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Andypandy
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08-26-2007, 02:03 AM
Post subject: Sex in the city?
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#1 (permalink)
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Straight
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Middle of Norway
Posts: 154
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Ok, I'm from Norway and quite drunk atm. so please bare over with my bad english. Now the clock is 03.50 am here in Norway and after 8 beers and 1 Jack Daniel I come up with a theory that has nothing to do with poker. And its all really bull...
I am for the moment singel, and of course keen to get laid as often as possible. This is the third night in a row I walk home alone (wednesday, friday and saturday), not good.
I have some mates that was with me tonight, they wanted to go out to a place for soccerfans. All the women there were ugly. Why?
ANDYS THEOREM 1: Some of the woman who are horny but unluckily for them quite ugly, are pretending to be intersted in soccer, just to get laid (there are 1:10 in favour of men being soccer supporters. That is easy dick for the chicks.
Then we went on to a new "Club", Fru Lundgrens, a sort of rock-place where rockdudes chill out with "rockchicks". Once again all the woman were ugly. Why?
ANDYS THEOREM 2: Some of the woman who are horny but unluckily ugly by the will of nature, are pretendig to be interested in heavy-rock (which we all know are made only for men with a black jacket and a hard-0n). That is, once again, easy dick for the chicks.
So the conclusion of these to theorems:
ANDYS 3, and final THEOREM: Do not visit soccer-pubs or rock-pubs late at weekends-nights if U want to get laid with a chick not looking like a whalrus, also do not visit the most fancy clubs 'cause they all contains of cocky chicks who just want to show-off or fool u (we in Norway call those "Luremus"). Try to find something in between, which contains horny chicks, though slim. Try to get all-in as fast as possible. DO NOT slowplay. Also, dont checkraise if u dont mean it. And remember, three of a kind is the nuts...
Now discuss.
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Seasider
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Flush
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Bangor UK
Posts: 563
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most girls suck, what about when u have KK and (oh NO) there is an ace on the flop?
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Andypandy
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Straight
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Middle of Norway
Posts: 154
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Quote:
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most girls suck, what about when u have KK and (oh NO) there is an ace on the flop?
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well, u check if ure IP, and bet if ure OOP, what is ure point?
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Jack Sawyer
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Old School
Posts: 2,535
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Mmm, Norse chicks...
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My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...
Quote:
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VHS is like a book and a book is like a stack of kindles.
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Hey, I'm in a movie!
http://youtu.be/lGdnIrRKDTI
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Ash256
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08-26-2007, 04:29 AM
Post subject: Re: Sex in the city?
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#5 (permalink)
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 1,760
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Andypandy
(we in Norway call those "Luremus")
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Shit, Luremus is the best word ever. Props.
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Halv
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pro crastinator
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: No hindsight for the blind.
Posts: 1,842
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Luremus 
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Jack Sawyer
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Old School
Posts: 2,535
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Hey andypandy, you should come to my island. The ugly:hot ratio is somewhere close to 9:91.
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My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...
Quote:
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VHS is like a book and a book is like a stack of kindles.
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Hey, I'm in a movie!
http://youtu.be/lGdnIrRKDTI
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larsmars
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3-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Norway
Posts: 101
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Quit school and come to Bangkok with me, mate. Lots of slim chicks and no luremus. Queens might be a drag over there, but they still beat JK off IMO.
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Andypandy
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Straight
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Middle of Norway
Posts: 154
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
Hey andypandy, you should come to my island. The ugly:hot ratio is somewhere close to 9:91.
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Which island is that?
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Jack Sawyer
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Old School
Posts: 2,535
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Fire Google Earth.
Go to 12DEG10'52.07" N, 65DEG58'39.50"W.
It's called Curacao.
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My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...
Quote:
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VHS is like a book and a book is like a stack of kindles.
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Hey, I'm in a movie!
http://youtu.be/lGdnIrRKDTI
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IowaSkinsFan
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 7,148
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wtf is all this euro talk!!!!
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Halv
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pro crastinator
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: No hindsight for the blind.
Posts: 1,842
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by IowaSkinsFan
wtf is all this euro talk!!!!
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Dude neither Bangkok or Curacao is in Europe. (yea I know norway is ldo)
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IowaSkinsFan
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 7,148
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by HalvSame
Quote:
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Originally Posted by IowaSkinsFan
wtf is all this euro talk!!!!
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Dude neither Bangkok or Curacao is in Europe. (yea I know norway is ldo) |
I was being sarcastic because some of the jargon is so foreign to me (and it's a stereotypically "stupid American" thing to say).
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Halv
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pro crastinator
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: No hindsight for the blind.
Posts: 1,842
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NOWAI!
Sarcasm in an online forum, what's next?
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Halv
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pro crastinator
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: No hindsight for the blind.
Posts: 1,842
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A picture to illustrate, that's what!
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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Sarcasm? Reallll mature guys....reaaaallllll mature
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LOL OPERATIONS
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
Hey andypandy, you should come to my island. The ugly:hot ratio is somewhere close to 9:91.
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jack the last chick in your avatar was 10x hotter than the one you have now.
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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Jack Sawyer
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Old School
Posts: 2,535
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Really? I like this one way more. Hang on, I'll see what I can do.
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My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...
Quote:
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VHS is like a book and a book is like a stack of kindles.
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Hey, I'm in a movie!
http://youtu.be/lGdnIrRKDTI
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Jack Sawyer
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Old School
Posts: 2,535
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How about this one
<-------------------------
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My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...
Quote:
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VHS is like a book and a book is like a stack of kindles.
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Hey, I'm in a movie!
http://youtu.be/lGdnIrRKDTI
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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still not as hot imo, but i approve! that last chick had a weird face or something, idk. i give it an A!
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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