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This refer to anyone here? I Think SO!!!

  
 
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Tim Vecchioni
Old 09-29-2005, 02:51 PM     Post subject: This refer to anyone here? I Think SO!!! #1 (permalink)  
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This is a true story from the WordPerfect helpline. The help desk employee featured in this story was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause."

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee with a caller:

"Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor, I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well then, look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

"... ...Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

"No."


"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

"... ...Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

"No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Ah, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."
back looking to make some moolah
 
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Old 09-29-2005, 03:25 PM #2 (permalink)  
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ihategnomes
Old 09-29-2005, 03:39 PM #3 (permalink)  
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It was really funny back in 1997 too.
Field mice are fast, but owls can see in the dark.
<Bbickes> i still wanna know if the thing in your avatar is a real chick or not
<Bbickes> or am i e-crushing a dude
 
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UG
Old 09-29-2005, 05:46 PM #4 (permalink)  
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ohh man 1997 what a year


 
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koolmoe
Old 09-29-2005, 06:42 PM #5 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ihategnomes
It was really funny back in 1997 too.
It was really funny back in 1987.

Noobs.
Poker is freedom
 
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Laeelin
Old 09-29-2005, 07:40 PM #6 (permalink)  
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Actually, thats not funny at all....

/shudder

Talk about bad memories...

<---- Ex-Aol tech support

pps: If anyone thinks that the above is made up, i'm 100% sure that while that exact situation might not be true, that has happened. (I've had calls that bad)

Q. Is poker Gambling?
A. Do you use correct bankroll management?
 
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bencathers
Old 09-29-2005, 08:58 PM #7 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Laeelin
Actually, thats not funny at all....

/shudder

Talk about bad memories...

<---- Ex-Aol tech support

pps: If anyone thinks that the above is made up, i'm 100% sure that while that exact situation might not be true, that has happened. (I've had calls that bad)
what's worse.. a bad beat or a bad call
Dealer: bencathers has two pair, Aces and Deuces
Dealer: Tbags has two pair, Kings and Jacks
Dealer: Tbags finished the tournament in 256th place
Tbags [observer]: another scumbag gets there on this site lol
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 09-29-2005, 09:27 PM #8 (permalink)  
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Dwarfman wasn't even born in 1997

-'rilla

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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ihategnomes
Old 09-29-2005, 09:58 PM #9 (permalink)  
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In 1997 I was working part-time on the weekends at a computer repair store. A lady came in asking if we could fix her drink coaster, as it wouldn't "stow away" like it used to.

FACT.
Field mice are fast, but owls can see in the dark.
<Bbickes> i still wanna know if the thing in your avatar is a real chick or not
<Bbickes> or am i e-crushing a dude
 
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TylerK
Old 09-30-2005, 12:10 AM #10 (permalink)  
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Tech support horror stories are always funny until they actually happen to you.

Man, I am glad I don't have to do that any more.
TylerK: its just gambling if i want to worry about money i'll go to work lol
 
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