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Squeaky_Midget1
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07-21-2008, 05:16 PM
Post subject: Stripper Etiquette
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#1 (permalink)
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Straight
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 126
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Are strippers normal people just like me? Not by any stretch of the means, but there are some guidelines for proper strip club behavior. What are some strip club guidelines and etiquette?
1.DO treat lap dances like rounds. Buy them for your friends and have them buy them for you.
2.DON'T comment on how well stretch marks or c-section scars show up under blacklight.
3.DO tip the ugly dancers at least a dollar when you send them into the VIP lounge or dressing room to fetch a sexier dancer at your request. They have kids to feed, too.
4.DON'T ask about a stripper’s personal life. Ever. Unless you want what little faith in humanity you have shattered.
5.DON'T try to tip the stripper with a sandwich. You will get kicked out.
6.DO NOT get into an argument with a stupid stripper. No matter what you say, she will state some inflated earning potential ("I make $700 a night") as the very definition of her existence, which justifies everything she's ever done with her wasted life as correct. No matter if she couldn’t earn $7 stripping at a dog track, she’ll still say it. As a general rule, take what any ugly stripper says she earns and divide by ten, then divide by 2 for her true earning potential.
Keep em rollin guys!
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BennyLaRue
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07-21-2008, 05:30 PM
Post subject: Re: Stripper Etiquette
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#2 (permalink)
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Squeaky_Midget1
4.DON'T ask about a stripper’s personal life. Ever. Unless you want what little faith in humanity you have shattered.
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Further to this, if she has one, do NOT make reference to her black eye(s) in any way. Pretend not to notice it and you shall be rewarded.
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d0zer
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Moderator
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,521
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Show interest in mediocre-looking eastern-european strippers. They'll do A LOT  to try and convince you to give them money, and it'll take them quite a while to realize you aren't gunna give them any money.
Oh wait. That's like...the opposite of etiquette or something...
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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Valuable information here.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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some stripper - "heyyy there, my name is mary! *wink*"
some ftr guy - "oh, i don't care what your name is"
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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d0zer
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Moderator
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,521
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I don't want to know your name, I just want to go bang bang.
But since I can't even tickle yer clit, I ain't gunna give you shit.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
some stripper - "heyyy there, my name is mary! *wink*"
some ftr guy - "oh, i don't care what your name is"
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good times
good times
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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you forgot - Don't give a stripper Monoploy money and then try to tell her you gave her fake money because her tits are fake.
Eidt: That joke was so much funnier last night when Larry the Cable Guy said it.
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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BankItDrew
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Losing Prop Bets
Posts: 2,789
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Don't eat the chicken fingers.
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Girlfriend: Why are the werewolves more important than living life?!
Girlfriend: Are you on the forums doing the werewolves again?
Girlfriend: Soo... you forgot to run that errand, but you had time to werewolf? Wtf?
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
some stripper - "heyyy there, my name is mary! *wink*"
some ftr guy - "oh, i don't care what your name is"
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good times
good times |
he he
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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yourfather
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: In your fridge
Posts: 603
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DO pay them in tourney chips with no actual value. J/K kinda
DON'T Get too drunk and try to make dinner dates with them
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Pythonic
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Flush
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: In S-mart Swallowing Your Soul!
Posts: 586
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Don't take the dollar bill out with your teeth
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Never bet on a white man in the heavyweight division!
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Monty3038
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 788
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Wow... this is a topic I could go on and on about... I spent many years spending many nights in these clubs...
Some others...
No matter what she says, her real name will never be known to you. She has at least two... one for the stage and one for dorks like you who think you want to get to know her.
Always shun the hottest stripper in the club, she won't dance for shit for you and she expect to get majorly paid for poor performance.
Always get dances from the mid-range strippers in the club... they are there for action and to earn the $$ so they work harder for it.
Always check TUSCL.com before going to an out-of town club, well worth the time to get reviews of clubs from actual guys who spend time there.
Never get totally hammered at an out of town club, you don't know where you will end up and you'll be broke when you get there.
Always learn the bartender/server name. Don't ask them to get you dancers, that is your job.
Don't look like a desperate fool, you've seen boobies before, let them come to you... and if you are only semi-interested they work harder for your attention...
Ok... OBVIOUSLY I spent too much time in these clubs... for more details let me know... i can comment on a number of the clubs or methodologies...
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allabout
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Flush
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: VA USA
Posts: 277
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I've heard this before and its so true...Its ok to date a stripper (recommended at least once), but never ever marry a stripper.
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"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity." - Elmer Letterman
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mrhappy333
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hartford, CT
Posts: 1,078
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Never ask " show me your dick! "
You will get kicked in the face
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3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by allabout
I've heard this before and its so true...Its ok to date a stripper (recommended at least once), but never ever marry a stripper.
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I did, it's something I brag about when I'm drunk and regret when I'm sober.
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thizzSantaCruz
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Full House
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Santa Cruz
Posts: 894
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5. Have your money handy and never pull out more than you intent to give her. I had one stripper go from very sexual to stripper rage when I wouldn't order another lapdance after I had pulled out a wallet completely stuffed with cash.
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Flopping quads and boats like its my job
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Pythonic
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Flush
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: In S-mart Swallowing Your Soul!
Posts: 586
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by thizzSantaCruz
5. Have your money handy and never pull out more than you intent to give her. I had one stripper go from very sexual to stripper rage when I wouldn't order another lapdance after I had pulled out a wallet completely stuffed with cash.
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Should have told her to touch her toes in the parking lot.
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Never bet on a white man in the heavyweight division!
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Monty3038
Wow... this is a topic I could go on and on about... I spent many years spending many nights in these clubs...
Some others...
No matter what she says, her real name will never be known to you. She has at least two... one for the stage and one for dorks like you who think you want to get to know her.
Always shun the hottest stripper in the club, she won't dance for shit for you and she expect to get majorly paid for poor performance.
Always get dances from the mid-range strippers in the club... they are there for action and to earn the $$ so they work harder for it.
Always check TUSCL.com before going to an out-of town club, well worth the time to get reviews of clubs from actual guys who spend time there.
Never get totally hammered at an out of town club, you don't know where you will end up and you'll be broke when you get there.
Always learn the bartender/server name. Don't ask them to get you dancers, that is your job.
Don't look like a desperate fool, you've seen boobies before, let them come to you... and if you are only semi-interested they work harder for your attention...
Ok... OBVIOUSLY I spent too much time in these clubs... for more details let me know... i can comment on a number of the clubs or methodologies...
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I think we may be twins
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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Monty3038
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 788
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by thizzSantaCruz
5. Have your money handy and never pull out more than you intent to give her. I had one stripper go from very sexual to stripper rage when I wouldn't order another lapdance after I had pulled out a wallet completely stuffed with cash.
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Ah... the biggest mistake of a noob strip club visitor... using your wallet.
Rule #1 put your money in a clip, in your pocket, preferably your chest pocket... put the 100's on the outside, 1's on the inside. Know how much you have at all times without counting, never put more than you intend to spend in the roll at one time. Always have a few 5's and 10's.
When the dance is over, pay what you intend to, it is ok to throw a few singles in during the dance too for encouragement... but never let the woman dictate what you pay for the dance, pay what it was worth... but don't be afraid to pay for it. Always pull out the clip within the last 30 seconds of the song, flip to what you intend to pay and get it ready, then return the clip to your pocket.
Don't ever be intimidated into a dance or allow yourself to be told you're cheap... they are there to EARN it... not just stand there and EXPECT it.
If there are table minimums ($5, $10) don't be afraid to only pay the minimum unless you get a very good performance. Also don't be shy about taking 2-for-1 deals when announced by the DJ... these are great opportunities for the dancer to give a little extra, and when she does be sure to pay for two dances, not one...
Ok, now I'm just getting too detailled.
My one buddy has the best luck in clubs where he goes in and doesn't appear to care, won't smile, etc. The girls all try very hard to get him to smile, which he usually does when returnning from the back room.
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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LOL OPERATIONS
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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This. Plus it costs many monies.
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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Buying drinks for random girls (which I've never done) is probably a more +EV line
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LOL OPERATIONS
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bjsaust
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Straight Flush
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Ballarat, Australia
Posts: 5,842
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I like to talk to them to give them hope and then say no thanks, like I thought they really were just interested in talking to me, and not in my money.
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Just playing to improve.
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Monty3038
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 788
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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Ah yes, the old I don't like boobies line 
You are going to too high class of a club if you can't touch.
Also, if you aren't attracted to what was at home (as it used to be for me years ago) you go for inspiration.
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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Strip clubs in South Florida (including Tampa) ftw
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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Monty3038
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 788
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by GatorJH
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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Strip clubs in South Florida (including Tampa) ftw |
Man, I haven't been to Tampa in 5-6 years but damn they had the best I've seen. The dance where they take you to the floor and dance like standing sex... that is pretty hot, also they have some of the best clubs in general... or they did.
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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they are still good, but South Florida (Miami/Boca Raton area) are way better these days.
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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Monty3038
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 788
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Never been to Miami/Boca, Daytona had at least one good one in the past. Ohio has tons of clubs, only a few good ones though. I've heard Windsor Ontario has quite a few good ones.
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Monty3038
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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Ah yes, the old I don't like boobies line
You are going to too high class of a club if you can't touch.
Also, if you aren't attracted to what was at home (as it used to be for me years ago) you go for inspiration. |
Nope...rather take girls home from bar...
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LOL OPERATIONS
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Monty3038
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Ohio
Posts: 788
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Monty3038
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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Ah yes, the old I don't like boobies line
You are going to too high class of a club if you can't touch.
Also, if you aren't attracted to what was at home (as it used to be for me years ago) you go for inspiration. |
Nope...rather take girls home from bar... |
True... but when your wife is there, kind of puts a crimp into that.
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flomo
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: mashing potatoes
Posts: 878
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pics?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigred
Protect dog
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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Seriously here are my stripper rules, I've probably been to 10-12 clubs in my life for a total of 30-40 times. I did date a stripper when I lived in Vegas for about 6 weeks, yea, not as cool as you'd think. It sucks when a women who makes your weekly salary in a night won't pay for anything because she's so used to men taking care of everything. IM A BROKE-ASS GOLF PRO BITCH. I met her at a BBQ hosted by a member from my club, not at the strip club.
Anyways, here is what I can think off the top of my head from hanging out with her and her friends for a few months:
1. Do NOT treat them like they are a real person, guys that are nice to strippers are the ones that spend $200 to get a lap-dance in the VIP Room while some asshole just paid $40 for dome.
2. Do NOT ask them out, try to get their number, etc... They won't give you their number, and if they do give you a number, it won't be the right one. The only way to actually get it is if they offer it to you, but that means you broke rule #1 and were nice to them, so fuck you.
3. DO tip the Door-man/bouncer if you are a regular and there is no cover. If you're from out of town (usually paying a cover) and just there once I see no reason; however, it's always good to have the house on your side.
4. Do NOT hit on the cocktail waitresses, you're in a club staring a naked disgusting women, she is not going to find that attractive.
5. Do NOT wear a big clanky belt, should be self-explanatory.
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Alexos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Montreal
Posts: 2,766
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
some stripper - "heyyy there, my name is mary! *wink*"
some ftr guy - "oh, i don't care what your name is"
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good times
good times |
oh man that was a classic...
balla
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Nine to five is how to survive - I ain't trying to survive / I'm trying to live it to the limit and love it a lot //
Can offer RB deals on most sites, PM me.
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Monty3038
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Monty3038
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigred
Strip clubs bore me, I don't like what I can't touch...
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Ah yes, the old I don't like boobies line
You are going to too high class of a club if you can't touch.
Also, if you aren't attracted to what was at home (as it used to be for me years ago) you go for inspiration. |
Nope...rather take girls home from bar... |
True... but when your wife is there, kind of puts a crimp into that. |
It's my fault your stuck to one vagina for the rest of your life? 
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LOL OPERATIONS
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Galapogos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: The Loser's Lounge
Posts: 2,322
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
Quote:
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Originally Posted by allabout
I've heard this before and its so true...Its ok to date a stripper (recommended at least once), but never ever marry a stripper.
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I did, it's something I brag about when I'm drunk and regret when I'm sober. |
Haha she gave you a lifelong souvenir didn't she?
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by sauce123
I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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more like set me up to be sexually disappointed by every women I've slept with since her.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
more like set me up to be sexually disappointed by every women I've slept with since her.
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the clap will do that
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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