com/f0QAT.jpg

    No I don't routinely take pictures of shits and mspaint them. Although, if we go by how amusing this one was, I might be missing out.
  35. #335
    Galapogos's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    6,876
    Location
    The Loser's Lounge
    Well, I guess it was only a matter of time until people actually started posting pictures of poo in this thread.

    Just to warn any other lemmings, his mspaints are about 1% mspaint and 99% original poo photo. I was expecting something a little more dressed up. I have only myself to blame.


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  36. #336
    It looks like your asshole was bloody from the prison rale.
  37. #337
    Stacks's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    4,015
    Location
    Im opedipus bitch, the original balla.
    Quote Originally Posted by Galapogos View Post
    Well, I guess it was only a matter of time until people actually started posting pictures of poo in this thread.

    Just to warn any other lemmings, his mspaints are about 1% mspaint and 99% original poo photo. I was expecting something a little more dressed up. I have only myself to blame.
    Shame it took this long huh?

    Don't like my mspaint? I thought it was spot on!
  38. #338
    Galapogos's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    6,876
    Location
    The Loser's Lounge
    Quote Originally Posted by Stacks View Post
    Shame it took this long huh?

    Don't like my mspaint? I thought it was spot on!
    It was shit.

    Sad Trombone Sound Effect - FAIL Sound - Fail Horns - YouTube


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  39. #339
    Stacks's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    4,015
    Location
    Im opedipus bitch, the original balla.
    Quote Originally Posted by Galapogos View Post
    FTFY
  40. #340
    stacks
  41. #341
    Quote Originally Posted by jackvance View Post
    Does that mean you take pride in making a big turd?
    I have a natural curiosity about it. I don't know how much "pride" I take in big ones, but whenever I'm on a toilet with automatic sensors, it feels strange to betray my natural tendency to see what my poo looks like.

    Maybe it's a legitimate curiosity rooted in the evolutionary advantage of regularly checking on your fecal matter to make sure everything's in order; maybe I'm just some sicky whose fascination with my own human waste would draw the ire of the psychological community. Who knows.
  42. #342
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    28,082
    Location
    himself fucker.


    <a href=http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png target=_blank>http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png</a>
  43. #343
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    And that is why I tell people they have to learn to squat past parallel in the gym. It's not only good for you, but natural for the rest of the world.
  44. #344
    JFC STACKS

    Man, post of the fucking year, can't believe he actually posted pictures of his own poop. I clicked, midway through eating a subway sandwich (as to why I was doing that while reading this thread, I have no answer) assuming that it obviously had to be a troll, or as he implied some type of MS paint of what his poop looked like.

    Appetite gone, but more importantly I laughed so fucking hard I nearly choked myself on a banana pepper.
  45. #345
    Anyone heard from salsa lately?
  46. #346
    Quote Originally Posted by Penneywize View Post
    JFC STACKS

    Man, post of the fucking year, can't believe he actually posted pictures of his own poop. I clicked, midway through eating a subway sandwich.
    If Subway, then you should have your own poop photo op in about 7 minutes. Can't guarantee it will be solid, tho.
  47. #347
    mrhappy333's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    3,722
    Location
    Mohegan Sun or MGM Springfield
    Saw a stander yesterday. It creeped me out a bit, and made me think of this thread.lol.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  48. #348
    This thread inspired me to try sitting. As I leaned over to make room for my hand, my dangling penis uncomfortably bounced off the rim. Not giving up I reached under to wipe and my hand touched the toilet seat.

    Conclusion: sitters have small and/or dirty penises.
  49. #349
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    28,082
    Location
    himself fucker.
    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer View Post
    This thread inspired me to try sitting. As I leaned over to make room for my hand, my dangling penis uncomfortably bounced off the rim. Not giving up I reached under to wipe and my hand touched the toilet seat.

    Conclusion: sitters have small and/or dirty penises.
    Sparklingly clean buttholes, though
    <a href=http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png target=_blank>http://i.imgur.com/kWiMIMW.png</a>
  50. #350
    Quote Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla View Post
    Sparklingly clean buttholes, though
    that crown belongs to bidet users and porn stars
  51. #351
    mrhappy333's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    3,722
    Location
    Mohegan Sun or MGM Springfield
    Is this a good question to ask on a first date?
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  52. #352
    Galapogos's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    6,876
    Location
    The Loser's Lounge
    Quote Originally Posted by mrhappy333 View Post
    Saw a stander yesterday. It creeped me out a bit, and made me think of this thread.lol.
    I have never seen someone shit in my life. Please tell me how you casually came about this.


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  53. #353
    Happens to me too on occasion. When you know some other people are in the house but you think they're in some other room when you go to the toilet.
  54. #354
    I had a feeling I was in the minority. Damn thing always flushes when I stand up at work to wipe!
  55. #355
    Quote Originally Posted by CBAT View Post
    I had a feeling I was in the minority. Damn thing always flushes when I stand up at work to wipe!
    your pain. I feels it. though my work one has a tiny button near the sensor on the wall I can ninja kick.
  56. #356
    mrhappy333's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    3,722
    Location
    Mohegan Sun or MGM Springfield
    Public toilet!
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  57. #357
    mrhappy333's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    3,722
    Location
    Mohegan Sun or MGM Springfield
    Quote Originally Posted by Galapogos View Post
    I have never seen someone shit in my life. Please tell me how you casually came about this.
    public toilets.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  58. #358
    have you ever seen the standing/hovering only toilets in some countries?

    Just two feet positioners either side of a hole, (not completely uncivilised, they do have flushing mechanisms).

    Creates the other dilemma of which way should you face?
  59. #359
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    753
    Location
    B.C. Canada
    Standing? WTF?
  60. #360
    Quote Originally Posted by chemist View Post
    have you ever seen the standing/hovering only toilets in some countries?

    Just two feet positioners either side of a hole, (not completely uncivilised, they do have flushing mechanisms).

    Creates the other dilemma of which way should you face?
    We call them french toilets. They're awkward as hell.
  61. #361
    They are super common in Thailand. It seemed moreso in BKK than up north. I never shat in one. I would've-- just never had to. I would like to think I'd have faced the wall, as opposed to the door, just to throw the universe a bit off kilter.
  62. #362
    They're also common in turkey and morocco, although everyone is modernizing these days. I used one once when I had to visit a client south of Paris, a construction facility with old infrastructure.
  63. #363
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    753
    Location
    B.C. Canada
    Tried standing for 30 days (but not by choice)
    100yr. old prison > sent to seg. for chasing the guards into the bubble. Seg. was full so I was sent to the dungeon (old seg. that had been closed for many yrs.).
    All they had there was a hole in the floor that flushed LOUDLY every 15mins. (kept you awake all day & night)
    Had to squat & dump which resulted in 'standing' for the wipe action.
  64. #364
    bode's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    8,043
    Location
    slow motion
    you're a convert not, right?

    i'm having surgery on my right wrist tomorrow morning which will force me to wipe with my left hand for the next week or 2. This should be interesting.
    eeevees are not monies yet...they are like baby monies.
  65. #365
    rong's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9,033
    Location
    behind you with an axe
    I had to squat on a train from Chiang mai to Bangkok. My train was at 9pm, at 8pm I figured I could go eat or get a foot massage. I chose the foot massage but I was really hungry as I was on my way to the station afterwards so stopped at a street vendor and ordered something. It seems this was a mistake. I woke at 4am with pains in my stomach and needing a shit. I was determined to hold out until approx 9am when I would arrive at,my hotel. By 7.30 I couldn't wait any longer. I made it to the toilet which was a hole leading straight to the tracks. There's a handle either side to hold on to and a window to the side which is just a 40cm by 30 cm hole in the wall approx head height with a metal bar across it. I squat and go but I'm pretty unwell so I'm shitting water for a good 5 minutes. About 2 minutes in the train pulls up at a station, its a suburb about half hour outside of Bangkok. It's quite busy with lots of Thais and a few tourists. I'm just looking out the window at them, shitting and farting loudly. I even make eye contact with a few people. The tourists looked like they could feel my pain or alternatively that could have been a look of disgust. Fun times.
    I'm the king of bongo, baby I'm the king of bongo bong.
  66. #366
    Quote Originally Posted by bode View Post
    you're a convert not, right?

    i'm having surgery on my right wrist tomorrow morning which will force me to wipe with my left hand for the next week or 2. This should be interesting.
    I had less issues with wiping than I did with blowing my nose when I had a cold both times I had surgery on my shoulder.
  67. #367
    Quote Originally Posted by rong View Post
    I had to squat on a train from Chiang mai to Bangkok. My train was at 9pm, at 8pm I figured I could go eat or get a foot massage. I chose the foot massage but I was really hungry as I was on my way to the station afterwards so stopped at a street vendor and ordered something. It seems this was a mistake. I woke at 4am with pains in my stomach and needing a shit. I was determined to hold out until approx 9am when I would arrive at,my hotel. By 7.30 I couldn't wait any longer. I made it to the toilet which was a hole leading straight to the tracks. There's a handle either side to hold on to and a window to the side which is just a 40cm by 30 cm hole in the wall approx head height with a metal bar across it. I squat and go but I'm pretty unwell so I'm shitting water for a good 5 minutes. About 2 minutes in the train pulls up at a station, its a suburb about half hour outside of Bangkok. It's quite busy with lots of Thais and a few tourists. I'm just looking out the window at them, shitting and farting loudly. I even make eye contact with a few people. The tourists looked like they could feel my pain or alternatively that could have been a look of disgust. Fun times.
    lolz
    Normski
  68. #368
    rong, pretty funny anecdote.
  69. #369
    Haha those social awkward situations This could totally be made into a Seinfeld episode.
  70. #370
    I've been AFK for years. Glad to see this thread still tops the forum =)
  71. #371
    zwift lives eh
  72. #372
    Just to be clear, we're all pretending like post #363 didn't happen?
  73. #373
    rong's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9,033
    Location
    behind you with an axe
    I'm the king of bongo, baby I'm the king of bongo bong.
  74. #374
    rong's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    9,033
    Location
    behind you with an axe
    hmmm... I don't think that's what I was after.
    I'm the king of bongo, baby I'm the king of bongo bong.
  75. #375
    Quote Originally Posted by surviva316 View Post
    Just to be clear, we're all pretending like post #363 didn't happen?
    Confirmed. I mean it wasn't my intention, but after several tries still just does not compute so moving on with discussing poobum

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •