Most Redneck Shit Ever

[spoonitnow]

I saw a guy get hit in the face with a log this weekend.

I saw a guy try to fuck two of his cousins in the same night.

Guy #2 also shot one of his aunt's cows with an AK-47 this past weekend.

I'll easily win this thread, but post your most redneck shit ever.

[grnydrowave2]

lol, I live in Texas and I never see shit like that. Sorry I have nothing to contribute.

[Hawk]

How about a redneck tanktop?

[UG]

[gabe]

[spoonitnow]

Fucker.

Yeah I've seen underwear made into tanktops like that a few times before, but mostly for kids.

[lolzzz_321]

[x]can guess who author was just by looking at the title
[ ]FTR admin besides Xianti
[ ]lynch Pelion

[lolzzz_321]

[spoonitnow]

My best friend since like 2nd grade, and his girlfriend, in his mom's trailer.

[spoonitnow]

p.s. yeah we like em big

[spoonitnow]

also he's the guy who got hit with the log

[lolzzz_321]

[x]triple posting is blowing up your Blackberry with email notifications

[gabe]

just got back from my first ever country music concert, can you tell?

hint: the shirt, the hat, and the dumbfounded look

[Renton]

in chattanooga when i go out drinking with my mom, she takes me to these honky tonk pieces of shit.

Let me tell you something about these bars. They don't even sell liquor. They just sell bud and bud light and that is all. But what they do let u do is "brown bag" it. Brownbagging it is when you go and get some liquor and bring it into the bar and drink it.

I had never heard of brownbagging it before because here in civilized urban settings bars actually sell booze.

[Frink]

in chattanooga when i go out drinking with my mom...

I stopped reading there.

[spoonitnow]

in chattanooga when i go out drinking with my mom, she takes me to these honky tonk pieces of shit

That's pretty redneck. You bone her?

[gabe]

you never heard of brown bagging in it??? wtf

it doesnt even have to be liquor, people on the corner always just have 40s or 22s in some brown bag

[bigred]

I once took the subway instead of a cab

[Renton]

you never heard of brown bagging in it??? wtf

it doesnt even have to be liquor, people on the corner always just have 40s or 22s in some brown bag

well yea obv, i've just never heard of bars that let you bring it in because they suck too much to have a liquor license.

[gabe]

also, in chicago there are tons of places like that because its so hard to get a license there. they do it for beer and liquor.

[flomo]

holy crap!!!!!!! this thread is funny

[Deanglow]

Guy #2 also shot one of his aunt's cows with an AK-47 this past weekend.

Wow for a split second I thought you were talking about a hand in Omaha and said wtf?!

[spoonitnow]

Guy #2 also shot one of his aunt's cows with an AK-47 this past weekend.

Wow for a split second I thought you were talking about a hand in Omaha and said wtf?!

You're not very redneck then.

I've said this before in another thread but it deserves its spot here as well:

When I was 4 or 5 (just remember it was pre-kindergarten) my dad would ride around in his truck with a 6-pack of Budweiser and when he finished one he would hand me the bottle to throw out the window at signs or mailboxes or whatever.

I've got a ton of these stories but I've gtg atm so I'll tell more later.

[WillburForce]

Living in London i've never seen either a cow or an AK-47...

however when i did some work expeirence in a place called Bridgewater, peoples medicals records kept having NFB written on it.

It meant Normal For Bridgewater. Loads of the locals have extra toes/fingers amputated or genrally being a bit slow....fucking inbreds

[spoonitnow]

In high school we caught this guy Scott eating out his sister on a pool table. He was 17, she was 15.

[spoonitnow]

The state junior rodeo championships kind of shit were held about 3 miles down the road from here.

[givememyleg]

In high school we caught this guy Scott eating out his sister on a pool table. He was 17, she was 15.

hmm

[spoonitnow]

In high school we caught this guy Scott eating out his sister on a pool table. He was 17, she was 15.

hmm

Before you even say it, no I don't have a sister.

[gabe]

how did you just "catch" him? it doesnt seem like they were hiding it

[spoonitnow]

He didn't know anyone else was there I guess. When his dad found out, he beat the living shit out of both of them.

I don't advocate racism but this next one needs to be told.

There are a lot of hispanics who live around here because of the farming, etc. A lot of people I know call them "Taco Niggers".

Is that not some of the dumbest shit ever?

[bigred]

In high school we caught this guy Scott eating out his sister on a pool table. He was 17, she was 15.

hmm

BS?

[Miffed22001]

id love to post that joke from AIM, but that will result in banaments

[spoonitnow]

In high school we caught this guy Scott eating out his sister on a pool table. He was 17, she was 15.

hmm

BS?

Give me a day or two and I can probably get pics of both of them.

FWIW I'd fuck his sister, so can't blame him. Except for the he's a sick fuck part.

[gabe]

was he banging her too or just eating her out? god damn

[EzDuzIt]

[spoonitnow]

guy who was trying to fuck his cousin(s)

[mrhappy333]

I host the Swamp Yankee Olympics here at my house when I get VERY Wasted.

Some of the games: Including-but not limited too:

The Clothes line crawl
( I broke the line Halfway out and fell on my Ass)
my wife was pissed

The Deck Toss
( I got the dog house off the deck and about 40' away after it rolled down the hill, this was brand new and for our 110lb lab)
my wife was pissed

The Loudest Gas Fireball
pour as much gas into fire pit and lite it, makes a HUGE wooosh

Fire pit Jump
after fire is lit, run and see who can jump over the tall flames