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This is the thread where newbie plays go to die.

  
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:24 AM     Post subject: This is the thread where newbie plays go to die. #1 (permalink)  
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Post plays you're not going to make while really learning the game (i.e., you're a n00b)

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:24 AM #2 (permalink)  
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Open limping

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:24 AM #3 (permalink)  
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min-raising

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:25 AM #4 (permalink)  
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bluffing calling stations

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:27 AM #5 (permalink)  
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slow playing

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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Warpe
Old 07-17-2008, 02:29 AM #6 (permalink)  
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 folding KK preflop



 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:33 AM #7 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Warpe
folding KK preflop
nice

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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Deanglow
Old 07-17-2008, 02:43 AM #8 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
Quote:
Originally Posted by Warpe
folding KK preflop
nice
PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em, $4 BB (6 handed) Poker-Stars Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

Hero ($559.70)
Button ($406.80)
SB ($541.70)
BB ($400)
UTG ($891.40)
MP ($339.75)

Preflop: Hero is CO with K, K.
5 folds.

Final Pot: $6
 
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 02:54 AM #9 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deanglow
Quote:
Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
Quote:
Originally Posted by Warpe
folding KK preflop
nice
PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em, $4 BB (6 handed) Poker-Stars Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

Hero ($559.70)
Button ($406.80)
SB ($541.70)
BB ($400)
UTG ($891.40)
MP ($339.75)

Preflop: Hero is CO with K, K.
5 folds.

Final Pot: $6
$0.1/$0.25 No Limit Holdem
9 players
Converted at weaktight.com

Stacks:
UTG Stolzie420 ($15.75)
UTG+1 tommywiss420 ($11.15)
MP1 ZeeRaX ($25.00)
MP2 rexzizo ($80.30)
MP3 Jaguar ($25.00)
CO PokerJohnM3 ($12.50)
BTN badshiba ($42.55)
SB jerrysak ($11.90)
BB Hero ($32.80)
[Jaguar posted $0.25]

Pre-flop: ($0.60, 9 players) Hero is BB
4 folds, Jaguar raises to $1.50, PokerJohnM3 calls $1.50, badshiba calls $1.50, 1 fold, Hero folds

Flop: ($4.85, 3 players)
Jaguar bets $3.75, PokerJohnM3 calls $3.75, 1 fold

Turn: ($12.35, 2 players)
Jaguar bets $3.75, PokerJohnM3 calls $3.75

River: ($19.85, 2 players)
Jaguar bets $5.50, PokerJohnM3 goes all-in $3.50

Final Pot: $26.85
Jaguar shows:
PokerJohnM3 shows:

Jaguar wins $25.60 ( won +$11.10 )
PokerJohnM3 lost -$12.50
badshiba lost -$1.50

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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Chopper
Old 07-17-2008, 03:49 AM #10 (permalink)  
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-checking my set until the turn on flushy flops. i suppose that falls under "slowplaying."

-light squeeze plays.
LHE is a game where your skill keeps you breakeven until you hit your rush of random BS.

Nothing beats flopping quads while dropping a duece!
 
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JKDS
Old 07-17-2008, 03:54 AM #11 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OngBonga View Post
But no, jkds is lolvillager and anyone who wants to string him up is sighbad.
 
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AnTman_69
Old 07-17-2008, 06:13 AM #12 (permalink)  
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- bluffing bad players.

- 4 betting noobs coz i think there playing back at me.
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daven
Old 07-17-2008, 06:40 AM #13 (permalink)  
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 calling allins with aqs
calling big 3-bets oop with ak
woot woot KJs
don't raise with the straight flush bro, nobody ever gonna call that shit
allin, reload, repeat

please read: http://www.philgalfond.com/lets-make-some-changes/
 
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TLR
Old 07-17-2008, 07:20 AM #14 (permalink)  
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 limping SC and then calling all the way when hitting TPNK


 
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TLR
Old 07-17-2008, 07:20 AM #15 (permalink)  
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 Bashing other guys in chat for making bad plays


 
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daven
Old 07-17-2008, 08:45 AM #16 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TLR
Bashing other guys in chat for making bad plays
explaining in the chat why the play was bad and referring them to: websites, books, etc
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Da GOAT
Old 07-17-2008, 09:24 AM #17 (permalink)  
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min bet lead
Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
 
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AnTman_69
Old 07-17-2008, 10:53 AM #18 (permalink)  
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min- raising a min bet lead.
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oskar
Old 07-17-2008, 11:05 AM #19 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daven
explaining in the chat why the play was bad
guilty
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oskar
Old 07-17-2008, 11:06 AM #20 (permalink)  
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 Sitting down with 20bb and shoving any two face cards, then reload 20bb.
The strengh of a hero is defined by the weakness of his villains.
 
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oskar
Old 07-17-2008, 11:07 AM #21 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnTman_69
min- raising a min bet lead.
Raising a min-bet lead on a bluff.
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 11:39 AM #22 (permalink)  
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good stuff guys!

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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LuckySlevin
Old 07-17-2008, 12:03 PM #23 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daven
Quote:
Originally Posted by TLR
Bashing other guys in chat for making bad plays
explaining in the chat why the play was bad and referring them to: websites, books, etc
Classic
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Da GOAT
Old 07-17-2008, 01:10 PM #24 (permalink)  
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minbet 3 barrels
Jman: every time the action is to you, it's an opportunity for you to make the perfect play.
 
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oskar
Old 07-17-2008, 01:15 PM #25 (permalink)  
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 Bluffing into 3 or more players.
C-betting 99 on a TJA flop.
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Chopper
Old 07-17-2008, 02:18 PM #26 (permalink)  
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running a 100k "test" as a prop bet at 5NL instead of just moving up.

oh, and taking the prop bet, too.
LHE is a game where your skill keeps you breakeven until you hit your rush of random BS.

Nothing beats flopping quads while dropping a duece!
 
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Pythonic
Old 07-17-2008, 03:07 PM #27 (permalink)  
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Flat calling preflop raises with KK or AA when there are 2 other people in the hand.
Never bet on a white man in the heavyweight division!
 
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LuckySlevin
Old 07-17-2008, 03:23 PM #28 (permalink)  
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 Listening to thunders poker 'advice'.
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Warpe
Old 07-17-2008, 03:51 PM #29 (permalink)  
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 clicking on the auto fold checkbox when you're on the BTN



 
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Outlaw
Old 07-17-2008, 04:23 PM #30 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Warpe
clicking on the auto fold checkbox when you're on the BTN
Clicking auto-fold when in the BB.

Actually, make that never clicking autofold.. its a bad habit
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Outlaw
Old 07-17-2008, 04:29 PM #31 (permalink)  
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Playing with lots of distractions.

Examples:
On the phone
Watching kids
Wife aggro
Anything that takes 1% or more of your brain capacity to do while playing.
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JKDS
Old 07-17-2008, 04:30 PM #32 (permalink)  
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 feeler bets
Quote:
Originally Posted by OngBonga View Post
But no, jkds is lolvillager and anyone who wants to string him up is sighbad.
 
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ponyboy
Old 07-17-2008, 04:36 PM #33 (permalink)  
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Playing while:

Drunk
High
Pissed off at something or somebody else
On 2 hours of sleep
Hung over

For some of you I realize this means you can never play.
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sarbox68
Old 07-17-2008, 04:51 PM #34 (permalink)  
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1. Betting for no other reason than to find out where I iz
2. Ignoring what I find out when they raise my info bet and betting again on the next street to find out if i'm still there...
3. ...and well, fuck it, I'm pot committed now.....
 
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sil693
Old 07-17-2008, 04:56 PM #35 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LuckySlevin
Listening to thunders poker 'advice'.
wtf??

he told you calling/shoving or whatever it was deep in an MTT w nothing was a bad play and that you got lucky, which you did. you said you had a read, but he still showed up w the J or whatever and you were way behind when the money went in.

I'm gonna add to this list: thinking you're the shit just because you win a big pot, and therefore choose to disregard solid advice because your ego can't take "criticism" that is supposed to help you. wake up.
 
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FlyingSaucy
Old 07-17-2008, 05:06 PM #36 (permalink)  
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betting for information
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FlyingSaucy
Old 07-17-2008, 05:12 PM #37 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sarbox68
1. Betting for no other reason than to find out where I iz
I guess that covers mine. oops.
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FlyingSaucy
Old 07-17-2008, 05:21 PM #38 (permalink)  
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calling 3bets preflop just to prove you weren't stealing.
lol
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Outlaw
Old 07-17-2008, 07:14 PM #39 (permalink)  
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Letting my M get below 3.0
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d0zer
Old 07-17-2008, 07:18 PM #40 (permalink)  
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 Assuming that regs are always playing back at me when they 3bet from the blinds
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a500lbgorilla
Old 07-17-2008, 07:33 PM #41 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by d0zer
Assuming that regs are always playing back at me when they 3bet from the blinds
I 4bet so much money away in this spot lol

Smithers, use the amnesia ray.
You mean the revolver, sir?
Precisely.
 
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L_Clan_Sup3rMaN
Old 07-17-2008, 07:40 PM #42 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FlyingSaucy
calling 3bets preflop just to prove you weren't stealing.
lol
lol! +1

I know that feeling.
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d0zer
Old 07-17-2008, 07:44 PM #43 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
Quote:
Originally Posted by d0zer
Assuming that regs are always playing back at me when they 3bet from the blinds
I 4bet so much money away in this spot lol
Oh good, then I'm not alone
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Hawk
Old 07-17-2008, 09:18 PM #44 (permalink)  
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 Falling for the stack-a-donk line when I can only beat a bluff. (TP is no good!)

and
Quote:
Originally Posted by Outlaw
Playing with lots of distractions.
 
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ProZachNation
Old 07-17-2008, 10:12 PM #45 (permalink)  
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When you do what is correct and put an opponent on a range and the flop hit his range perfectly and you still shove the flop.... on the bubble in a MTT.... yeah no more of that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrhappy333
I didn't think its Bold to bang some chick with my bro. but i guess so... thats +EV in my book.
 
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Deanglow
Old 07-18-2008, 12:36 AM #46 (permalink)  
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 folding
 
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oskar
Old 07-18-2008, 12:48 AM #47 (permalink)  
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 Getting dealt in.
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sarbox68
Old 07-18-2008, 01:18 AM #48 (permalink)  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oskar
Getting dealt in.
lolzgettingdealtin

I would have saved big moniez early on had I avoided that one!
 
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Vrax
Old 07-30-2008, 06:49 AM #49 (permalink)  
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Potting whiffed overs into 4 morons.

Setfarming lightish threebettors.

Bargain-hunting from SB.

Putting someone on monster range, then calling his huge raise.

Re-re-re-bluffing.

Trying to move people off their unimproved Aces postflop.

Open-minraising SB vs BB.

Posting from early position.
"How could I call that bet? How could you MAKE that bet? It's poker not solitaire. " - that Gus Bronson guy
 
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JKDS
Old 07-30-2008, 06:58 AM #50 (permalink)  
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But no, jkds is lolvillager and anyone who wants to string him up is sighbad.
 
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