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Tiresman
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07-27-2009, 06:59 PM
Post subject: Man, I got Leveled
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#1 (permalink)
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Two Pair
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 36
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I've been stopping at the titty bar 3 nights a week on my way home from work, and BSing with the smokin' hot barmaid. After about a month, she asks me if I'm married. Being totally honest up front, I tell her yes I am married. She says "That's too bad, you seem like such a nice guy, I wanted to fix you up with my mother."
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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she's lying to avoid being too vulnerable around you.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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BankItDrew
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Losing Prop Bets
Posts: 2,789
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backhanded compliment imo
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Girlfriend: Why are the werewolves more important than living life?!
Girlfriend: Are you on the forums doing the werewolves again?
Girlfriend: Soo... you forgot to run that errand, but you had time to werewolf? Wtf?
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BennyLaRue
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07-27-2009, 08:24 PM
Post subject: Re: Man, I got Leveled
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#4 (permalink)
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Tiresman
I've been stopping at the titty bar 3 nights a week on my way home from work, and BSing with the smokin' hot barmaid. After about a month, she asks me if I'm married. Being totally honest up front, I tell her yes I am married. She says "That's too bad, you seem like such a nice guy, I wanted to fix you up with my mother."
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Maybe Mom is 36 and MILFy.
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bikes
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a hot damn mess
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 2,449
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
she's lying to avoid being too vulnerable around you.
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+1 obv
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I damage threads that may actually benefit some posters
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Ragnar4
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Billings, Montana
Posts: 1,284
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So; is our lesson here: Next time, lie through your teeth.
edited to fix spelling.
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The older I get, the more I start wondering; Just what in the hell is going on here? 
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mrhappy333
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hartford, CT
Posts: 1,078
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Just tell her its OK, your in an OPEN relationship. 
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3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,042
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what's the level, her mom is prolly hot
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OP
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Straight
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Iso'ing Iso's
Posts: 117
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It is our duty as men to fuc k every single, single mom and/or cougar possible.
The same way we HAVE to blankly stare at a lit grill. It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity. I can't do it all on my own!
You sir have broken certain codes of being a man and may God have mercy on your soul.
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bikes
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a hot damn mess
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 2,449
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fucking epic post.
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I damage threads that may actually benefit some posters
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Tiresman
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Two Pair
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 36
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by BankItDrew
backhanded compliment imo
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This post made me feel better.
And to OP. Good thing you're a SEMINOLE fan or I mighta got pissed at your post. 
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OP
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Straight
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Iso'ing Iso's
Posts: 117
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Did you just call me gay?
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by OP
It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity.
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 ?
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
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wufwugy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,660
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by OP
It is our duty as men to fuc k every single, single mom and/or cougar possible.
The same way we HAVE to blankly stare at a lit grill. It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity. I can't do it all on my own!
You sir have broken certain codes of being a man and may God have mercy on your soul.
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I'd like to hear more about what guys have to do
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OP
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Straight
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Iso'ing Iso's
Posts: 117
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Not in the milf pic thread. Maybe some other time in another thread grasshopper
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wufwugy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,660
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Grasshopper? Im like a million years old. I just wanna know more about how we have to stare at grill flame and such.
Like we have to de-clothe Barbies or have to ooh and aww whenever being shown a gun or large knife. Start a new thread and enlighten us
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OP
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Straight
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Iso'ing Iso's
Posts: 117
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If you don't like cougar pussy and are offended by my statement due to some kind of conflicting homosexuality issues, its cool man. I'm an open minded person, I'm not gonna judge you. No need to just randomly be a dick though guy.
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wufwugy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,660
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I'm not being sarcastic. Your post was a pretty awesome one, and I wanted more. Like aboogorilla said, I lack social graces. Well, I don't IRL, just on the internet. So if I made you feel like I was being a dick, I'm sorry
My internet 'growing up' involved a forum full of dickheads who did nothing but tell each other to go fuck themselves. I've actually toned it down a bit since then, but not enough obv. Is now the right time for emoticons?     
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surviva316
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Confusing people with my liberal biblicisms
Posts: 1,625
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
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is it possible to put a paper bag over someone's policies, so that they're more bangable?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BooG690
I just wanted to share singing vaginas.  |
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ChrisBCritter
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Full House
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Falmouth, ME
Posts: 781
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TLA_f7S0cw
I approve of this thread.
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Hey knucklehead! Bonk!
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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LOL OPERATIONS
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flomo
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: mashing potatoes
Posts: 878
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bigred
Protect dog
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Those last two are kinda GILFy. I was thinking more:
and
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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damn OP, he called you a seminole fan. That's WORSE than being called gay.
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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swiggidy
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07-30-2009, 02:55 AM
Post subject: Re: Man, I got Leveled
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#26 (permalink)
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Tiresman
I've been stopping at the titty bar 3 nights a week on my way home from work, and BSing with the smokin' hot barmaid. After about a month, she asks me if I'm married. Being totally honest up front, I tell her yes I am married. She says "That's too bad, you seem like such a nice guy, I wanted to fix you up with my mother."
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Lukie?
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(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
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Warpe
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Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Canuckistan
Posts: 3,905
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
?
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
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GMILF thread?
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Lucothefish
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Cretaceous Park
Posts: 701
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This thread delivers.
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<@d0zer> how will you learn if I don't berate you harshly?
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Warpe
Quote:
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Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
?
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
Also, I demand this become the MILF pics thread.
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GMILF thread? |
With Sophia Loren, I was testing the limits of OP's theory: "It is our obligation to satisfy every woman over 35, under 160lbs, with atleast mildly attractive features when given the opportunity."
She's over 35, under 160 lbs (probably) with huge tits and other mildly attractive features. But, personally, she's a GMIWNLF for me. Does that make me less a man?
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GatorJH
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: HotLanta
Posts: 3,179
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yes it does. I would hit that in a hearbeat.
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Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by GatorJH
yes it does. I would hit that in a hearbeat.
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Yeah, but aren't you almost her age? I need OP's opinion.
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wufwugy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,660
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by BennyLaRue
Quote:
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Originally Posted by GatorJH
yes it does. I would hit that in a hearbeat.
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Yeah, but aren't you almost her age? I need OP's opinion. |
Dude stop being such a prick
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OP
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Straight
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Iso'ing Iso's
Posts: 117
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Meh, I've done worse
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BennyLaRue
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Full House
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 646
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by wufwugy
Dude stop being such a prick
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Stop randomly being a dick.
OP was right!
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Tiresman
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Two Pair
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Florida
Posts: 36
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by OP
Meh, I've done worse
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I'm sure you have.
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bikes
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a hot damn mess
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 2,449
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this thread does not deliver
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I damage threads that may actually benefit some posters
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Jack Sawyer
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Old School
Posts: 2,535
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Milf?
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My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...
Quote:
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VHS is like a book and a book is like a stack of kindles.
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Hey, I'm in a movie!
http://youtu.be/lGdnIrRKDTI
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Muzzard
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Cheshire, UK
Posts: 1,843
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