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Reidak
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04-12-2007, 04:01 AM
Post subject: So im shaving my balls, right...
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#1 (permalink)
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
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Epic
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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shaving FTW
haha @ getting caught
you shouldn't have claimed the best title cuz the whole reason I clicked on the thread was to say:
Best. Title. Ever.
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Lukie
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: back with a vengeance
Posts: 3,307
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ok shaving is good, but i try to shy away from the sack honestly
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Personally, i liked my balls being sucked. last thing i want is to see one of my love bristles flossed between my dates' front teeth.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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I have a theory relating to the correllation of amount of pubic hair vs. length in time between sexual activity.
It's just a theory though...
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Lukie
ok shaving is good, but i try to shy away from the sack honestly
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At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
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zook
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 3,676
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I cringed when I read this thread title. Nice work.
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Numbr2intheWorld
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Moderator
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,561
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
I have a theory relating to the correllation of amount of pubic hair vs. length in time between sexual activity.
It's just a theory though...
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And what is it?
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Galapogos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: The Loser's Lounge
Posts: 2,322
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Geez, get with the waxing boys.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by sauce123
I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Massimo
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
I have a theory relating to the correllation of amount of pubic hair vs. length in time between sexual activity.
It's just a theory though...
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And what is it? |
Hair and amount of sex are negatively correlated
i.e.- More hair=less sex
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Galapogos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: The Loser's Lounge
Posts: 2,322
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
i.e.- More hair=less head
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fyp
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by sauce123
I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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Im "up" for suggestions
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Galapogos
Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
i.e.- More hair=less head
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fyp |
My theory is not about how hair affects your levels of sexual activity rather how much sexual activity one has affects their grooming rituals.
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Miffed22001
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Marry Me Cheryl!!!
Posts: 8,181
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Lukie
ok shaving is good, but i try to shy away from the sack honestly
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QFT 
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pokadave
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: so.cal.
Posts: 7
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i never tried shaving my sack, im actually kinda scared to try... but im gonna try now considering alot of people have tried it...
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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For a smoother ride, do it in the shower, and wait at least 5 minutes for all the hair to soften up.
If your a first time baller (get it?)
(well, you should)
anyways slather on a bunch of your conditioner. Let it soak in for a half minute or so. shampoo ur head or soemthing during this time. This makes for a much cleaner, closer shave. Personally I go againts the grain but on the boys there isnt really any grain to go on so i go from bottom up.
Good luck
dont cough.
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jyms
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Tilting Mod
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 4,836
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I agree 100% with the theory spenda, big shaver here by the way Jishu. I'd stay away from claiming the rights to greatest thread ever though, LittleWashu is far and away the leader in that respect with his blog as noted by many respected FTR members.
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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Funnu, but
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Trainer_jyms
I'd stay away from claiming the rights to greatest thread ever though
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best thread title possibly ever
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zook
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 3,676
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This thread is so much better without pics.
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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I think some diagrams would benefit the community
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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And my claim was
best thread TITLE POSSIBLY ever
I know there are alot better posts out there, but when it comes to just the title this one was pretty good
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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Trip report in 20 minutes
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zook
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 3,676
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Address to give 911 if we don't hear back from you in half an hour?
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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lol @ people shaving their balls because of this thread. I think I'll start a poll...
{EDIT: done
http://www.flopturnriver.com/phpBB2/...oker-53478.htm
spenda, glad your journey ended safely}
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(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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Ok, Im back. Tougher than I expected. Jishu's tips were helpful and I managed to end the adventure unscathed.
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Thats awesome. I heave leared through pain and bleeding that if you try to shave it clean when its full grown youll ruin a couple good razors. Thats why u gotta clear the brush before you mow the lawn. Too many strokes will irritate it, and the conditioner trick makes it unbeleivably close and smooth. If you jsut use soap youll hurt yourself.
MORE REPORTS NEEDED
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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I don't use soap or anything. However, I can shave my face no prob just using hot water so I'm probably an exception.
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(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
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jyms
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Tilting Mod
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 4,836
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The conditioner is a great trick to use. I use it for my head and face as well. The cheaper the better. Try it for anything you shave.
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euphoricism
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Your place or my place
Posts: 3,610
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any tips for an electric razor and a face? I've always been a handheld razor guy, but I got a very nice electric razor as a gift -- its really fucking fast, but not very close...
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dsmrolla06
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Full House
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Bend IN
Posts: 724
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Against the grain is definately not the way to go anywhere below the belt...
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by dsmrolla06
Against the grain is definately not the way to go anywhere below the belt...
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I use a mach 3 fusion. Shitloada blades on it. The way i see it when i go with the grain I can never get it close enough. when i rub my hand on it its not smooth its really prickly going againts the grain. dont like it.
If you do it in the shower the steam and heat will oepn your ballicles (ball follicles), and then use conditioner to make it nice and smooth, let it soak in for extra smoothness. Doing this, you get a nice clean shear with no bleeding or pain
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Da GOAT
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Dublin
Posts: 4,308
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bigspenda73
Ok, Im back. Tougher than I expected. Jishu's tips were helpful and I managed to end the adventure unscathed.
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this is fucking so funny coz i read the post from the bottom up. i stopped reading upwards right there
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Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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whats wrong with shaving cream? Ive bled a couple of times, but I never felt it at all.
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jyms
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Tilting Mod
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 4,836
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by boostNslide's question
whats wrong with shaving cream?
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by answers his own question
Ive bled a couple of times,
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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the problem is. your bleeding.
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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hmm.. well maybe Ill try your fancy schmancy conditioner trick...
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Da GOAT
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Dublin
Posts: 4,308
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listens to the poet:
Inspired by a few experiences of me trying to shave my balls...
"Shaving My Balls" by Alexander The Poet
When I shave my balls,
I can never do it right
My pubic hair falls,
On both my thighs, left and right
I never shave close,
To my hairy scrotum flesh
And that really blows,
Because I can't feel as fresh
I know if I try,
To shave real close to my sac
I'll bleed and I'll cry,
Some pints of blood I will lack
The next time I shave,
I will not go near my balls
I am not that brave,
I am not that brave at all
THE END
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Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,040
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I'm going to shower right now, I'll report my results after.
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Response in haiku form
my balls need a shave
wow, that was really easy
smooth as eggs, baby!
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jyms
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Tilting Mod
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 4,836
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People, do not just let them hang and shave them. You have to stretch them, mold them and move them. Go slow until you are comfortable, and don't use a mirror. If youj can't just look down and shave them, you have other things that need addressing first and foremost. Short strokes and sharper razors are your best friends. And never go for baby bottom smooth on the first try. You will be at it for too long and get razor rash. don't struggle for every hair. You'll get the rest tomorrow. And don't shave your nuts and leave a shag carpet up to your navel. Trim that too, you don't need to shave this, but closer is better.
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Okay. I think its time to build on this topic.
Id like to share my secret for sculpting the perfect racing stripe. Its basically a long patch of that that goes from your shaft up to wherever ur pubic bone stops. if ur a baller you have hair from your navel down, its awesome when they are connected. awesome.
Anyways start with a good, close trim. Preferably with someone elses beard trimmer. Being evil is good. Then, in your shower, using the Jishu technique, shave the sides clean. try pulling the skin under your navel taught, up into your ribs, so the skin is fully stretched. this ensures a nice, clean line down the side. nothing looks worse than a butchered stripe.
if you notice you made it crooked, just shave it all off and try again next week.
Some rules for the stripe
1) dont show everyone how awesome it looks. Nobody cares. you can be arrested for this.
2) keep the thickness CLOSE to the size of your flaccid shaft. IVe tried thinner and larger and I asked (seriously, i did.) girl what they thought and they seemed to like it more when it was close to the size of my limp pee pee. maybe they were lying to me. i dont care. blowjobs rock.
3) dont talk about fight club
4) give it a try.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,545
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It's absolutely amazing to me how open this thread is with very little flaming. Pretty cool.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,040
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
I'm going to shower right now, I'll report my results after.
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Wow that went surprisingly well. I've never before been able to shave against the grain like that with cream, but with conditioner it worked magically. Jishu is the king of shaving your privates. It's silky smooth and bare as a babies bottom, and pics are available upon request, bigred.
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
I'm going to shower right now, I'll report my results after.
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Wow that went surprisingly well. I've never before been able to shave against the grain like that with cream, but with conditioner it worked magically. Jishu is the king of shaving his own privates, while sharing his knowledge of the craft with others. It's silky smooth and bare as a babies bottom, and pics are available upon request, bigred. |
FYP 
I won't shave other people's privates.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,040
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jishu
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
I'm going to shower right now, I'll report my results after.
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Wow that went surprisingly well. I've never before been able to shave against the grain like that with cream, but with conditioner it worked magically. Jishu is the king of shaving his own privates, while sharing his knowledge of the craft with others. It's silky smooth and bare as a babies bottom, and pics are available upon request, bigred. |
FYP
I won't shave other people's privates. |
Please?
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jishu
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
Quote:
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Originally Posted by givememyleg
I'm going to shower right now, I'll report my results after.
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Wow that went surprisingly well. I've never before been able to shave against the grain like that with cream, but with conditioner it worked magically. Jishu is the king of shaving his own privates, while sharing his knowledge of the craft with others. It's silky smooth and bare as a babies bottom, and pics are available upon request, bigred. |
FYP
I won't shave other people's privates. |
shaving a girl can be lots of fun...
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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gmml - no. sorry.
boost - touche.
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsl2SgAeoAk
discuss.
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dsmrolla06
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Full House
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Bend IN
Posts: 724
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Against the grain you have to worry about ingrown hairs a couple days later...
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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this thread is #$%#$^ing hilarious. Never in my life would I have expected to be so amused by a thread about shaving balls.
Jishu, you should change your location to "Being the King of Shaving your privates".
I'm not a fan of the racing stripe idea, but it's possible I'm too harry to pull it off. I tried shaving my chest once, that was a terrible idea. Looked dumb and I couldn't get it smooth.
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