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spoonitnow's March Bullshit Thread

  
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:01 PM     Post subject: spoonitnow's March Bullshit Thread #1 (permalink)  
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 So here's today's bullshit topics:

Some fucker on 2+2 thinks I'm a bot and wants the program I use.

Almost nobody seems to think I can do 5 ptbb/100 over 100k hands of full ring 100nl this month, so obviously I have to pwn you all in the ass.

The new #flopturnriver and #ftr-poker fucking own.

Also does anyone do wire transfers to cash out? I've never been balla enough to consider it before but I might be soon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:03 PM #2 (permalink)  
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 Oh and I tilted off like 3 BI this morning, like the first time ever.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:05 PM #3 (permalink)  
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 (11:04:28 AM) HalvSame: spoon, on the one hand I think it's great that you put all your BS in one thread
(11:04:54 AM) HalvSame: on the other hand how are we supposed to know when theres something new and interesting in there
(11:05:02 AM) spoonNgrind: check it regularly obv
(11:05:09 AM) HalvSame: you should make a March Bullshit Cliff Notes thread at the end of the month
(11:05:10 AM) spoonNgrind: set it as your home page
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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bigspenda73
Old 03-04-2008, 03:13 PM #4 (permalink)  
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bigspenda73 will become famous soon enoughbigspenda73 will become famous soon enough
 I think you can do 4.85ptbb/100 but 5 is stretching it

Also, I might just sit at all of your tables and pwn you, to affect your winrate.
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:14 PM #5 (permalink)  
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 I flip g00t

PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em, $1.00 BB (9 handed) Poker-Stars Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

UTG+1 ($53.50)
MP1 ($21)
MP2 ($97)
MP3 ($109.50)
CO ($117)
Hero ($114.05)
SB ($42.50)
BB ($110.10)
UTG ($20)

Preflop: Hero is Button with K, A.
6 folds, Hero raises to $4, 1 fold, BB raises to $12, Hero raises to $33, BB raises to $110.1, Hero calls $77.10.

Flop: ($220.70) A, 6, 6 (2 players)

Turn: ($220.70) 4 (2 players)

River: ($220.70) J (2 players)

Final Pot: $220.70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:16 PM #6 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigspenda73
I think you can do 4.85ptbb/100 but 5 is stretching it

Also, I might just sit at all of your tables and pwn you, to affect your winrate.
Sheeeeeit dawg them bitch niggas can't see me
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:21 PM #7 (permalink)  
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 btw spenda get in irc if you're not at work or something k thx
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:29 PM #8 (permalink)  
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 (11:26:40 AM) wes_dishes: i cant continue with the mom jokes, i banned myself from them after saying one to a friend whos mom was dead
(11:26:50 AM) spoonNgrind: lol
(11:26:55 AM) spoonNgrind: was it like
(11:26:57 AM) AndyAKB_Grind: classy
(11:26:58 AM) spoonNgrind: blah blah i fucked your mom
(11:27:01 AM) spoonNgrind: and he was like my mom's dead
(11:27:04 AM) spoonNgrind: and you were like i mean before that
(11:27:16 AM) wes_dishes: no it was bad with gestures and everything
(11:27:25 AM) spoonNgrind: lol corpse gestures i hope
(11:27:59 AM) spoonNgrind: i'm jk obv
(11:28:22 AM) spoonNgrind: or was it like
(11:28:33 AM) spoonNgrind: i fucked your mom in the ass while doing a driveby in a buick with a fucking monkey
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:32 PM #9 (permalink)  
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 I'm not saying it didn't happen but if he was that close of a friend wouldn't you have known his mom died? Hmm.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 03:37 PM #10 (permalink)  
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 This kind of pissed me off

PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em, $1.00 BB (8 handed) Poker-Stars Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

SB ($27.30)
BB ($106.40)
UTG ($34.50)
Hero ($105.50)
MP1 ($221.15)
MP2 ($22)
CO ($96)
Button ($44.35)

Preflop: Hero is UTG+1 with A, J.
1 fold, Hero raises to $4, MP1 calls $4, 5 folds.

Flop: ($9.50) 2, T, K (2 players)
Hero bets $8, MP1 calls $8.

Turn: ($25.50) Q (2 players)
Hero bets $18, MP1 folds.

Final Pot: $25.50
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 04:34 PM #11 (permalink)  
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 I don't normally tap the glass but...

spoonitnow: simmer down over there short stack
Dealer: Game #15734986261: spoonitnow wins pot ($55.55) with a flush, Nine high
adam258: shut up over there idiot
spoonitnow: rofl
spoonitnow: you know what they say about guys with short stacks
adam258: u haven't made an intelligent play yet
spoonitnow: lol
Dealer: Game #15735026210: The greenfle wins pot ($5.75)
spoonitnow: at least i know how to buyin
adam258: pushing with AK and getting lucky
adam258: pushing with 67 and getting lucky
adam258: calling an all in with only A7 and getting lucky
spoonitnow: pushed your mom when i got lucky too
Dealer: Mazinho1977, it's your turn. You have 15 seconds to act
spoonitnow: lol @ my hourly > your stack
Dealer: Regular time for player Mazinho1977 has expired, TIME BANK has been activated
adam258: sounds like something someone of ur intelliegence would say
adam258: bc u been gettin lucky
adam258: ONLY reason
spoonitnow: lol k
adam258: no 1 knows who u r
adam258: cept U
spoonitnow: lol is that right
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 04:36 PM #12 (permalink)  
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 Dealer: Game #15735156975: MrKayling wins pot ($7.15)
adam258: nice to know u've dropped back limits.... been getting ur nuts handing to ya playing the way u r at $1/$2?
spoonitnow: lol i never dropped i always play both
Dealer: The greenfle has a pair of Nines
Dealer: Cooncoon has a pair of Aces
spoonitnow: and i'm still winning at both
Dealer: Game #15735172516: Cooncoon wins pot ($9.05) with a pair of Aces
adam258: bc u lucky
spoonitnow: tyvm
adam258: u have showed NOP skill whatsoever here
spoonitnow: lol k
adam258: u think u have?
adam258: when have u once?
spoonitnow: nah i just have a good bot
Dealer: Cooncoon has two pair, Nines and Sevens
Dealer: MrKayling has three of a kind, Sevens
Dealer: Game #15735188567: MrKayling wins pot ($11.45) with three of a kind, Sevens
Dealer: filyph will be allowed to play after the button
adam258: when have u once got the chips in with the best hand?
adam258: WHEN the chips went in... not on the end
spoonitnow: mike sexton says any two can win at no limit obv
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 04:53 PM #13 (permalink)  
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 btw the hands he said i got it in behind i had like 14+ outs on rofl
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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pgil
Old 03-04-2008, 05:26 PM #14 (permalink)  
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i think i joined that table right at the end of the conversation. i played like shit though
"If you can't say f*ck, you can't say f*ck the government" - Lenny Bruce
 
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bode
Old 03-04-2008, 05:28 PM #15 (permalink)  
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 its fun to tap the glass every once in a while.
Quote:
eeevees are not monies yet...they are like baby monies.
 
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b-rabbit
Old 03-04-2008, 06:13 PM #16 (permalink)  
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 adam258 totally pwned you
do the right thing.
 
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spoonitnow
Old 03-04-2008, 08:06 PM #17 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pgil
i think i joined that table right at the end of the conversation. i played like shit though
Yeah I saw you, but like two seconds later the table broke up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by b-rabbit
adam258 totally pwned you
Until I stacked him and he left the table.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.

Rule # 1: don't ask questions

Rule # 2: don't ask questions

I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
 
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Lukie
Old 03-04-2008, 08:37 PM #18 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by b-rabbit
adam258 totally pwned you
b rabbit totally pwned himself
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b-rabbit
Old 03-05-2008, 03:10 PM #19 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lukie
Quote:
Originally Posted by b-rabbit
adam258 totally pwned you
b rabbit totally pwned himself
lukie doesn't make sense. and therefore totally does not pwn.
do the right thing.
 
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