My Joke - If you read you must reply w/ a better one

what is the best thing about a 7 year old girl?

flip her over and it is the same thing as a 7 year old boy

what is better than that?

killing her

whats better than fucking an 8 year old girl in the shower....

slicking her hair back so she looks 6.

whats the difference between a truck load of dead babies, and a truck load of bowling balls.....

you can only unload 1 with a pitchfork

i have a really good joke but it uses the "N" word. its not a really bad one, but i would have to get some approval to tell it.

i guess i could join 1 strikesville though

after all the jokes in this thread, bodeist is asking for approval
you must have one bad ass joke

good luck in strike onesville

a catholic priest and a rabbi co-own an adoption agency, tragically the orphanage catches fire one day, "what should we do?" exclaimed the priest
"well we've got to get out of here, but our car only has room for 2 people"
"Well what about the children?" says the priest
"FUCK THE CHILDREN" the rabbi snapped
"Do we have time?" .........

A man is vacationing in Jamaica with his wife. He is taking a leak and this Rastaman notices that he has the letters WDY Tatooed on his penis, the Rasta had to ask him why, the vacationer replied "I got it for my wife, when I get an erection the tatoo reads WENDY". The next day the tourist is taking a leak and he sees the same rasta taking a leak and he notices that the rasta has the letters WDY tatooed on his penis now, he asks "Is your wife named Wendy too?", the rasta says proudly, "Nah mon, I got it for ya wife mon, when I get an erection it reads welcome to Jamaica and have a nice day!"

*Last edited by GatorJH on Thu, 17 Aug 2006, 6:04am; edited 1 time in total*

What is easier to unload - a truckload of bowling balls or a truckload of dead baby's?

The dead baby's, you can use a pitchfork.

edit - Didn't see page two before posting this. Sorry for the re-run

Little Billy, Johnny and Davey were sitting in their room when mom called up - "You guys come on down for breakfast".

Little Davey is the first to get up, wanders downstairs and into the kitchen where mom asks - "What would you like for breakfast Davey?". Without hesitation Davey replies "How about some damn Oatmeal". Mom instantly smacks Davey upside the head and sends him over to stand in the corner.

Billy and Johnny hear all of this and look at each other to see who is going downstairs next. Johnny gets up and heads downstairs, glances at Davey standing in the corner while mom asks - "Well Johnny, what would you like for breakfast?".

In his nicest, most pleasing voice Johnny replies - "Can I please have some damn oatmeal?" In a fit of rage mom smacks Johnny the entire time she is leading him to stand in the other corner.

Reluctantly Billy comes downstairs and steps into the kitchen. Mom gives him a stern look and asks the same question she asked of his brothers. Billy looks over at Johnny, then glances at Davey and back at mom, who also looks at the other two brothers and says - "Well?"

Billy, stands there fidgeting for a moment, then solves the dilemma in his head and as proudly as he can exclaims - "Well you can bet your ass I don't want any damn oatmeal!".

let me preface this by saying i am in no way a racist, and this j0ke is not horribly offensive, but i could be offensive to some.

A black guy and his son are on a flight about halfway through the trip, when the plane experiences some heavy turbulence. The pilot comes over the intercom and tells everyone that one of the 4 engines has failed. The pilot assures everyone that the plane is fine, but if another engine fails they will have to get rid of some of the weight on the plane.

After a few more minutes the plane shakes violently again, and the pilot announces that they lost the use of a second engine. The pilot says, "In order to lessen the load on the last 2 engines, were going to have to ask some of the passengers to jump out the door." "In order to do this as fair as possible," the pilot says, "were going to ask people to get off in alphabetical order based on race."

"Lets start with the A's", the pilot says. "All the African-Americans please come to the front and jump out the door."

The little boy looks at his dad, and they dont budge.

The pilot continues, "OK, if there are no African Americans we will move on to the B's. Any black people please come to the front and jump out the door."

Again the little boy looks at his dad for direction, and again the dad doesnt move.

The pilot says, "OK, no black people, lets go to the C's. All Colored people, please come to the front of the plane and jump out the door."

Now the little boy is getting confused and looks at his dad and says, "Dad, they have called us 3 times. How come we havent gone yet?"

The dad looks at him and says, "Son, were N***ers today, the Mexicans are going first!"

why couldnt helen keller drive?

cause shes a woman

why do you put a baby into a blender feet first?

so you can see the expression on its face.

This one isn't obscene, but I think it's funny.

Teacher: There are three birds sitting on a wire. If you shoot one how many are left?
Jonny: Zero, because when you shoot the first one the other two will fly away.
Teacher: Well, the answer I was looking for was 2 but I like the way you think.

At recess Jonny walks over to the teacher and points at three women sitting on a bench.
Jonny: Teacher, which one isn't married.
The teacher looks, one is eating a brownie, one is licking a popsicle, and one is eating a cookie
Teacher: The one licking the popsicle?
Jonny: No, the one without a wedding ring, but I like the way you think

What is this obsession with dead babies???

I have a pretty raunchy sense of humor, I don't even get too offended by racist jokes, or religious jokes as long as they're al in good fun but DEAD BABIES WTF!!!! I supose some people thinK it's funny because it's unexpected but C'mon man, DEAD BABIES?? That's some depressing shit. Can you imaging waiting 9 months for your child to be born and it dies?? With the 100s of viewers on this forum, that's likely happened to one of them, babies do die and those babies have parents. Is it too much to ask that you joke about everything except dead babies??

Whats the difference between Poker and Church?

When you pray at the table you really mean it.

What nationality is Mr Sheen?

Polish.

A guy with two left feet walks into a shoe shop and says...

Have you got any flip-flips?

Why don't tampons talk to each other?
Because their stuck up Cunts.
Answers in white
Why did the farmer cross the road?
his dick was stuck in the chicken.

for your kids,
what did the necktie say to the tophat?

you go on ahead, and I'll just hang around.

2 guys walk into a bar....

the third one ducks.

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