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a500lbgorilla
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04-14-2007, 06:22 AM
Post subject: College is epic
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#1 (permalink)
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
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Just came home. I was chilling downstairs with my friends for a poker night. Watching some movies, generally taking it easy. I come upstairs and there's some dude I never met and can't wake up.
We spend about 3 minutes trying to wake him up before he comes to and he's clearly blackout. He suggests that him not moving is best for everyone, I shrug and move my wii shit to my room.
I left him a trash can and a glass of water with a note that said "College rocks."
How am I doing so far?
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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P.S. Gabe you visiting tomorrow? Satisfaction guarenteed.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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Are his shoes on?
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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I tried to write balls on his face and he said "I know you're gonna write balls on my face but whatever"
So he sounds game.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
I tried to write balls on his face and he said "I know you're gonna write balls on my face but whatever"
So he sounds game.
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That's pretty borderline
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DaNutsInYoEye
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: St. Louis
Posts: 1,921
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horrible
1) get a black sharpie and write shit on his face
2) pull down his pants (and his boxers if you're a total asshole and/or gay)
3) why does the white boy have a bandana? obviously for you to tie his feet toegther.
4) get a couple condoms (i'm sure you dont have any 'rilla so ask a roommate) and spit into in them. lay one across his face and put another one down his pants.
5) the poor kid obviously can't afford to pay for a haircut so do him a favor and break out the clippers.
6) tea bag him
7) take pictures while doing all of the above
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TheXianti: (Triptanes) why are you not a thinking person?
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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Quote:
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4) get a couple condoms (i'm sure you dont have any 'rilla so ask a roommate) and spit into in them. lay one across his face and put another one down his pants.
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Powerful
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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givememyleg
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WHO YA GONNA CALL?!??
Administrator
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: ISHPERMING MISHIGEN
Posts: 5,041
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
I tried to write balls on his face and he said "I know you're gonna write balls on my face but whatever"
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haha! this is great
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Galapogos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: The Loser's Lounge
Posts: 2,322
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by DaNutsInYoEye
6) tea bag him
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Haha, this is key.
After hockey the boys and I would always go hard at the bar after. The party would go on at one of the guys house until as late as 11am the majority of the time. So obviously there would the those that didn't make it. The first guy to hit the couch would get tea bagged without fail every time. By the end of the season his fridge was literally covered with photos of the weak ones being victimized.
And the sharpie marker stuff is always classic too. Nothing better than dropping off one of the guys at their parent's house (if they lived with them) and picturing him walking in on the family breakfast with "I <3 cock" written on his forehead.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by sauce123
I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
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mrhappy333
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hartford, CT
Posts: 1,078
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I always liked to shave eyebrows off
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3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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I ended up only putting an empty condom in his pocket. I'm a stickler for the subtle jokes. I woke up this morning to talk to the fucker and take him home and he's gone. Left his bandana.
My roommate, a redneck who can best be described as someone who believes you should inconvenience you day to make his better, probably got home and just kicked the guy out while he was still probably really fucked up. I don't know what happened, but that's my guess.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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pgil
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Full House
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 1,103
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isnt teabagging an unconscious person a form of rape, or sexual misconduct at best (plus a little gay)? just a question.
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"If you can't say f*ck, you can't say f*ck the government" - Lenny Bruce
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mrhappy333
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hartford, CT
Posts: 1,078
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by pgil
isnt teabagging an unconscious person a form of rape, or sexual misconduct at best (plus a little gay)? just a question.
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IMO,Yes and Yes
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3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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teabagging is just gay unless you're teabagging a chick.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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chardrian
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I rarely,if ever, get pms
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 4,524
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haha - I'm gonna pretend I'm in lawschool again.
Wis. Stat. Sec. 940.225(2)(cm): Whoever does any of the following is guilty of a Class C felony:
(cm) Has sexual contact ... with a person who is under the influence of an intoxicant to a degree which renders that person incapable of appraising the person's conduct, and the defendant knows of such condition.
Putting your scrot or dong on someone's face = sexual contact in WI.
Class C felony = up to 40 years in prison.
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DaNutsInYoEye
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: St. Louis
Posts: 1,921
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by pgil
isnt teabagging an unconscious person a form of rape, or sexual misconduct at best (plus a little gay)? just a question.
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yes. jaywalking is illegal too.
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TheXianti: (Triptanes) why are you not a thinking person?
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mrhappy333
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Full House
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hartford, CT
Posts: 1,078
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Some guys (3or4)at UCONN in CT just recently all wacked off onto some drunk passed out chicks face, they all got off easy. some misdeameanor BS.Because they didn't touch her.
They just changed the law because of this to a Felony.
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3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
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chardrian
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I rarely,if ever, get pms
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 4,524
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by DaNutsInYoEye
Quote:
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Originally Posted by pgil
isnt teabagging an unconscious person a form of rape, or sexual misconduct at best (plus a little gay)? just a question.
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yes. jaywalking is illegal too. |
true but jaywalking is not a felony. In most jurisdictions it is merely an ordinance violation (i.e. you get a ticket).
btw - I am making absolutely no claim as to whether or not teabagging should be punished. I can see the humor in it. The problem comes when the teabaggee doesn't take too kindly to it. Most prosecutors are a little more handcuffed than you think. If a valid charge comes to them (it's usually from a police report, but a citizen can issue a complaint as well) they need a damn good reason not to charge the person. I just know that if I was an ADA and this came across my desk, I would charge 2nd degree sex assault first and then worry about lesser charges, plea bargains later.
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Reidak
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Flush
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Toronto
Posts: 566
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Im kind of suprised that nobody has put a blue helmet on that guy yet.
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DaNutsInYoEye
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: St. Louis
Posts: 1,921
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by chardrian
Quote:
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Originally Posted by DaNutsInYoEye
Quote:
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Originally Posted by pgil
isnt teabagging an unconscious person a form of rape, or sexual misconduct at best (plus a little gay)? just a question.
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yes. jaywalking is illegal too. |
true but jaywalking is not a felony. In most jurisdictions it is merely an ordinance violation (i.e. you get a ticket).
btw - I am making absolutely no claim as to whether or not teabagging should be punished. I can see the humor in it. The problem comes when the teabaggee doesn't take too kindly to it. Most prosecutors are a little more handcuffed than you think. If a valid charge comes to them (it's usually from a police report, but a citizen can issue a complaint as well) they need a damn good reason not to charge the person. I just know that if I was an ADA and this came across my desk, I would charge 2nd degree sex assault first and then worry about lesser charges, plea bargains later. |
I completely understand and agree it should be that way to protect people from sexual assualt and in general I think the legal system is too lenient on people that commit sexual crimes. That said, I think the vast majority of incidents involving tea bagging are intended as pranks. I would never consider doing it to anyone that I didn't both know very well and also know that they would take it as a joke. In that sense I don't see it as any worse than writing on their face with a marker.
As for the guys that masterbated on the unconscious girl's face, I don't think there is any question that that is assualt. At least the law was changed in response.
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TheXianti: (Triptanes) why are you not a thinking person?
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gabe
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: trying to live
Posts: 7,964
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rilla u should have called and i might have rolled down there
is it too late?? i could go for a drive
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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we're having a suits and sloots party. it's like a formal. I'm gonna get beyond shitfaced drunk but you atleast have to try to dress up so you might not be feelin it.
But you can def come if you want to. If you show up, i'll use the 150 you owe me for a bottle of dom.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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gabe
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: trying to live
Posts: 7,964
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ok nvm then
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ensign_lee
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: The University of TEXAS at Austin
Posts: 2,237
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wtf is teabagging?
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swiggidy
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Waiting in the shadows ...
Posts: 3,777
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by ensign_lee
wtf is teabagging?
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lol
urbandictionary FTW
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=teabag
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(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
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Galapogos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: The Loser's Lounge
Posts: 2,322
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
teabagging is just gay unless you're teabagging a chick.
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It's only gay if you're the one being tea bagged.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by sauce123
I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Galapogos
Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
teabagging is just gay unless you're teabagging a chick.
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It's only gay if you're the one being tea bagged. |
or if its some sort of elaborate fancy tea baggery performed in space or an anti gravity chamber in which you both simultaneously teabag one another touching balls.
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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its also gay if your balls are touching another man.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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Galapogos
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4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: The Loser's Lounge
Posts: 2,322
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
its also gay if your balls are touching another man.
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Lol, you crazy kids. You don't make contact, it's all about the photo op.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by sauce123
I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
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Benoso
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Straight
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Wales, UK
Posts: 157
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Please tell me that crossing the road in somewhere that isn't 'designated' isn't an offence in America.
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
its also gay if your balls are touching another man.
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dude, wtf.. its common knowledge that its not gay unless balls touch. That clearly means your set touches his set. For example, you can get head from a guy, and he can orally please your testicles, but that doesnt make you gay. Him, maybe? But I mean, youre just getting a blow job...
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bigspenda73
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Straight Flush
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Pwnsylvania
Posts: 7,546
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Benoso
Please tell me that crossing the road in somewhere that isn't 'designated' isn't an offence in America.
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jay-walking is a misdemeanor.
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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its weird though, in some places people strictly obey this law. For example, every time Im in cali, I get really weirded out because there will be absolutely no traffic, and no one will cross without the walk symbol. Then when I walk, they all look at me weird.
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a500lbgorilla
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JESUS TAKE THE KEYBOARD
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: This room is a good place to be
Posts: 8,379
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by boostNslide
Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
its also gay if your balls are touching another man.
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dude, wtf.. its common knowledge that its not gay unless balls touch. That clearly means your set touches his set. For example, you can get head from a guy, and he can orally please your testicles, but that doesnt make you gay. Him, maybe? But I mean, youre just getting a blow job... |
Getting blown by another guy makes you gay.
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Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
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gabe
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: trying to live
Posts: 7,964
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remember on south park when cartman put butter's cock in his mouth and took a picture so he could show everyone how gay butters was?
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boost
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Full House
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Chicago
Posts: 706
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
Quote:
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Originally Posted by boostNslide
Quote:
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Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
its also gay if your balls are touching another man.
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dude, wtf.. its common knowledge that its not gay unless balls touch. That clearly means your set touches his set. For example, you can get head from a guy, and he can orally please your testicles, but that doesnt make you gay. Him, maybe? But I mean, youre just getting a blow job... |
Getting blown by another guy makes you gay. |
so me, some friends and this mexican guy danny that we hung out with sometimes are driving to this party. We had to drive through boys town to get there and it was saturday night. Its raining men. Someone points out one that is wearing some really flamboyant shit, think leather chaps with a thong and a pink boa. We all laugh and cringe, but danny, not danny... Danny gets this kinda angry voice and is like, "man, if I got the chance I would push that fags shit in, push it in til it hurt, Id turn that queer straight homes!"
That was a pretty awkward moment of stunned silence afterwards..
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Harry
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Full House
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Philly
Posts: 722
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Danny's got some issues.
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PSU Class of 2011 weeeeeeee!
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bigred
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PROFESSIONAL TROLL
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Nest of Douchebags
Posts: 2,184
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Did anyone see the recent south park where Cartman goes "so last night i took a picture of butters with his penis in my mouth. Butters is totally gay now" This thread made me think of that.
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