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amir is cool
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11-03-2009, 06:26 AM
Post subject: pokerstars out-trolled me
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#1 (permalink)
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3-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: NY
Posts: 108
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so my friend sends me this like a week ago:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnL9_...eature=related
and today hes like "lol you should email pokerstars support and say "pokerstars, i regret to inform you that every villain is lemons"" and i decide to email them with this:
Quote:
To whom it may concern,
Hello. I have some troubling and disturbing news for the Pokerstars Support Team. It would behoove you to be very delicate and careful with this information, as I strongly suspect that the very fabric of the Pokerstars team has been compromised with corruption, and any information from this e-mail message that falls on corrupt ears can immediately alert them to the fact that their cover has been exposed. If this revelation hits the public too early there could be massive ramifications, including but not limited to: riots, social order collapse, headaches, nausea, blindness, earthquakes, hurricanes, the downfall of wal-mart, drought, widespread power-outage, and the disappearance of south Africa.
This information, while hard to believe, is verified by a professional shoemaker. Please brace yourself for extreme, life-changing information. If you are squeamish, you might want to get a bucket.
Recently, several pop-figures with secret agendas have formed an alliance of super-villains, including Barnacle Boy, The Dirty Bubble, Manray, Optimus Prime, Aquaman, The entire Power-Ranger team (including the megazord), George Clooney, Al Pacino, 50 Cent, Gucci Mane, Madonna, The Batmobile, Mr. T, and Samuel L Jackson. This team has named their alliance:
Every
Villain
Is
Lemons
Otherwise known as EVIL.
I hope that this email does its job to inform you of the extremely mischievous group going by "EVIL" and helps to give you warning about them, as they all love to gamble, and particularly like the game 3 card monte, it would be a good idea to watch your 3 card monte tables and keep a close look out for any one of the alliance. Be sure to keep a multi-vitamin handy, as this is their only weakness.
Your Friend and Business Assosciate,
Skidward
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i obviously didnt expect a response back but 20 mins later i get this
Quote:
Hello,
We have forwarded your email to a Support Supervisor for their review and
response. You will receive a reply as soon as possible.
Your patience is appreciated.
Regards,
Allen
PokerStars Support Team
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followed by this a while later:
Quote:
Hello Skidward,
Thank you for contacting PokerStars.
Allow me to start by thanking you for the time that you took to deliver
your ominous
warning to us. Let me assure you that there has been no corruption; every
PokerStars
employee values the integrity of our site as paramount and we pride
ourselves on our
sterling reputation.
My sources indicate that since you sent your e-mail to us we been
fortunate enough to
avoid any widespread rioting or social upheaval. These same sources also
indicate that
the country of South Africa is still very much existent.
I must admit that I did find your news to be disturbing to say the least;
the fact that
this information has been independently verified by one adept in the
cobbler's art only
lends greater weight and import to the matter. Verily, the destruction
that a nefarious
cohort comprising of Mr. T, the Power Rangers and Samuel L. Jackson could
potentially
unleash is a thought too ghastly to contemplate.
This however, would pale in comparison to the catastrophe that would be a
musical
collaboration between Madonna and 50 Cent. As I reflected on this last
thought, I was
glad to have taken your advice to have a bucket in close proximity, as the
nausea was
truly overpowering.
Rest assured that in order to combat the menace presented by the group
known as EVIL, we
have assembled a group of our finest Poker Specialists. For obvious
reasons, we are
unable to divulge the identities of the members this super-heroic vanguard
against the
forces of EVIL, suffice to say that they choose to be collectively
identified by the
following name:
Super-Poker Specialists
That
Always
Run
Sick
In the face of such a valiant group of heroic defenders, the forces of
EVIL do not stand
a chance. While we do not currently offer Three-card Monte on our site, in
the very
unlikely event that we offer it at some stage in the future, we will
surely be on the
lookout for members of EVIL.
I trust that I have adequately addressed your concerns. Please feel free
to contact us
if there is anything else we can help you with, as we are available 24
hours a day to
assist you. If the matter is especially urgent, do not hesitate to use the
STARS signal
(red spade logo projected over the city skyline).
Thank you for choosing PokerStars and best of luck at the tables!
Regards,
Aaron A
PokerStars Support Team
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well played aaron a. well played.
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Quote:
[21:38] <dranger> WTF HAPPENED WHEN I WENT TO BOOT CAMP
[21:40] <kiwiMark> THERE IS A NEW PRESIDENT OF THE UNITES STATES CALLED BARACK OBAMA AND HE'S NOT VERY WHITE
[21:40] <kiwiMark> THIS IS NOT A LEVEL.
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Play for FREE and practice your game at...
Join the FTR Poker Forum to disable these banners and start posting!
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tomato paste carnage
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Straight
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: in a van down by the river
Posts: 115
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Aaron A just stacked you irl.
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JKDS
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Full House
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chandler, AZ
Posts: 1,024
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omfg i loled irl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OngBonga
But no, jkds is lolvillager and anyone who wants to string him up is sighbad.
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BankItDrew
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Losing Prop Bets
Posts: 2,789
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Winnars in this thread.
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Girlfriend: Why are the werewolves more important than living life?!
Girlfriend: Are you on the forums doing the werewolves again?
Girlfriend: Soo... you forgot to run that errand, but you had time to werewolf? Wtf?
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Parasurama
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Full House
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: DMT
Posts: 820
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Man, I hate to be a grammar nazi, but "comprising of" totally killed my flow
otherwise lols
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bode
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Straight Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: slow motion
Posts: 4,270
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on a scale of 1 to tommy chong, how high were you when you wrote the initial email?
awesome response from stats though.
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Quote:
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eeevees are not monies yet...they are like baby monies.
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KillsAids
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Straight
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Paris, France
Posts: 120
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awesomeness itt
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by bode
on a scale of 1 to tommy chong, how high were you when you wrote the initial email?
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haha, FTR must know
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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spoonitnow
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: IRC Chat Room
Posts: 5,406
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Where is the mspaint from stars support
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.
Rule # 1: don't ask questions
Rule # 2: don't ask questions
I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
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BooG690
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,439
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OMGYES. GREAT THREAD. AMIRWINSTHEINTERNET.
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That's how winners play; we convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.
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Stacks
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Im opedipus bitch, the original balla.
Posts: 2,605
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Man I love Stars.. I bet FTP sends back a form letter stating that "Everything is perfectly fine.. Do not worry". Stars tells us da truf!
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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haha!
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Get your own badge! Click profile at the top and FTR Badge from the left nav.
"The Dragon in My Garage" by Carl Sagan
I say onto you, I've felt the dragon! I felt the touch of his tail, the breath of his fire, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that the dragon exists!
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by spoonitnow
Where is the mspaint from stars support
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the drawing of the dungeon was just as funny imo.
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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triumphant cracker
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Straight
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!!!!
Posts: 184
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that..is utterly lolz worth.
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triumphant cracker
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Straight
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER!!!!
Posts: 184
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and..that reminds me of o book i read...."letters from a nut". by ted l. nancy. it as well is very lol.
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Ragnar4
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Billings, Montana
Posts: 1,284
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Re-Troll from another member
In which you send the picture of the Poker Stars Dungeon that is full of gold, and suggest that they turn that into their "Stars Cave" along with a few suggestions as to where they could put all the money that had been displaced.
Send them a picture of your house with an empty dungeon that could use some gold, along with pictures of lasers on top of the house to protect from would-be thiefs.
GO GO GO.
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The older I get, the more I start wondering; Just what in the hell is going on here? 
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BooG690
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Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,439
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This thread is so classic...I've chosen to bump it.
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That's how winners play; we convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.
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05-26-2012, 03:08 PM Australia Legalized Online Poker coming up in next 6 to 12 Months
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