|
spoonitnow
|
09-21-2010, 11:07 PM
Post subject: ***OFFICIAL EXCUSES THREAD***
|
#1 (permalink)
|
|
Straight Flush
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: IRC Chat Room
Posts: 5,406
|
|
Everyone can post their excuses here.
|
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Ripptyde
I only have 2 simple rules when I am coaching a new student.
Rule # 1: don't ask questions
Rule # 2: don't ask questions
I have no interest in discussing strategy with a protege'. Your job is to remain quiet and listen. I have a very systematic approach that I will share with the right candidate and I promise that I will turn you into a force of nature and show you elements of the game of poker that you never knew existed.
|
|
Play for FREE and practice your game at...
Join the FTR Poker Forum to disable these banners and start posting!
|
|
BooG690
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,439
|
|
I found a ton of good ones here:
http://www.flopturnriver.com/pokerfo...op-182282.html
|
That's how winners play; we convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.
|
|
CBAT
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: NY
Posts: 831
|
|
I don't like money.
|
|
|
|
Imthenewfish
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: sites im allowed to play on
Posts: 945
|
|
my wrist cramps up
|
|
|
|
JKDS
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chandler, AZ
Posts: 1,024
|
|
I like not making money too much 
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by OngBonga
But no, jkds is lolvillager and anyone who wants to string him up is sighbad.
|
|
|
daven
|
|
Straight Flush
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: soaking up ethanol, moving on up
Posts: 5,805
|
|
top 9 at 9.
1 - i often play too many tables
2 - i don't study enough
3 - i play when i know i'm prone to tilting, rather than study or go do something cool and unrelated to poker
4 - i forget that calling is dumb
5 - i make decisions too quickly
6 - i'm results orientated
7 - i play too long when i shouldn't, closely related to trying to 'bring sessions back into the black'
8 - i'm too much of a brm nit
9 - i withdraw too often
|
|
|
|
Penneywize
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 885
|
|
I'm too busy reading the commune
|
|
|
|
Carroters
|
|
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Da Amberlamps
Posts: 2,216
|
|
I haz mac.
|
|
|
|
BooG690
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,439
|
|
Poker is rigged.
|
That's how winners play; we convince the other guy he's making all the right moves.
|
|
Imthenewfish
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: sites im allowed to play on
Posts: 945
|
|
too much homework, wimenz, etc
|
|
|
|
supa
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 986
|
|
I'm just a shitty 5nl player and I suck.
|
“Right thoughts produce right actions and right actions produce work which will be a material reflection for others to see of the serenity at the center of it all”
Put hero on a goddamn range part II- The 6max years
Quote:
Originally Posted by d0zer
start using your brain more and vagina less
|
|
|
jyms
|
|
Tilting Mod
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 4,836
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by BooG690
Poker is rigged.
|
.
|
|
|
|
!Luck
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Under a bridge
Posts: 1,367
|
|
Poker is easy until I start making money, then identify myself as a poker player in my mind's eye and then i can't take the pressure and tilt. Rinse repeat, rinse repeat......
|
|
|
|
celtic123
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: **Officially**The worst poster on FTR
Posts: 708
|
|
I don't put people on ranges until Iv'e been stacked.
|
|
|
|
Icanhastreebet
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: In the big blind, cold calling your opens, making you tilt.
Posts: 995
|
|
i'm too high etc. who am I
|
|
|
|
kmind
|
|
Straight Flush
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Not Giving In
Posts: 4,240
|
|
anything out of my mouth
|
|
|
|
dranger7070
|
|
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Wake up in the mornin feelin' like P. Diddy
Posts: 2,524
|
|
Oh, perfect.
|
|
|
|
Penneywize
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 885
|
|
i just hit puberty etc. who am I
|
|
|
|
surviva316
|
|
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Confusing people with my liberal biblicisms
Posts: 1,625
|
|
i'm too good to post in this thread 'cause i'm already at 400nl in my second year of poker. who am i?
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by BooG690
I just wanted to share singing vaginas. |
|
|
Sasquach991
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Rat Cheer
Posts: 1,012
|
|
I don't have time to review HHs.
I know I shouldn't call but I'll just do it this one time cause he could be bluffing.
The more tables I play, the better I play.
I'm only playing too many tables to clear my bonus.
And my all time favorite that I use..
Villian's always at the top of his range.
|
"Just cause I'm from the South don't mean I ain't got no book learnin'"
Quote:
Originally Posted by a500lbgorilla
...we've all learned long ago how to share the truth without actually having the truth.
|
|
|
kfaess
|
|
Flush
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 556
|
|
variance; I'm running so much below EV
|
|
|
|
philly and the phanatics
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,109
|
|
but i dont wanna
|
|
|
|
bhaley66
|
|
Straight
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: washington
Posts: 150
|
|
my kids take too much time/attention... for reals tho lol
|
|
|
|
Gobbatino
|
|
Flush
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 341
|
|
I'm lazy.
|
|
|
|
PlayToWin
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 606
|
|
I forget that folding makes me money.
|
|
Explain...what I do for a living without saying "I make monies in da 600 enels by pwnin' tha donk bitches". Instead I say "I'm a online financial redistribution broker". - Sasquach991
|
|
rong
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Beachside
Posts: 1,196
|
|
I dind't know she was dating kmind
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Micro2Macro
hey guys, if you ever make a snap call on the river when your opponent raises you're fucking retarded.
Fucking. Retarded.
|
|
|
tiltisthename
|
|
High Card
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 12
|
|
Whenever I have the best hand I'm often sucked out on.
|
|
|
|
kmind
|
|
Straight Flush
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Not Giving In
Posts: 4,240
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hoopy
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Riverballs
Posts: 777
|
|
I autopilot way too much.
|
|
|
|
tyrn
|
|
Straight
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 189
|
|
I don't mind paying to see cards.
|
|
|
|
Penneywize
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 885
|
|
I don't get no respect.
|
|
|
|
celtic123
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: **Officially**The worst poster on FTR
Posts: 708
|
|
He's French.
|
|
|
|
kiwiMark
|
|
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Nu Zuland bru
Posts: 939
|
|
I withdraw too much
|
|
|
|
HarleyGuy13
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,226
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Icanhastreebet
i'm too high etc. who am I
|
DRANGER?
|
"You start the game with a full pot o’ luck and an empty pot o’ experience...
The object is to fill the pot of experience before you empty the pot of luck."
Quote:
Originally Posted by XxStacksxX
Do you have testicles? If so, learn to bet like it  |
|
|
OngBonga
|
|
Full House
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: England
Posts: 1,053
|
|
Implied odds.
Quote:
Originally Posted by celtic123
He's French.
|
Haha!
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by wufwugy
ongies gonna ong
|
|
|
pcgnome
|
|
High Card
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 1
|
|
Poker is to be considered a form of gambling only when you are the loser.
|
|
|
|
Hawk
|
|
Flush
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 367
|
|
The past: I already know about putting people on ranges, so I don't have to do it anymore.
The next couple years: OMG CIV5!!!!
|
|
|
|
dranger7070
|
|
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Wake up in the mornin feelin' like P. Diddy
Posts: 2,524
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by HarleyGuy13
DRANGER?
|
My excuse has never been I was too high.
|
|
|
|
BooG690
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,439
|
|
Psht...what morans itt. Dranger being high doesn't stop him from playing poker.
|
|
|
|
Carroters
|
|
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Da Amberlamps
Posts: 2,216
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by BooG690
Psht...what morans itt. Dranger being high doesn't stop him calling 3 bets with Q7s, floating J9x flops, shoving on T turns and sucking out on rivars.
|
FYP
|
|
|
|
dranger7070
|
|
4-of-a-Kind
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Wake up in the mornin feelin' like P. Diddy
Posts: 2,524
|
|
I agree with both posts.
Edit: And I love that Carroters the exact runout of the board lol
|
|
|
English
Deutsch
Español
Français
Italiano
Nederlands
Pусский
Svenska
05-26-2012, 03:08 PM Australia Legalized Online Poker coming up in next 6 to 12 Months
Linear Mode
